How do I confront a guy I am pretty much in a relationship with about hiding the fact he is online dating?

Well - funny history here. I met a guy last year on an online dating site, and we started spending a lot of time together. We became close friends, but realized that we liked each other. We've done 'the deed', several times - and act like a couple especially when we're alone.

I've spoken to him a few times about being a couple, yet he says that being a couple is going to interrupt with his future plans. He says that he's happy with the way things are between us, and that I am exactly his type of girl, but he's not ready for commitment. It's been a year...surely by now he would know?

Thing is, we live under the same roof - so we see each other pretty much all the time. This doesn't make things easy. Not so long ago, I found out that he's registered on another dating site, and I curiously looked at his profile - funnily enough, everything he's described there is exactly me.

It's insulting to my intelligence and to me as a person that he is doing this behind my back, as I would much prefer his honesty and him to tell me that we shouldn't be fooling around anymore because he wants to meet new people. Thing is, we are so close to each other and every time I feel like confronting him, I can't. Plus it's like an invasion to his privacy.

I am angry, confused but still stupidly hope that he values me more. Am I really being a fool and how do I get out of it? I want to tell him I know, and that he doesn't have to hide things from me but it might make things awkward.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • As invasion of privacy is never a good thing. There wouldn't be a need for such a thing to happen if there wasn't doubt caused by the other party. Especially when the breach of honesty has be done.

    He is obviously just having his run with you. While either attempting to find another person to add to his game, or just someone to replace you with. Even though you two aren't in anything serious. After your initial conversations you would know if that person is someone you want to commit to. I'm surprised he has stretched it out this far with you. But, you fall for it because of the attraction you have to him. In which clouds your better judgement. Or because of insecurities you may have.

    Yes, you're being a fool. And full acknowledgement to yourself should be enough of a way for you to get out of it without any doubt within yourself.


What Girls Said 1

  • i would give him the cold shoulder for a few days...weeks...until he gets it. but you get tired of him just tell him that your tired of how he is treating you.

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