My boyfriend has random hot/pretty girls on Facebook, should I confront him?

I’m talking about random girls from random states. They’re not friends from highschool

what makes me more bummed is that 95% of the girls on his Facebook are hot and or gorgeous and he likes some of their photos :/

truhfully what hat makes me upset the most is that 1) he doesn’t like any of his guy friend photos and 2) he has some EXTREMELY hot chicks on there. Like they’re a party girl type etc

Do I confront him?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • No because get a life.

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    • Wow you have an amazing explanation that allowes one to under stand 🙂 thank you for the mostly terrible advice

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    • I’ve done it from the start actually! He’s known my password for months.

      Again thank you for your help!

    • Yeah no problem. I am glad it all worked out for you.

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What Guys Said 109

  • I wouldn't worry About it- he doesn't know them and probably isn't doing more than liking their pics. Talk to him About it if it bothers you so much that it affects your relationship or daily life.

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  • I would ask, yes, how he knows these women. Try to do it in a way where you don't come off as jealous so as to not make him defensive. If he goes defensive, you'll never get any information out of him. I'd also say if these girls are states away and they are too far for him to visit he's checking out randos. This is still not great and my perspective is that he should respect you enough to not do that with other women.

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  • Oh God no! Leave it alone. I can guarantee you one or more of a few things is going on and none of them end well with you confronting him. The LEAST likely is that they are his side hoes and he is cheating on you with them. Only worry about that if you see him get nudes on his phone (but also do not snoop, you should trust him more tha that). The MOST likely is that they are strangers he added when he was single because single guys ALWAYS add attractive ladies, and not just because we want to date them. We think we seem cooler if people see our FB friends are good looking. Plus, Facebook and Instagram is only good for looking at hot chicks, sorry not sorry. That is why he added them and he likes their photos because they are good looking. It is an impulse.
    Now the bad news. Yeah this is the actually bad news. There is a chance he is just being friendly. But, the reality is that ALL guys look at hot chicks even when they are in a relationship. It is compulsive. BUT they will almost never act on it. The like button is usually the most they will ever do. If he is DMing them, and or cheating then confronting him now is a mistake. If he is guilty, he will deny all the way to hell or try to convince you he will change (he wont). Or he will just break up with you and tell people you were a slut and crazy and spied on him (which is terrible, but it is a go-to for cheaters). And if he is innocent and he was only liking the photos and/or they turn out to be relatives or something you were unaware of, he might never trust you again.
    Assuming you are right, he shouldn't be liking their photos, but if you do not trust him just break up with him.

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  • It all depends. Men look. So do women. But whenever I look I try to find flaws in the girls I'm looking at. I try to find something that I feel makes them not as attractive as they try to seem that the girl I'm with has. For example. Integrity, personality and confidence. Be confident in your guy. Make a joke out of it. If you see him doing it, be like oh hey! So and so is REALLY looking pretty sexy today!

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    • My boyfriend says he does look at other girls and kinda judge them. Like are they for are they not. Etc.

      So I shouldn’t be concerned if he has a few random girls on Facebook Andy is liking their photos? 😕 like really gorgeous ones that are local and some not local

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    • She went camping with friends and she said his baby sister was as cute as he always says. He blocked her after I told himitnwsnt okay. He comes home to me always now. I feel like I trust him but that story always gets to me. I don’t understand why he turned the tables on me. I don’t understand how he could forget what exactly happened. Also I know they were playing games in her bedroom. The picture he showed me was her with a sticky note on her forehead. She had to guess what she drew. So I’m not sure.

    • Wasn’t as cute***

  • I would say that's a "lack of maturity" type.. yes comfort him about his likes and let him know that your feelings matter and you want to be heard. if he does not care then you don't need to be with a man like that

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  • If he says they are just friends you should take his word for it. If you have trust issues about it discuss about it with him. Or break up with him and look for someone who doesn't have hot girls as friends.

    It is normal to have friends of the opposite sex, even hot ones.

