Is being shy as a guy a turnoff?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes confidence is attractive but when I guy is shy at first it draws girls in because we can see that they aren’t super arrogant which is a huge turn OFF. As girls we love to feel good about ourselves, so if a guy makes us feel unworthy, it will not end in those two being together. Shy guys are usually the good ones.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Think about it this way. That girl you're trying to get. Has hella other dudes in her dms that aren't shy. So why she gonna choose you. Yeah you can still get the girl but you're putting yourself at an unnecessary disadvantage. Especially since as guys we usually have to make the first move

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What Girls Said 42

  • It is for me, i'm attracted to confidence.

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  • No, being shy is actually kinda cute in my experience. Sometimes being shy can come with character flaws and make the shyness seem like an unattractive trait. My boyfriend is shy, and when he first took an intrest in me he was pretty shy and I took it as him really caring so it made me much more interested. He was just a little less shy than me though, if he was we never would have talked since I approach no one.

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    • I wish other girls were like you.

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    • That's just sad.

  • nahh it's not... I don't know why i find it cute.. my boyfriend's shy... he used to be very shy when we first started talking... but as we got closer he changed... because of this i know that he genuinely likes me... cause he does not talk a lot to other girls that much and he's not as close to other people as we are (except for his guy friends)...

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  • No, it's not a "turn off", it just depends on the person and who they can click with. It just sucks when someone may try to have a conversation with him, and he seems uninterested because he's not keeping it going. But usually if a person who's shy is comfortable and finds someone who they can click well with, they become very outgoing and talkative with that someone.

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  • I don't like shy guys, I really don't.
    And you know, sometimes it becomes annoying when I keep on asking them questions and all he says is, "ok.", "Yeah."
    Fuck it.

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  • I personally prefer less shy guys because I'm really shy, I need someone who will make the first move and help bring me out of my shell. I don't think it's a turn off for people though, as long as you become less shy around them most people don't mind at all if you're shy at first.

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  • Not for me but I do find that they are treated horribly by girls. Not always but just what I've noticed.

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  • i’ve always been drawn to the confident but quiet type. the type of shy that’s NOT attractive is the type who you try to talk to and they answer just what u asked with nothing back to go off of so it feels like an interrogation.

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  • I find shy guys a turn off. I'm a hypocrite but I'm not TOO shy, there are just some social stunts that I will not do. I like guys who are confident and extroverted while I'm insecure and introverted

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    • So you expect that guys should accept you for being insecure while you judge them for theirs? what a fucking joke you are. saying "I'm a hypocrite" doesn't make it better, because you're aware of what your doing and you still do it anyway.

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    • But she says shy guys are a turn off. She makes it sound like a switch to be turned on or off, but it really doesn't work that way. In reality, she always disliked shy guys. Not because of anything they did, but because that's her preference. So no, she isn't a hypocrite.

    • @glenns how does that make it better that she judges guys based on something she embodies her self? that doesn't sound healthy

  • I’m shy so, if he was also shy we’d never get anything done.
    Like ordering at restaurants would take 10 years lmao.

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  • Shy guys are cute. I love it when they smile a little and blush. Absolutely adorable 😍💞😊

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  • Yeah, it is a huge turn off. I am a talkative and argumentative person, and most of all, I am a person who needs to be surrounded by a crowd. I expect my partner to be the same.

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  • Nah, I’m shy myself so I think a guy who’s also shy is actually a turn on.

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  • No, not at all. Instead, shy guys appear to be more attractive to me. Specially the smile , that shy one.

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  • No it can be cute as long as it's not to an extreme like never wanting to talk to her or be with her cause you're nervous

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  • I like shy. But not too shy to the point where they can't even have a conversation

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  • Depends. Some shy guys are friggin’ cute. As long as he is not shy in the bedroom, I don’t care :-D

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  • Not a turn off, but I wouldn’t able to decipher his feelings

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  • It's not that it's a turn off, but if a guy doesn't show any kind of interest then us girls just won't know you are interested.

    I've liked shy guys before, but I never figured out they were shy until it was too late. If a guy seems kind of shy and I like him I'll hit on him and flirt with him and show him that I like him, but if he never flirts back and doesn't make a move, it makes us think they don't like us. So it's happened twice where I've moved on after a few months of flirting with a guy, and then I find out AFTER I've moved on that they really liked me... it's just silly really... cus it's really too late by the time I've moved on to someone else.

