Do you think someone can find happiness staying single forever? Particularly a woman?

I've been hurt. So badly by someone I never thought would hurt me. Now, I know my standards are high after this relationship but they’re only in place because I can’t picture myself trusting a man if he didn’t meet these new impossible standards.
i don’t hate men. I love men and understand them. I just don’t want one anymore and don’t believe I ever will.
Do you think that a fulfilling career and good friends can keep me happy? I don’t want to be lonely, but I’d feel lonely in a relationship anyway.

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Most Helpful Guys

  • I think someone can be single and be a happy person.

    Flip side is... as much as I hate to admit it... I think there might not be any greater joy on earth than finding that special person. Think about the story of Adam and Eve. God created man and was friends with him, and would talk with him... but it wasn't enough. God himself decided that Adam, with the Garden of Eden, able to walk and talk with God, wasn't enough.

    finedayquote.com/.../...or-the-man-to-be-alone.jpg

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Most Helpful Girls

  • First you need to be happy on your own. If you can’t be happy alone how can you be happy when your with someone? I’ve been single for almost 2 years after a 7 year relationship and I’m ok with that. I’d rather be alone then in a relationship I’m not happy in, I don’t “Need” somebody to be complete. Also you can’t hold what your past relationships have brought over the heads of those your with in that time, don’t punish the men your with for the issues the men you were once with did to you, why’re not all that way. If you still have faith in men then why are you asking this question? Are there times of loneliness? Absolutely, but I’m ok with that for myself. I will keep living my life and after the relationship I’ve been in my standards are high and I’ll never settle for anything less than anything because I know what I have to offer a relationship and with that being said, things will work out. I will not be alone forever but the right man will come when I’m not looking for it but as I’m living my life doing me, and not expecting it. Have faith, it’ll all work out, even though at the time it may not feel like it!

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  • I can never understand why people think happiness can be found in relationships when there are countless ways to make yourself happy. I mean, if a person thinks that their relationship makes them happy then good for them, doesn’t mean everyone’s gonna have the same.

    I just don’t believe that we should ever rely on a partner for happiness. I think happiness is something we have to find on our own. Sometimes relationships don’t really cure loneliness, especially when you’ve felt lonely for nearly your whole life, been through crappy relationships, traumatic experiences, etc.

    But I guess everyone has their own definition of happiness, I’ve been in relationship before and I did enjoy them but when they came to an end, of course I was upset but I decided to focus on my own being and do things that I enjoy. I don’t really remember when’s the last time I yearned for a relationship. I’m still happy with my hobbies, my passion, etc. Maybe this can be the same for you

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    • perfectly well said!! our lives and happiness doesn't depend on other people! we have to learn to love ourselves first and be strong and independent. if someone wants to come along for the journey then great! but if not it won't be a problem because you will be happy either way :)

    • Show All
    • @ShesAmerican tbh i think the whole love and happiness thing is blown way out of proportion and made into a bigger deal than it really is by hollywood and romance movies. in my opinion love cannot exist because the idea of love is way to ideal and perfect and people are only human and nowhere near perfect. people make mistakes and change their minds and change into different people so to put all your happiness on a single person is crazy and you are guaranteed to be let down or betrayed

    • @vald9inches To me love does exist. I think love still has its purpose, I just think people don’t know how love works or how to love a person exactly. It’s a big responsibility and not a lot of people know how to handle the responsibility. I just don’t see the point of constantly chasing for it when you have other things to focus on like your well-being and your passion, just wait for the time to come because nobody is sure what the future holds

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 66

  • You're young- you have plenty of time to do things by yourself and later meet The One.

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  • What I'm about to say is real. I don't give a shit what anyone thinks, so down vote me if you'd like.

    Can women find happiness staying single forever? Yes. Unfortunately, A LOT of women will have to learn to find happiness, because many will be single forever.

    We live in a time period where a lot of women are more single than any time before. I am closing in on 30 (I'm in a relationship), but I know many females from work and my persona life who are in their late 30s, early 4os and they have no kids and haven't been in a relationship in many, many years.

    Women these days have to deal with being single, because they expect too much out of a man. They want a perfect man in an imperfect world. There is no such thing as perfect, but many women try to find that perfect man and will dump a man for simple flaws. The number one rule in a relationship is to accept your partner for all their flaws, but a lot of women don't want a man with flaws.

