Still no second date?

Ever since this guy and I met online, we've been texting/talking on the phone every single day. He showed huge interest in me. Then we had our first date a week ago and it was awesome. And we had sex. Nothing really changed after that, he continued calling me every day and giving me attention. He does drop small hints about seeing each other again, but nothing concrete. I don't want to flat out ask him because I was the one who kinda initiated the first date, and well, I slept with him on that same date. He knows I'm looking for a relationship, he said he feels the same. Because of my horrible experience with men, I'd have no second thought about him not being interested in me since he's still not asking for a second date. But then again, why the constant messaging and phone calls? I almost never initiate it, it's all him. What's up with him?

P. S. We are a little apart by distance, but nothing major, only 45 miles. We talked about that in the beginning and he said that for him that's still a big distance and that he's not sure if he could do a relationship like that. But then he added that it's probably worth it with the right person.


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What Guys Said 1

  • As dumb as it sounds, it's probably the distance, especially if he is Kind of lazy about some Things.

    Don't be afraid to say something like, "So when are you going to ask me out on a second date" or "Where will you take me on our next date?".

    • If I ask him that, then I'd be initiating it again... And I really want to avoid that. It's not that I have a problem with taking a lead sometimes, it's just that I want us to make effort equally. Maybe it sounds stupid but me initiating it again would make me feel less wanted, like degrading my femininity. Sure, It feels good when a guy reciprocates my advances, but til some point it starts feeling kind of biologically wrong. So yeah, I think I will sit this one out and see if he steps in. Hopefully it won't take him too long because I might move on.

    • I understand you're reasoning, but sometimes when you want something, you Need to take the bull by the Horns, especially when the other Option is moving on. If you do go on a second date with him, be sure to indicate that this bothered you, but of Course explain it differently, although I fully understand your reasoning.

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