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  • so he doesn't really know them beyond the photos on fb?

    effectively it's social media soft porn. he likes to ogle attractive girls. i personally find it odd and rather crass but it is in all honesty harmless. he could ogle chicks on the street, he can ogle chicks online... the only difference is online you can see the ones he "likes"

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    • well on the street you can't help but see and notice people walking by, and you never see them again but seeking them out on facebook is quite different, and he can see their lives, get to know them... and if he is liking those photos he is initiating contact too

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    • oh but I do, girls who accept invitations to social media from strange men and post attention seeking photos of themselves, they are not shy to chat the man up

  • I suppose it'd be a good idea to confront him about it. Don't be aggressive until you have more solid proof, because he might play the victim card and feel "offended" that you doubt him. More often than not, people that respond that way to accusations are hiding something.

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    • He did tell me that. I feel like I should trust him because when I asked him about liking all of my female friends pics that was recommended in his follow list, he said he didn’t think it was a big deal. He saw that she was my friend and thought he’d follow her. And once he followed her all her photos came up to his feed and he liked all of them.

      I told him he didn’t like all of my photos and it came off as weirder cause when you like all of someone’s photos, I thought it meant you were into them. He said he didn’t find her attractive at all. (Personally she’s not ugly but she’s not the hottest. She’s average like me).

      So he unfollowed her and like all photos later when the conversation was forgotten about.

      What are your thoughts?

      Last night I got drunk at my friends 21sr birthday party. He joined me after work and then he picked me up and put me to bed later. I woke up 3 hours later. Somewhat the alcohol wore off and told me I was cute and sweet. He said he loved me and that

    • He was happy to have me.

    • As long as he does appreciate you and acts in a way that proves that "you're more than enough" and he doesn't need to look for other girls, and doesn't actually act defensive about what he did, I think it's fine. I'm glad the situation got sorted out. 😁

  • Stop being insecure and be an adult, liking pictures shouldn't dictate your feelings or relationship status

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    • But adding random hot girls on Facebook? :/

    • So? Just because YOU find them hot doesn't mean he feels the same way, again, you're just being insecure and overthinking. He could have total and complete platonic relationships with every single one of those girls if he truly loves you

  • No, it's only FB. If he isn't showing any signs that are out of the ordinary you should leave it be, especially if you know that they're just random girls. If he's liking your photos as well as these other women, maybe he just appreciates a pretty girl yourself included.

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  • Random girls that he has no relationship with on his social media that post racy pics that he likes while ignoring the ones of his guy friends?

    Yeah, you should definitely confront him about that. Very suspicious behavior.

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  • He has them on Facebook but he's with you in real life! Which situation do you prefer? :) If it's the latter then don't make a big deal out of it. If you want to talk about it, then be sexy and ask him which one is your favorite, why, and tell him which one YOU think is hottest!

    Oh and spending less time on Facebook and more time living life is ALWAYS a good idea, just saying! :)

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  • U decide

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  • He deserves better.
    You and your kind of girls with your social media obsessions and indescribable insecurities are ruined and then take it out on us.

    Feed me with the downvotes. I'm hungry 😋

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  • Be thankful that he doesn't like the Guy photos. You're lucky! Does he message any of them? Are they local where is could access/visit them? And are you exclusively seeing your boyfriend? Did YOU set any expectations on the relationship that he did not agree to?

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    • It’s not a thing for a guy to like other guy photos?
      I’m not sure if he messages them. I don’t se who’s phone often nor do I know the code

      Many of them are local and some are not

      We are in a monogomaous relationship and we’ve both made that clear

      I’m not sure what you mean by expectations. We dont mind each other having friends of the opposite gender as long as nobody’s flirting etc and they are willing to meet each other

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    • I didn’t know. I didn’t really stalk his friends till I became concerned about his old female friend who didn’t want to meet me. And when I did stalk, it was only to stalk her. They’re no longer friends anymore after I had proven to him that I had reason to worry about her. She didn’t want to meet me, they hung out alone, she was scuicidal and he opened up emotionally to her. p, and later I found he lied to me about a lot and he told me he went to her house and bedroom. He was being a hypocrite cause he told me guys and girls can’t be friends. My guy friends would invite me over to play video games or for a party and he wouldn’t be okay with it.