    As such, a lot of women put themselves in a box and all the potential men they could be dating are outside that box and aren't allowed in. As a result, a lot of women stay single for years to come because they are way too picky.

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  • Never say never. But there's also no hurry just don't keep yourself closed off to the possibility. If you feel lonely in a relationship you clearly weren't with the right person. I've always been single. And i've always been relatively happy. But it hasn't been completely by choice that i've been single. And i have no desire to be single forever. but i'd rather be single for the right reasons than in a relationship for the wrong ones.

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  • You'd better learn how to be happy living alone. Butt hurt women have been walking out of their marriages in droves over the past 40 years, never to marry again. Many of today's men are now seeing how this pattern developed and and are becoming very reluctant to commit to marriage. The divorced, single and over 40 crowd is now the majority. Adapt or die of heartbreak. Personally, I love and trust my cats more than any human being that I know.

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  • The only people who don't mind dying alone are asexuals or hookup types. Clearly you don't want to die alone so no, you will certainly not be happy single forever.
    Yes, the career and friends and family are nice and all, but the fact that you even post this at all shows that you want the special someone.
    Maybe you can be happy single now, but eventually you'll get sick of it.

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    • Technically, more often than not people dying alone either way. Unless they die together with their spouse/partner/significant other, etc. in a car crash, a plane crash, or some other great cataclysmic disaster, like a massive earthquake, a tsunami, maybe even from a volcano. Because rarely do they ever "DIE AT THE SAME TIME", thus somebody is still gonna be left behind on their own, to grieve over the loss of the other.

  • It's okay to be alone
    Not okay to be lonely, it sucks
    Career will fill only so much of your time and energy with only a little satisfaction. Good friends can make you smile and possibly laugh, but at the end of the night, you are still alone.
    Try not to judge every man by the actions of one or two. You don't have to commit after one or two dates. You can date more than one person at a time, sort of a weeding out process.

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  • I think woman are the least likely to stay happy without a relationship. Thats already a hard thing to do for men, but for women...
    You can stay content without a man, but truly happy? Kinda doubt it.

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  • Many women have been single their entire lives, and have had fulfilling, happy lives. I know some women who are single, and clearly enjoy life.

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    • Just for that. Gimme a high five bro! Are you hearing and reading this Pink Anon? Because I sure hope you read and see this one clearly. As I said, the "happiness" state is really coming from within ourselves, not from what others can provide us with, at least we can't solely rely on somebody else to keep us "happy" and make us feel "happy". Because they may not always be around you forever, and once they're gone, well then, there goes your "happiness" too.

  • I'd say that probably not forever, eventually people will want to pair off and settle down and probably have a kid or two. It's what we're biologically programmed to do.

    I think that people can be happy and single at points though. Like I am currently not wanting a relationship for my own reasons but this is also something that people in relationships or those who can't not be in a relationship will ever understand.

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  • I'd say do what you want, no one and nothing will make you happier than you can or will. happiness comes from within. Your friends, your career, and mainly yourself will keep you happy.
    Don't seek a relationship or get involved in one until your ready to open that door again and allow a man to hopefully not hurt you.

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  • Life is full of hardship and heartbreak. You need to find the support to keep on keeping on instead of giving up on somthing.

    I personally am not happy at all and have never had a romantic relationship, but somehow with the support of a couple good friends I keep on hoping things will get better.

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  • Many men are finding out that they can be perfectly fine being single. Being a bachelor for the remainder of their days brings peace on contentment. Kinda our primal state anyways. Where the primal state for women is pair bonding.

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    • Exactly although men are not designed to abandon the women they sleep with, they are biologically related to these women after sex and are suppose to marry each one, it’s even in the Bible.

  • Everyone needs to love spending time with themselves first and foremost. Once one is able to spend time with yourself and love yourself, being single is a breeze. Some personalities are better suited to the single life, as well. So absolutely, yes.

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  • You've met the wrong kind of man. Assholes like these are the reason why good guys don't get good girls because they break hearts and causes girls to raise standard.

    There is always a right guy around you. Instead of raising standards, take time before you open up about your secrets. Make sure you can trust this guy.

    I believe if you have a strong mind and strong heart, you can stay single.
    But the point of life is to find a yang for your yin.

