Should I be worried if he didn't kiss me on a first date or am I just over thinking a good date?

I went out for dinner with a guy who's 6 years older than me. We'd been talking for months but only recently met the first time. When he came to pick me up, he hugged me and gave me a peck on the cheek. During dinner he was very engaging, very open and he at times spoke about us in the future... something like that anyway. I told him how nervous I was and he said he tried to make me feel better by saying how excited he was to meet me.

All in all he was a gentleman and it was an amazing date, he dropped me home and he said how much of a great time he had and said I shouldn't be nervous next time... Then he gave me a peck on the cheek... And that was it.

I feel slightly disappointed that he didn't kiss me.
Updates:
So he texted me yesterday, asked me out on a second date next week.. Any suggestions as to how I can show him I do like him but not looking to jump straight to sex?”
He kissed me!!😍
So we ended up seeing each other for a couple months after this and when I asked if he saw it going anywhere serious? He ghosted me.

Men are trash.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Some girls get offended at a guy wanting a kiss on the first date and other girls are ready to have sex on a first date. A guy rarely knows what a girl expects and he may have simply been playing it safe.

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    • This is entirely correct and a very smart move on that dudes part. Let him know what you want.

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    • It was nice! I loved it and he made a little joke during it, he’s so cute☺️ it wasn’t long but it was just right😂

    • Men are not all trash. Maybe this one guy was trash but that doesn't make all men trash. Were there any warning signs?

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 48

  • This means he likes you and respects you, wants to see you again. I almost never kiss on the lips on a first date with a woman I like and want to see again just for this reason, it leaves her wanting more!! He did the right thing.

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  • It's fine if he didn't kiss you on the first date and it's always better not to do that on the first date. I would say he did the right thing by not kissing you.

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  • ... You kept telling him you were nervous!!! That's like wearing a big sign that says "Please don't do anything drastic like kiss me or I might pass out!"

    He's older than you, clearly a gentleman, and considerate. He wants to kiss you, he just wants to wait until he feels like he's not rushing you. Trust me. 😉

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  • You're overthinking this. Some guys just don't kiss on the lips on a first date. And some girls are really offended if the guys kiss them on the lips on the first date.

    If you wanted him to kiss you, then you initiate.

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  • We aren't mind readers, we can't tell what you want, we have to guess and gauge. Gentlemen are less likely to kiss on the first date, don't over think this. You may have found a keeper.

    Personally I would might not have even gone for the peck on the cheek at this stage. On a first date I'm there to see if you like me and are compatible personality wise, not how fun you are to kiss, that's later.

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  • I mean you'll only know for sure if he sets up another date.

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    • I feel like I totally agree with you but here's the thing.. We planned to meet before he started his new job. H was telling me how he would be primarily focused on his job for a while so he can get in on their good books and after just 2 days into his new job I feel like it'll be hard to differentiate whether he's just genuinely busy or doesn't want to.

      Didn't even know if I should give a text today or not because I don't want to seem like the clingy type or whatever...

      This is all so confusing...

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    • Curious_kk

      Sugestions to show that you like him:

      Be physical, light touches.

      Take time to look good. Guys notice when you just threw something on vs when you tried to look good (even when they don't say it.

      And lastly just be there. The fact that you chose to spend time w/ him and not do literally anything else shows that you like him.

    • Thank You😊

  • I usually try to kiss on the first date so a girl knows 100% that I like her. But some dates are difficult to incorporate light touching into so if I haven't managed to do that during the date I'll just give a peck on the cheek (even if I want more) as going for a full on kiss might be too much and come as a surprise for the girl. It needs to be a natural buildup or the girl will think the kiss was too fabricated and not something that the guy actually wanted to do.

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  • Every men is different. Not kissing you on the mouth on a first date as a gentlemen is more common then I thought. Especially if you never met before, and you were nervous. It was a good date. Very high chance he is just taking it slow for you. I'd do the same if I was him. I'm the slow kinda guy as well. Ask him for another date or two and you'll know.

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  • Guys have learned recently to not pursue. It has to be the woman otherwise the man feels like he should not. At least the woman should indicate if she would like to go in that direction.

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  • Try being in a man's shoes, women are hard to read sometimes, maybe he was just trying to be respectful yet affectionate, he could be taking it slow to ease you into it because you said you were nervous, we aren't mind readers. And sometimes it's hot when a women makes the first move

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  • Dude was trying to show you have no reason to be nervous of him taking advantage... but did you clarify why you were nervous? Was it cause you like him and you were expecting it? I have asked if I could kiss her once on a first date knowing she was totally into me, she said yes yet I still was nervous as I leaned in to kiss her.

