Boyfriend won't stop talking about good things his ex did?

Ok, I have been a lurker here for a while but decided to make an account. Ugh... sucks my first question is like this. Seriously though.

Girls. Ever had to deal with this? What did you do?

Guys. Why would a guy do that?
Updates:
Thank you 😊 I actually did and he said the he's going to stop. So we'll see I guess
Thank you everyone for being so helpful. I followed a lot of your advice and I think it helped. He said he is going to stop. You're all great!

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Most Helpful Guy

  • He wants to make himself comfortable in a relationship in order to know what to expect from you. So for example, if he talked about how his girlfriend used to give him orange juice when he wakes up he is trying to give you a hint that he wants the same. Probably a bit of a dick move because that means that he never really forgot his previous relationship. I advice to watch out for that because if you do too much he might start using that as an excuse to do what he wants with you.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • it doesn't sound like he's fully over her. When did you two get together? when did he and she break up?

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    • We got together about 3 months ago and they broke up about a year ago

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    • Occasionally yes. He's mostly really sweet.

    • Just the fact that he mentions his ex at all gives me concerns that he’s not fully over her. I would ask him him point blank why he does this. Not argumentatively but just matter of fact. Maybe he doesn’t recognize this fault. and if he’s mostly sweet as you say, he may have an explainstion that puts you at ease.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 17

  • This is totally wrong. He shouldn't even talk mention about her good or not. It was in past and disrespect to you. If he was missing her that much, he would have stayed with her.

    You are someone totally new and no matter how much you are better or not, it must have no value, since you are someone different. You are not worthy to be judged by his past either. If something bad happened in his past, he cannot make you suffer from it, not compare you to anything either.

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    • I am glad to see he realized how it is important and how much valuable you are.

  • It's called 'dread'. Usually it backfires. Dump his ass, he still wants her so you're just the backup plan for now. What's yours?

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  • I'm going to assume they are good things his ex is doing? If this is the case he probably feels that you are lacking in those areas. If it is just information that isn't always good or bad then he may not be over her.

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  • Depends on what he's saying. "Won't stop" makes it sound like is all the time. I would go with he's not over her. Thinking about her all the time and saying how good she was is weird. I would guess there is some kind of motive behind it.

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  • Tell him if she is so great he should go back to her. Get rid of this guy you deserve better

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  • thats a weird thing to do, if she was so great why isn't he together with her anymore? πŸ˜„ Id talk to him about it, it can seriously mess up a relationship in the long run.

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  • Your should just say to him, "hey look I like you, HOWEVER, if you can't get over this idiotic infatuation you have with you ex then it IS over. So if your so called ex is SO great go back to her, but remember do NOT come back to me"

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    • I've thought about it. But I don't want to put down ultimatums

    • It's up to you, but I would. by the way you are NOT give him a ultimatum you are giving him a choice, big difference.

  • When i bring up my ex its always because id wanna tell the current girlfriend she's better than the ex. But im single 😐

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  • He's giving you the ultimate disrespect. He's a twatwaffleand you need to dump him for someone who treat as you right

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  • He is attempting to undermine your confidence within yourself to minipulate you to be more like exy ask him if she is so great whats he doing in your bed

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  • They just wanna be happy.
    It's not always boys to face side effects

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  • Sexually things

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  • I need more context to give an opinion.

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  • Maybe he shouldn't be dating then at this time

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  • What is the man even saying to piss you off

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  • Do what? Talk to my girl about my ex?

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  • So you get insecure when he tells about his ex?

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What Girls Said 5

  • Say I don't want to hear it. If he does it again say,, If you think she's so great you don't need to be with me you need to be with her and leave or hang up

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    • I'm going to do that next time. Thank you!

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    • You're smart and I really appreciate it! πŸ€—

  • I assume people who do this are trying to get their woman to try harder.

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    • That makes sense. Thank you. That just made me think, you think its probable that his ex didn't actually do those things and he is just saying that to make me try harder? Or is it more likely that she really did?

      Mostly like typical stuff like doing little things for him, some of it is sexual too though.

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    • You need to call him out, in my opinion, and ask him if he would like it if you did something like talk about how your ex's dick was bigger or some shit.

  • Look closely enough, you can see my left nipple

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  • He either hasn't moved on or just likes to crib about the past to get sympathy.

    Or he's just being nostalgic

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    • Yeah could be. How long had it been going on for you?

    • First two guys I were with didn't have a girlfriend before.

      The guy I'm dating now does mention her occasionally- good and bad.
      But then I mention my exes too so we're even.

  • This never happened to me. Sorry.

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