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  • Only if you WANT to be single forever. If you feel like you HAVE to be single so no one will hurt you, probably not.

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  • You heal in time and will find someone better. Tbh I have been torn by the girl I thought was the one that I can't compare anyone to her I know it would be very hard to find someone new but love is a funny thing and you sometimes fall in love with someone that is lower standard but still is for you. Have you broke up with them?

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  • Not truly... Not having someone who cares for you, nobody to care for. The lack of intimacy and compassion would eventually leave you feeling empty and un-accomplished

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  • "fulfilling career and good friends can keep me happy?" you certainly can substitute into a void with that to some extent. Forgetting about relationships for the moment, too high of expectations in life is a setup for a letdown. Some build up these grandiose goals and perceptions in life just to have the carpet pulled out in reality. The degree of this mismatch between standards/goals/perception and reality is proportional to that individual’s lack of happiness or suffering. I see all too often the simplest people are the happiest. So, it is possible that you life expectation’s could also leave you hurt in general when all comes to fruition even in the absence of a man.

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  • I think you just need to be brave and face the problem I'm sure there are men who would care for you but if you don't give then a chance they won't be able to.

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  • they will make you happy but still you will need a life partner. you'll find the suitable partner when time comes

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    • If she reserve her virginity, doesn’t attend college and remains feminine, finding a husband young, which for a woman is under 25.

  • Yes you can be very happy. You can meet all kinds of dudes and enjoy short term relationships. You would never limit yourself on what you really want to do.

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  • you're a woman you dont need to stay single forever. realtionships are only hard for men. Get out there an work on it girl i mean you have a vagina so dating is meant to be easy for you

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  • it's possible but it highly depends on you

    if you met the right one who cares for you as they should then I would advise you that sure stay single but don't close off completely, cos in a couple of years you may feel that pain of loneliness and wish you had someone, but would be frustrated about where you'd be at...
    keep an open mind about if someone does come along, as there are still good people out there and if you completely shut off
    a career and good friends will only get you so far... the urge to end that lonely feeling could become overwhelming

    either way I hope you find peace and happiness in whatever your life brings

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  • Yes you can but the younger you are, the harder it is. Older people can do it easier because they have already had their fun. You are too young to want to be single.

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  • Maybe not any woman. Probably a nan... but happiness doesn't exist with others. It exists within outselves

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  • No. Being single isn't normal and God didn't designed that way.

    A man needs his woman and a woman needs her man to feel completed.

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  • Standards? Is your happiness limited by standards? You have to move on or you will be unhappy. One day you will change your mind but you will be too late. Get out , search and choose carefully.

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  • Yes, I certainly feel so. I'm 34 and Single, and I'm planning to stay single forever. Dating and fun is Ok, but basically I don't feel the requirement of marriage.

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  • Sorry for your pain. The thing is you need to be happy and love yourself before you have a relationship. The thing is Everytime you trust you leave yourself open to be betrayed it sucks but that's life. Life is hard and unfair but that's ok because if it were fair all the shit that happened would be on you and personally I could not bare that burden so I now take great comfort in the general hostility of the universe. Eventually you will meet someone worthy of your trust loyalty and affection. I wish you well and all the love and happiness you can handle

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  • There's no such thing as happiness so you're literally looking for a thing that doesn't exist , what exist is satisfaction that's hard to come by if you're old and alone

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    36

What Girls Said 32

  • Yes... a woman can live single and still be happy. But i never close the doors for another man to come into my life... i have high standards too, but i can be flexible and see what happens. I am extremely up front with man specially if they want a boyfriend and girlfriend relationship... i lay it out front, if they dont like it then its not meant to be, and if it works then we both work hard on building up the relationship in a healthy way. Yes i been hurt so badly that this man who hurt me made a whole in me, but now this whole i self sooth it and fix my broken wing, and now i know i can fly more stronger than i was when i was with my ex... i dont dwell on the hurt anymore bc i know it east at my sweet life i have in front of me, i dwell on things i know i can do and i am better than my ex. I am richer and i am happier, and that is what makes me strongly believe that not all man are going to be like my ex. Just bc one asshole hurt me bad, it doesn't mean the next is going to be thesame, yes i am careful who i choose and why, i get to know them first before accepting them into a relationship, then i make my own mind wether i want to pursue the guy further or just let it go. But please dont close the doors on man, its hard right now, but let you heal first and do things for you for a while, then when you know your ok and ready, you'll be happier and stronger than ever... trust me i though i was going to not be with anyone, now i think i am ready and its good. I meet already lots of cool man and they are nothing like my ex, some of them dont meet my standards but thats the beauty of looking around, and thesame goes for man too. So you come first, then guys, and you are still very young, and you need your time to heal first. All the best in what you choose. Being single is awesome!! Hugs. X