      I ended up talking to him about it social media, More like I found something to bring it up. he followed my friend from high school, who I only mentioned once and had little significance to me at this point. He said she was a suggestion (he followed one of my guy friends too). But I saw he liked all her photos.

    • Which made me feel concerned. He said he felt like I didn’t trust him but I told him if I didn’t trust him, I wouldn’t had moved in despite knowing my doubt between him and his previous female friend. I slightly mentioned the pretty girls on his Facebook. He said “so just because they’re pretty you're concerned?” then he asked me even if he did look at other girls, he always comes home to me and he wouldn’t be bothered if I looked at guys with abs cause he knew they’re there and I’d come home to him.

      What’s weird was he said that if I had cheated on him (I would never) he wouldn’t leave me regardless cause he’s already invested in me. (We’ve been through some stuff for each other. Like my family hates his).

      I told him I didn’t mind at all that he added my friends but I asked him why he chose to follow them. He said they were simply suggested on fb so he followed them. He said “is that bad?”

  • Why are you scared about? How about lemme ask you something, what makes you special to him?

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    • I don’t like that he’s liking other girls photos. I don’t like knowing he’s attracted to other girls and I don’t like knowing he checks them out. Putting a like on photos is kinda acting on it. It’s saying “I like this photo you look pretty”

      He has done a lot for me of course, and I gave him a letter telling him that I appreciate him. It made me happy to see the look on his face and he hugged and kissed me. He’s put up with me.

      But still. He looks at other girls. I don’t feel special knowing he does

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    • Thank you :)

    • Be amazing today 😁😁😊😊👋👋

  • Ya go on with it.
    Confront him as becuse he's your man. You have all rights to ask. Why he's don't like any of his friends photos , rather than clicking likes on hot and gorgeous girl.
    Ask him genuinely as it there's need to be understandings in every aspect

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  • These are not good signs honestly 😣
    Reasons for having those girls on his face book are that he added them from popular pages and thought they were pretty. So now he's liking their pics cause he thinks they will notice him that way. These girls most likely get guys doing this all the time so it might not be much to worry about but if you do confront him be very observant of his reaction and how fast he replies.

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  • I wouldn't advise confronting him until he leaves an inappropriate comment on their pictures or something like that

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    • Can you explain to me why it’s okay?

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    • So then what do I do?

    • Start adding hot guys and start liking their pictures

  • Not unless he gives you a reason to doubt... Someone's jelly?

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    • Well of course I am. I hate seeing that my boyfriend finds other people attractive too. Well that’s a given but I feel like liking a picture is acting on it in some way and it bugs me :(

    • Why don't you show you are above this? I give you this advise in hope it helps,
      It's not enough to conquer, one must learn to seduce.
      You only have the power to shift he's attention back to you the way you did in the beginning... You understand what I'm Saying right?

    • Thank you :)

  • Confront him about what?

    Your insecurities?

    Your inability to distinguish between Facebook and the real world?

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    • Facebook is the real world?

    • The real world made Facebook so whatcha talking about it not being real. 😅
      At most not everything is posted and some might post a fake life but hey the photos are there. Those ARE THE PEOPLE IN THE REAL world sooo I don’t understand

  • Men have wandering eyes for other women we are attracted to.
    It is not a sign of disloyalty for him to look at other girls. If he is flirting with them, that is another story.

    I wouldn't "confront" him, as that seems more aggressive than would be proper in my opinion.

    You should, however, be able to talk with your partner about any issues you have with them. Just don't approach it with a win-lose, "one of us must be wrong" mindset.

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    • he can look at other girls while walking past them on the street, why add them and like their photos? some of those girls for sure start a chat after that

    • That is a possibility. He could be disloyal. He could be playing the field. He could just be looking for looking's sake.

      We don't know. He does.

      If he has a history of infidelity, this could be a problem.

      Talk to him about what is concerning you. I can't give much more advice about someone I don't know.

