Do you know how to get over gaslighting?

1. It's okay to be upset or emotional. Get all of your feelings out however you please. Don't let anyone call you bitter, mad or upset. You were PLAYED and GASLIGHTED. That's fucked up.

2. Realize how you could avoid that and identify men similar to the guy who hurt you. What made it easy for him to play/gaslight you? Work on your confidence, raising your standards and gaining wisdom.

3. Realize nothing good comes from being negative. Don't focus on revenge. What's sad is people going around hurting people because they're fucked up in some way. What's good is you were able to grow and learn from a toxic ass situation.

4. The man who gas lighted WILL try to piss you off to create another outburst if he sees you moving on. These guys run in cliques to purposely fuck with strong women with high self esteem. Move in silence. Don't tell him shit about moving on. Block him on everything, ignore him and even get a restraining order if you have too.

5. These guys aren't right in the head. They will use anything to fuck with you. Any information you gave them. ANYTHING. If you're a virgin, they'll call you a slut. They'll deliberately spread rumors about you and you will notice the immature/inane adults soaking that drama up to piss you off on purpose ignore it.

6. Find something to focus on. Have you ever wanted to surf? Learn. Wanna learn something? Study. Do positive things in your life and grow for yourself. Be a a stronger woman then you were yesterday.

7. I know it's hard not to pay attention when people you cared about talk shit about you, but don't. They'll play with your emotions. Being control of yourself, your own thoughts and actions.

8. Don't think about them. Block then out entirely. Get rid of anything that reminds of them.

9. If you like writing and communicating like me, buy a journal. It's a good way to let go of anger and sadness. You can cheer yourself up with your wise words and inspire yourself.

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Well written. :)

    You might consider making this a so-called “myTake”. It’s a section of this site/app where opinions pieces like this are posted and discussed.

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  • You make it seem like gaslighting is only a thing males do? As far as i know women can be just as manipulative as men in this way, occasionally even more. But otherwise, if your points were set in a gender neutral context i'd fully agree.

    But then its a lot harder to get a RO (point 4) on a woman if she is that toxic. Otherwise it all makes sense.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You know what I do? I calmly sit down, drink a cup of tea, and move on. Cut all ties with the person and cease to acknowledge their precense. I did this once and it royally pissed em off, and I found it hilarious. The lengths some people go to for attention...

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What Guys Said 12

  • There a lot of wrong things with this like "nothing good comes from been negtive" well that's totally wrong. "don't let anyone call you bitter, mad or upset" so people aren't allowed to call you what you are i guess a murder is no longer allowed to be called a murder just like how you cannot call someone mad. And there is hella a lot more wrong with this but i digress.

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  • I feel you. The union does this all the time. The teachers union in PA gaslighted and harrassed a 14 year old rape victim until she took her own life. Be glad it was one shitbag and not a group of child molesters that say they're helping people.

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  • Agree except for 1. Your emotions are your emotions, deal with them yourself without "letting them out" (translation: offloading them on others).

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    • It simply means don't bottle it up. Tell others what's going on and how it makes you feel. It's an important and necessary step for healing.

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    • It's a personality type. I am this way. I don't bother other people until they come to me for help.
      If you feel manipulated or guilty, that's your problem frankly. That has no bearing on the earnesty of their request for assistance. When unintentional, it's considered influence. When intentional, that is when it becomes manipulation.
      If they come to you, genuinely wanting your personal help, you can either do the right thing and help them, or you can feel guilty and turn your back on them. That's what it ultimately comes down to.

      It seems we won't agree on anything here, so I think it best to stop here. Have a great day and I hope people around you know wether or not they can confide in you or not.

    • The internet is a place to communicate with other people and express yourself.

  • I agree with @Artification, you should make this a MyTake article

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  • Literally just dealt with this cutting ties with a narcissist who I was best friends with for 8 years. It's emotionally draining. I feel you

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    • I hope you find better people to be friends with, I relate to having a narcissistic friend as well and you're right it is emotionally draining but I hope on the journey to make new friends, you find better ones. I wish you best of luck.

    • Thank you. I really appreciate that

  • Only men can gaslight it seems

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  • Okay. What's your question again?

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  • What is gas-lighting?

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    • When someone tries to manipulate you into thinking you're less than what you are and crazy. It's a physchologist thing that narcissist do.

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    • So the short term definition is called being a douche bag.

    • I believe it's more common among women. Men guard themselves because they want to guard their egos. Women tend to be more emotional in relationships which can give the gaslighter a higher hand. They'll never give the woman the acceptance and validation she wants because it's a tactic used to break her. Most men wouldn't care

  • Excellently said!

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  • what the hell is gaslighting in terms of dating?

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    • When someone tries to lower your self esteem/bring you down. Most people believe they're crazy when being gas lighted because the gaslighter uses physchology to manipulate the person and gain control.

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    • Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that seeks to sow seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or in members of a targeted group, making them question their own memory, perception, and sanity. Using persistent denial, misdirection, contradiction, and lying, it attempts to destabilize the victim and delegitimize the victim's belief.

      Instances may range from the denial by an abuser that previous abusive incidents ever occurred up to the staging of bizarre events by the abuser with the intention of disorienting the victim. The term owes its origin to the 1938 Patrick Hamilton play Gaslight and its 1940 and 1944 film adaptations.

    • Unfortunately I feel as though this happens to me daily.

  • Where is the question

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  • Who hurt you?

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What Girls Said 6

  • ... Okay, so, is this a question or a memo? I'm confused.

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  • Dont forget about w#ores and gold diggers. Dont expect a prince when you dont even know how to cook.

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  • I’ve never heard of a man making a woman give him her money, car etc. Always the opposite.

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    • Many men actually take women's carane money too... Male gold digger are actually more dangerous and will beat/kill women for not giving them things.

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    • Bye bitch. Your opinion is irrelevant and unwanted you busted hoe.

    • Lmaoo you don’t even know me Instagram thug, you’re obviously not real smart (maybe you’re slow) I don't know but me and many others would appreciate if you stop spreading bs. You’re mad that a dude played tf out of you. So aren’t u the busted hoe? 🤔

  • Love this.

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  • Um nice article. Very kewl.

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  • I absolutely love this ❤

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