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  • I believe a person can be content and generally happy being single all their life , because not everyone's happiness depends on being in a relationship. However, I do believe they'll long to have someone to share their life with. They'll crave love and affection, but that doesn't necessarily mean they aren't or can't be happy.

    Happiness is not a permanent state. Very few people are happy in all aspects of their life. Even those in loving happy relationships can still feel unhappy in life

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    • But we human are made in a nature that is both genders are attracted to each others and I think even if you are feeling satisfied and happy being single there would still something missing in your life you wish to have.

    • @egykimo

      That doesn't mean a person will always be unhappy. Everyone has different mindsets , different life experiences, and different strengths of character. So some people can be truly happy being single their entire life

      . If a person can never find happiness being single that's a reflection of their character. It has nothing to do with human instinct or human nature. Because not all people's happiness depends on being in a relationship

  • The only possible way I found, is to stay self-reliance, to trust yourself to take care of yourself and the ability to make yourself happy , and have much lower expectations on people. Standards are important, but I feel the standard should be communicated well , even if so, a lot of people aren't willing/able to fit the standards, then you just keep searching.

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  • Yes and no. You can be happy but a part of you will always wish to have a partner. I’m happy I’m single because I’m dodging all the immature pricks and don’t see myself dating anytime soon but I do want someone I can grow old with.
    I guess you just ah e to wait for someone that will meet your standards and in the meantime just enjoy your life I guess.

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  • It completely depends on you. Never stop doing good things and spend time with your loved ones, you shouldn't be sad then. I wish to get married but if I end up being single I do have plans for that 😂 particularly I wanna adopt kids and raise them with all my love and attention ❤ seeing them growing up to becoming healthy and happy will make me happy then 🙈

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  • Totally. In fact, a lot of women are happier when they're single; there's not a lot of drama, you don't have someone trying to control you, you don't have to wonder if he's being faithful to you or not, etc.

    It's great to have a man in your life but a lot of guys don't act like real men and they ultimately break your heart. If you can't find a real man in your life, please don't feel bad. There may not be a lot of real out there, I'm sad to say. But it's important for us to have a full and rich life anyway - doing things that make us happy. :)
    P. S. A dog is an excellent companion; they're loving, giving, caring, etc. - things we'd also like in a man. ;)

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    • ... There may not be a lot of real men... {I'm sorry we can't edit on this otherwise fabulous website.}
      P. P. S. You may not want to be in a relationship now, and that's perfectly normal. You're in pain and your wounds are fresh and deep. But please leave yourself open to the possibility that you might find someone who will treat you right, in the future. ;)

  • I think a fulfilling career and good friends can keep you happy. just make friends and be good to everyone. in your tough times your true ones will stay with you and let others go. dont force yourself into any relationships if it does not truly make happy

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  • Twenty years ago I turned down a number of offers for my hand in marriage, one in particular. My opting to stay single and live independently was a bad decision, and now, at 46, I find it very difficult to adjust to a full-time partner in my home. And it can be very lonely.

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  • I am in the same situation, and yes,, i feel like i have lost this BIG idea of love, i would rather be alone,, you can read my last question to know what i mean :)

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  • Well you could as long as you have really close (female) friends for emotional support. A soulmate doesn't have to be a romantic partner, you know.

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  • I think so you can live single forever as long as you have good friends, family around you. You don’t really need a man in life for your own happiness. I have read that we should choose a partner if we think they really need for our life.

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  • Happiness doesn't have to involve you having a partner, it involves you, you can be in that a
    Amazing relationship but still feel sad or depressed, so you can surround yourself by a circle of friends that you love, hang with them, and take care of your beauty, your career, refresh your life.

    And don't say that you plan on staying single forever, you don't want what the future is holding, you may find that man who would be faithful with you and loves you dearly and would match your standards, just be optimistic and care for yourself.