  • Nope that's dumb just because he liked someones photo or added them don't mean he cares about them or wants them more than you. Plus it's not like he is ever gonna meet them. Heck i have lots hot girls i fallow on instagram but i don't care about a single one and if i was with someone i would say that i would care less but i already don't care.

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  • Nope, just dump him. Then seek professional help. You have major jealousy issues, and probably some detrimental insecurities. Normal, healthy people don't stalk other people's accounts like that. Frankly, you don't need to go there at all, unless you're tagged. This is always going to be a problem for you unless you get help.

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  • Girls look too! We all do! Unless he is cheating with them best not to let it bother you or you come across jealous which will push him away.

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  • i think you should move on. he's not satisfied and fantasizes about other girls. i've only done what you're stating when i have a girl that i care for.

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  • What would be the point of confronting him? He's either going to lie or justify it - HE CHOSE to follow them.
    He's keeping his options open. What's YOUR backup plan?

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  • what do you mean "confront him"? i'm sure he knows that he's doing that and you should really be a bit more confident. men gawk at hot chicks. that's how we work. that's not a sign that you're not good enough, cause there's litterally always a prettier girl around the corner.

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    • So I’m supposed to be okay with him liking pictures of pretty girls? :(

    • Yes. It shouldn't bother you, cause he's with you, not with those girls.

    • Okay, well in that case, the way you put it. You’re right. Thank you

  • News flash there are hot people in the world. And guess what, hot people have friends too. So chances are some people that you know (including your bf) may have hot friends. Holy fucking shit! Work on your insecurities or you'll be single soon.

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    • just because there are hot people in the world does that mean he has to spend his time adding them on facebook and going through their photos? he doesn't even know them

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    • @Porcelaine obsessing over someone's fb profile is not healthy curiosity. It breeds further insecurities. But anyway you have your opinion, you can handle situations like this as you see fit when they arise in your life.

    • she's not obsessing over a profile, she just wants to know whether or not his activities are harmless

  • Please, do not do it.

    Watch "Men and the power of visual" on youtube. 5 minutes to save you and your boyfriend an unnecessary argument. It's worth it.

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  • Show more from Guys
    79

What Girls Said 53

  • It's Facebook. They don't live anywhere near you. Who cares? Why make something that is literally nothing an issue?

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    • I’m bothered because why is he adding random pretty girls? 😕 and some are actually in the same town
      Why would someone need to? I’m bothered he looks at other girls

    • He doesn't need to do it. Nobody needs to like anything on any social media platform but it's probably there so he just does it. I wouldn't concern myself with it too much, there are always going to be hot girls on the internet. Just worry about being the best version of yourself, and confident and secure female is far more attractive than any made up doll on the web.

  • In a way I feel like it's similar to guys looking at porn. Do you feel uncomfortable or make him feel bad about doing that or are you accepting of it? Because most guys do. Sometimes it makes us feel insecure like "why am I not good enough?" And it's not a crazy question. It doesn't mean you're a psycho. It just means you're comparing yourself to other people, and you might be worried that he isn't happy or satisfied with you. If he starts to neglect you and stays glued to his phone and Facebook all the time, or like you suggested with hiding his phone screen, I think it's okay to talk to him about it. But you might not be happy with the answer that you get. I'm banking that he's hiding something and you kind of know what it might be. If he won't confess and is acting strangely after you brought it up chances are high that it's sus. I think if you bring it up and he doesn't come clean about why he's acting that way. I would drop him and run in the other direction, sadly. Sometimes we have to understand that it's okay to let go of people we love if they're hurting us. It doesn't make you a bad person, and yes you're the one who still cares. But it doesn't mean you have to let someone keep doing this to you.

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    • Most guys do when they are single.

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    • Nope just when they single

    • Yea... okay.

  • Only if it's exessive. LIf he likes ALL of their photos and post comments and things like that, then I would confront him. Otherwhise, I bet on Instagram you like pics of hot actors and things like that... Social media ruins relationships. As long as he is not messaging them or posting comments like "You look amazing <3", I wouldn't mind. But if it's exessive, I would slide the comment that it's making you uncomfortable because he does it way too much.