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  • not exactly it depends on that guy, some guys are shy but their behaviour and way of speaking is attractive.

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  • No, it gives me the balls to be more foreword. I’m shy if I stay shy we wouldn’t grow.

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  • Everyone loves shy girls, but shy guys aren't as well received

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  • The guy I’m seeing is shy and it’s not cuz I can just talk and talk and talk

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  • If it lasts more than a certain amount of time then yes. But in the beginning no I think it's cute.

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  • No i love shy guys

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  • For shy people, like me, it is adorable.

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  • Nope

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  • Shy guy's are cute so no

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  • Depends how shy , but for the most part no.

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  • No it is not.

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What Guys Said 33

  • In some cases, the Girls is so attracted to him, it doesn't matter. In others, being a Little bit shy is OK, but not a lot.

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  • Don't confuse shy with introversion. They're two different things.
    And develop your social skills - they are learned. You'll need to get outside yourself if you want to get the girl.

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  • I'm personally not interested in any sort of relationship... but from what I can gather, no, most girls don't really like shy guys.

    Most girls want a super outgoing, confident guy who makes a lot of jokes and can take them to places... and most shy guy, are, well... not exactly that.

    I'm a shy guy myself, so I'm in the same boat.

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  • yes it is. female attraction revolves around dominance. dominance through masculinity, through being more rich than her, more rational and emotionally stable, being the price for their chase and never the hunter etc.
    whoever says the opposite is lying..

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  • A shy guy will never get “Grade A” pussy. He’ll be relegated beta, or even worse, omega status where at best case he’ll find a washed up 5 in her mid-30’s who will marry him and bleed him dry of money.

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  • If you're way too shy, it is. Girls don't generally start talking to guys, it is you who should be doing it. Then just go with the flow.

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  • Girls hate shy guys take it from me I've been extremely shy my whole life and what shy means is boring and uniteresting and girls do not like that, if one tells you "i dont mind shy guys" is a lierband probably gonna talk shit behind your back.

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  • A little bit of shyness may not be but if you’re but extremely shy then yes.

    Physical attraction is part of it but personality and being able to hold a conversation is an even bigger part.

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  • It's a turn off to most women, including those who say they like shy guys. I used to be extremely shy, and I knew girls who said they liked shy guys. They also said that I was good looking, funny, sweet. Guess how many of those girls I ended up dating? That's right - zero. Guess how many shy guys they ended up dating? Same again.

    I don't know if they actually think that or if they're just being nice, but it's not true either way. You have to work on eliminating the shyness and gaining confidence if you want to attract women.

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  • Must be... women dont like passive aggressiveness either, yeah I've some interactions with women on here that think I was that way. I'm shy introverted. Less drama that way. Hmmm.

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  • Its only a turnoff if you are ugly.
    If you look good, girls will think you are "mysterious".

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  • It certainly restricts a guy. Find a self help group and become a social butterfly.

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  • No moreso than in any gender - A shy person might miss out by being quiet rather than a turn off though some loud people can't handle shy people

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  • Girls dont like shy guys. They want guys that will do all the job of approaching and put all effort so they don't have to do anything, just sit back.

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  • If you're good looking or just have an innocent/friendly aura, it's not.

    If you're not good looking and come off as a weirdo/creep then yes.

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  • Not a turn off (but sometimes) but it's useless I guess
    You can't initiate conversations

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  • No its more like an inability. It's like not being able to fix a car.

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  • As a bi guy, yeah, they're a turnoff. Shy people are so boring in general.

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  • Shy guys sometimes cares more. Straight forward guys can get boring later on.

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  • Yes and no, a bit she is cute but being too shy that it becomes hard work gets boring very quickly.

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  • The answer is No

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  • Yes, you need to be a confident jerk
    FACT

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  • As a bi guy I find them cute. Precious.

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  • Most women don't like it too much I think

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  • No I like shy girls

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    • Of course you do because men like to be in control and have power. Shyness is a sign of weakness and men like to feel like they can be the protector while women are less interested in a shy man.

    • That's really sad coz I'm bit shy

  • Not for me

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  • yes women love loud rich men

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  • Yes women like a confident alpha male

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  • I don't hope so ;-;

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  • I've always found girls to be turned off by shy guys. They may like them, friend them, try dating them even... but if he remains shy they inevitably get turned off and leave.

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