    It was an experiment, and it failed, you have to recover from it, and do your best to change all the negatives it left into positivities that will make you stronger and more independent.

    Stand infront of the mirror and tell yourself, you are strong, you can be successful, you don't need a man to complete your happiness! But, if a loving man came a long, then you shouldn't hate him or shut him out!

    Wish you all the luck and love in your life ❤

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  • I think you can but sadly women over and over again are reminded by family, friends, media how they are somehow unable to be single. That what defines her is a male. Constant questions about your relationship status or why you are still single. Women are much more reminded of their need to be with a man, when with all honesty, a woman can be happy, be independent and live a rich life without a man by her side. But how will everyone around make you feel? They will pity you or think something is wrong with you.

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  • If they are ready to watch their friends leave them behind having children, getting married etc.

    OR willing to leave those friends.

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  • I have single women family and friends that are happy and satisfied on their own. So yes, you could probably be perfectly content without a man.

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  • Everyone's different. Some may be able to live a single life, some may not. Maybe it's just the sense of freedom - not being tied down to only one person.

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  • I couldn’t. I need someone to cuddle with and to hold me in his arms :)

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  • Yes you can. A strong bond to family and friends will satify your needs

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  • Temporary happiness, there'll always be something that's missing

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  • I think that if you have a full filling life you would vs very happy being single.

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  • Yes. You don’t need a partner to enjoy your life. Make new friends, go out more. Do your makeup, get dressed up and gain genuine confidence! The best part for me of being single was just going out, meeting new people and having all these potential partners but choosing to stay single! Let guys take u out on dates, trust me you’ll be happy & content u won’t want a relationship. There’s plenty of people in this world, no need to be fixated on one guy when u can have fun in your free time. Maybe one day your heart will heal and you will meet the right person but don’t make the mistake of jumping into a relationship with a man without a game plan, if you want a life partner make sure he’s all in! Take your time.

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  • How long ago did this happen?

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    • Not long ago. But it’s beem a while coming.
      See I had someone who was literally the most loyal person you could find. I’m not exaggerating. My friends used to tell me how lucky I am because guys like him don’t exist anymore. His eyes wouldn’t even wonder. Everything he did was for me. I was so comfortable in the fact that I was his world.
      Other men can’t measure up romantically to him, and he still cheated.

    • I'm guessing you have limited experience, time will help

  • I’ve seen certain women happy single. :/

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    • And to the down voter, singleness doesn’t mean being completely alone.

    • The downvoter downvoted almost everyone regardless of their answer

    • @Shimy Somebody's being a hater. Think the random pink anon like downvotin' everybody just for the sake of it, but if that makes her "happy" then so be it HAHA!!

  • Noooo

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  • Yess

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  • Hallo

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  • Yes, you shall meet your bridegroom. Spiritual connection. You shall be filled.

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    • Why some women wanted a husband so she can help the man connect on a higher level. In reality she can be happy without man.

  • i could say after being hurt in life it can then lead onto choosing or opting out of trying again, so single finding happiness, yes its possible, its also lonely has its down sides, risking another relationship ultimately brings happiness and issues as the norm.. i think it may be possible to find completeness and happiness being single forever, however, this is exactly the right place to be if you come across a potential partner... after 3 traumas I've opted out looking, i honestly wouldn't say im happy though... working on it...

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  • Im in the same boat as the person who wrote this article just with some slight difference though. But I also ask myself the same exact question. Can I live forever single and never ever date or have a boyfriend or even hang out with guys? Like the poster I dont hate man at all but sometimes even if I dont plan to get married or form a family ever I feel lonely in the relationship department as perhaps at my age is difficult to meet a guy. Not taht Im picky but at my age I can't have the luxury to like meet a guy that could waste my time, because im not getting any younger and it is not that Im going to date way much younger guys than myself or guys who are not mature in mind.

    But I do feel lonely in a way that I will like to expeirence the dating phase with a guy like any ordinary human mortal does it across the globe and so far I have not suceed in that.

    Either guys just want sex or does not want to like date cause they dont want to date steady (many guys are liek that especially around my age who sstill are single) even if I dont plan to marry or have kids and these guys either.

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  • I think you should be able to be happy alone before you can be happy in any relationship.

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