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  • YES. This is a Slap in your own Pretty face.
    he is Disrespecting you and tell him if he Continues Doing it, You will Throw him away like the Trash he is. Any guy who does This and his Girlfriend finds out, Tells me he is Not Ready for anyone Steady like Betty. xx

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  • It's facebook, it doesn't matter and you're way overreacting. If it makes you feel bad you should talk to him about it though (in a nice not crazy jealous way). I suggest you also do some reflecting on why it makes you feel bad. He's always gonna look at other girls no matter what and that shouldn't bother you this much. Is it that he's looking or that he's actually liking the pics so everyone can see it?

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  • Hi, I'm maybe a bit older than you but for ages now men have had pics in their work place on models, it goes back to the yer dot, if he didn't look or try and write to pretty girls he wouldn't be normal, leave him to his little fun sessions, the main thing is how is he with you, if he makes you feel great when together let it go,
    I was told a long time ago, when out flirting is fine but at the end of the night you go home to your love one,

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  • If you were confident in yourself you wouldn't be trippin' on girl Facebook friends he had before you. If they were ugly women would you care? Be confident in what you have to offer and you won't worry about his fb friends. Insecurity is a relationship killer.

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  • You can't really "confront" him without sounding like a jealous girlfriend.

    "Babe, I was scrolling through your FB page and I saw you have a lot of really pretty girls as your friends. I'm really insecure so I want you to unfriend and block them all and get uglier female friends."

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  • He's with you, so he obviously likes you. You shouldn't be concerned unless he has a past with cheating. Some people just enjoy looking at pretty people, either because they're aesthetically pleasing to look at or just because it kills the time. If anything, just ask him kindly and don't make any assumptions without knowing what's truly going on.

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    • How do I ask him? What do I Say?

    • Just say "Can I have your snapchat?(and you can mention wanting to have a streak with him)"

    • Oh lmao wrong question. Just ask nicely and say you're a little concerned

  • Tell him how you’re feeling. If you feel like it’s something to confront him about and it’s bugging you then there’s no use just keeping it to yourself and getting even more upset about it. Maybe talk to him and you both and reach some understanding of some sort🤷🏼‍♀️

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  • I wouldn't confront him. He's not cheating and he's not hiding it. Plus it shows good taste in women, which, in a way , puts you in that category too. Would you be more offended if they were ugly girls? Or would it bother you?

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  • You could casually bring it up and ask what’s up with all these hot girls whose photos you like. If he responds casually and you can talk about it that’s good. Remember you can’t control his Facebook, but maybe he could be more careful and not go overboard. A lot of times girls post sexy photos cause they know they look good and want people to give them a thumbs up. If your boyfriend gets defensive and reacts negatively then he’s just being a jerk.

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  • You should be bothered when he still adds them or be friends with them on fb now that you two are together. This is just me, but if him being friends with all those chicks before he even met you, its not an issue.

    Him liking hot chicks’ photos even now that you two are in a relationship, THAT ISSUE YOU CAN CONFRONT HIM ABOUT. Even if he says “its just a pic”, if it makes you uncomfortable he will stop doing it as respect for your feelings and your relationship.

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  • Sounds like you want to control a guy and guys don’t want or like to be controlled heck even if my boyfriend told me to delete people from my fb I would step back and rethink the whole relationship. Trust him or dump him

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  • Honestly our opinions shouldn’t matter. If something’s upsetting you just talk to him. At least you won’t be wondering and letting this eat you up inside.

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  • I think you need to be honest with yourself about what you're okay with. And if you bring it up be polite whole expressing yourself. Let him know how it makes you feel. But that's not something I would be okay with but I wouldn't bring it up til we'd been together a while I think.

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  • I dont know. Honestly I would be upset too and ask him. But if he doesn't do anything with them. Its not his fault. We still have eyes even when we are into a relationship. Sometimes I see guys that look fine as hell but I wouldn't want anything with them. I find people attractive and done. That doesn't mean I would cheat. I love my man and what he does for a crazy chick like me.