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  • He's giving you a Chase and wanting of more of him that's a good way of starting out a relationship , most likely he has been in relationship multiple times and is tired of the fast and done relationship over and over and maybe wants to take things slow and want to settle down since you said he's 26 years old he's more mature than other new dudes on the market which is great. Best advice is go at a pace you two are comfortable with.

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  • That's exactly how things should have went he was a gentleman, you're just over thinking

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  • Hey don't be disappointed. I think he is a nice guy. A gentleman.

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  • Nope dear you don't have to disappoint really a decent guy , you are so lucky to have him in your life but he prefer to kiss on forehead rather then cheek by my opinion

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  • What is there to worry.. may be he wanted to kiss too but dont you think kiss on a very first date is little bit early.. may he will kiss in the coming 2 or 3 dates..

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  • um. sounds like you two had a great time. nothing to be disappointed about. maybe be patient? See what date 2 has to offer.

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  • He's playing it safe. If he thinks a kiss is ok, and it's not, then it's REALLY bad. Besides, your comments about being nervous would especially have made him be safe, as he wouldn't want to move too fast.

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  • I dont kiss on the first date, never had.. I would not sweat it..

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  • Just overthinking but please let him know if he is shy that you want him. Or else he might be afraid. Touching is a goodnidea. Massage on next date or something..

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  • You are over thinking it.
    I myself don't usually kiss on the first date. And I'm a very difficult person to read.

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  • No need to be disappointed, you'll get it next time :) this is normal! Some guys prefer to proceed more slowly and that's totally fine. No cause for concern

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  • You're overthinking it. That's okay. I overthink everything too.

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  • Gotta see where it goes. I'd say of it hasn't happened by the second or third date to then just be straight forward and ask what's up and why it hasn't happened.

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  • You're overthinking it. Maybe he just didn't want to seem too forward or rushing the relationship. And if you wanted a kiss that much, why didn't you kiss him?

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    • I didn’t want to be too forward..

    • But you're saying he should risk the possibility that he's being too forward?
      Ok, if you don't actually kiss him, at least let him know that's what you want. Say something.

  • Sounds like he was being respectful of you and didn't want to rush and risk scaring you away.

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  • He was playing it safe. If you want him to kiss your next time make sure your body language suggests that you want that.

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  • Give him time, it's ok, just try to make him feel comfortable near you and feel the best when thinking about you.
    The time will come don't worry.

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  • Nah, don't be. That was his way of showing you respect. But, you could have kissed him. Just staying.

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  • Your over thinking it. A lot of guys dont kiss on the first date. Im one of them, unless of course, the woman asks.

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What Girls Said 12

  • I don't think it necessarily means that he didn't like you. Maybe he is trying to to take things slow with you because you are so shy. Wait and see if he is interested by observing his behaviour from here on now.

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  • Don't worry, he was being a genlteman. You told him you were nervous, so he didn't want to push it too far. He sounds really nice. It was a great date, don't over think stuff. Be cool and next time you see each other you should give him a peck on the lips and be like "I regreted not doing that the other day" and continue talking and see how he reacts ;)

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    • Shit I'm sorry. We've all been there, it really sucks. But be glad you realised what kind of man he is before you got hooked and suffered even more

  • Babes, sounds like it was perfect. You shouldn't kiss on the first date. This is a guy who wants to take things slow and do things right. A keeper.

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    • Id really like to think so! So many questions about the whole situation

    • Yeah, I bet! No harm in a cheeky kiss on the second though. First all for finding that spark. Second is for exploring it. 😘

  • That's respect. Besides, a peck is still a kiss. Plus, he implied that there will be a next time. So, relax, and don't overthink anything.

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  • You're overthinking it. A lot for people think kissing on the first date is moving too fast. Everyone is different. Sometimes it's better to take things slow.

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  • I think he just being gentlemen not rushing thing take it slow maybe with past relationships it went to fast.

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  • You should be worried 😁😂. I mean most guys I've gone on a date with always found a way to kiss me

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  • Overthinking.

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  • Nah its fine

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  • You shouldn't be worried

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  • I think especially with the age difference, that he is trying to keep from scaring you away. I would see it as a good thing that he was concerned with how you felt.

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  • Like the Bible, and the words of God says. “He whom never kiss thou at the ensnared of an e'en of dancing doth not deserve that last look of thy longing”. (Moses 8:8).

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