We both quit July 31 and it’s hard. I get it. We were there for each other at any hour if we felt like we were going to lapse or were having a craving. We talked the other through it.
Thursday, I congratulated him on making it a month, and his response was not to remind him of timelines because he’s taking it one day at a time. I apologized. Last night, I was going through pics we’ve sent each other and came across one of an accident he sent me on Wednesday on his way him. I didn’t notice it when he sent it to me but noticed last night he had a cigarette in his hand.
I asked him last night if he’s smoking again and reminded him I meant it when I said I was there for him and still proud of him for trying, that I’ll still have his back when he decides to try again. He’s refused to answer me texts or calls since I confronted him.
I’m not even mad that he’s smoking again, but I’m pissed that he hid it from me. It’s something huge and I was so proud of him, but I don’t understand why he doesn’t trust me anymore to come to me about things like that. About how he was craving, how he lapsed.
It makes me wonder what else he’s hiding from me.
It’s been over 12 hours and still no response from him. Which is just fueling the thoughts about what else he’s hiding from me. I’m pissed now that he’s avoiding that talk.
Could you trust someone after they hid something so big?
The card went on to say I wish him the best in life if he chooses to walk away from the friendship, otherwise I’ll still be there for him 100% unconditionally and without judgement should he chose to reach out. That I know he’s strong and I’m still behind him.
Most Helpful Guys
he's probably ashamed. I mean... Something like this. It's a tough call. It's not a terrible lie. But I is a lie. Then again if he didn't see you as close enough he might have felt he didn't owe it to you to tell you. But then again if he'd lie about this. That's a tough one. Is he trustworthy otherwise? What if he was just holding It? Do you smell cigs on him during the day. I quit smoking about 2 years ago. It ain't easy. Especially of shtf.
I know a lady who was engaged to a guy for about a year. When she asked when they were finally going to get married, he at that point said he needed to finally divorce his wife first. Geeschhh, he waits THAT long to tell her he never got divorced? I don't think she trusted him with anything after that.
I know another lady who got married I think around the age of 40. About 5 years into their marriage she finds out her husband actually had a son. That's a bit much to overlook telling your wife... Needless to say she's getting divorced but not just over that.
Most Helpful Girl
I couldn't. White lies can be over anything and eventually lead to big lies.
Also, why is he not answering you? Suspicious.