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  • If he's with you, then he clearly prefers you over them. In saying that, if he starts acting shifty like something is up or just different from usual - ask him. But don't go jumping to conclusions right now.

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  • You're simply insecure. What's there to confront him about? He hasn't done anything other than like their pictures so really, what's your point? Get over your own insecurities and jelousy and let the man breathe. Also consider the fact that one of the most upsetting things to you is that these chicks are hot. If they were ugly would you react the same way? Probably not, which simply further proved my point. Work on yourself and on trusting your boyfriend because in the end that kind of behavior simply pushes him away. Best of luck!

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    • I don’t think it’s entirely insecurity. I think it’s just something she dislikes that her partner does. Perhaps she finds it disrespectful? I think to a degree activity like this CAN be disrespectful. Of course we are going to notice other attractive people. But, in a relationship someone shouldn’t be so blatant about it! I think she should just calmly express to her boyfriend how it makes her feel. Some girls are okay with their boyfriend doing this, and some aren’t. To each their own ☺️

    • @Calixx I agree. I recently got into a relationship myself and we talk about hot people together so I think you're right. To each their own. 😂

  • He is with you, have confidence in that. If it bothers you speak to him but i wouldn't worry about it if i were you. Liking a picture is great and all but it doesn't mean that he is interested in these woman

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  • Does he message them?
    But still you should confront...
    Not actually confront...
    But ask in a tricky polite way or ask playfully... but clear ur doubts or else they get stored in the head.. and you will then keep thinking about it... a small doubts can grow bigger and bigger can lead to a big misunderstanding

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  • Well guys look at girl the same way a girl would look at guy. Its a high chance he was already following these girls before you guys started dating. If your insecure about it then just tell him.

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    • I was sorta stalking him so I’m afraid to mention it

  • while maybe asking casually and in a lighthearted way whats up with all the random hotties on your FB, you'd do better to not seem so insecure about random people he'll never meet.

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  • Yeah u need to talk to him
    For me that sounds like cheating because he should only like photos of you , him, and family that it

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  • He should not be liking other girls pictures if he doesn't know them, and he definitely shouldn't be friends with them

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  • These could be likes as to things he’s showing certain aspects he has interests in on a woman in general.. though it probably would help for both of you to take a time to sit down and talk about it having a heart to heart chat. It sort of makes you uneasy and you just want to make sure that things are alright with you both and that he isn’t chatting too long and late at night with them. You want to work with him, and tbh in order for you “both” to work as a team, “both” have to be able to do what they can to work with “each” other.

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    • Listen carefully too to his thoughts on the matter too. You both should show you appreciate and respect each other through your actions as well.

  • Do you even trust him? Those are people on Facebook, they aren't trying anything or hurting him or hopefully not trying to destroy the relationship. I honestly think when people ask questions like these the first thing that comes to my mind is you're being insecure and over dramatic. The like of a picture on social media should not affect your relationship, if something as little as that is a problem, then stay single because obviously you are insecure an bothered by him doing that, I'd understand if he was messaging these girls or asking to sleep with him but in your post he's not doing that. If you feel the need to confront him over liking another girl's pictures or adding them on Facebook, then that should tell you something about yourself. Also, how do you know he's doing this or do you just go through his phone?

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  • No let him have them to see how much he respect you

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  • I know this is not easy. I had a boy that did the same thing. Actually two. It is an f-ing trend nowadays. I even follow a couple of hot models on IG. Models not reagulars wannabes to inflate their ego. F thay. Well.. Definitely NOT on facebook. Going on facebook and doing this is really going the extra mile to like a couple of hot chick photos. Creepy. To my eyes is soooo inmature.. and really untasteful and weak when you are in a relationship and just plain simple ever.
    You will sound jealous if you confront him. You will keep questioning this if you stay quite. So go aheah with what your heart tells you to do and just be aware of the posible consecuences.

    Maybe you should start making the same thing. Then wait for his reaction. 😎

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