Boyfriend and I got in a fight. What should I do?

We got in a fight day before yesterday because I was supposed to pick him up at work. He texted me he was out so I drove to pick him up just like I do every day. But when I get there he's gone. He apparently got a ride home with some girl at his work. It pissed me off mostly because he told me to come get him and he got a ride instead and didn't even tell me. Then he got mad at me because i was upset with him and we got into a wicked fight. So yeah. It's stupid but whatever. He went to work the next day. Texted me he was sorry and everything. But when he came home later he was really snippy and we hardly talked at all. It's been 2 days now and we haven't spoke (we live together btw) what should I do? Like how should I approach this?

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Most Helpful Guys

  • There is something else happening that you have not discussed. When the anger comes out "sideways" like this, it is almost always a sign of an unresolved underlying issue. Is it possible that he has developed feelings for someone else, wants to break up, but feels guilty about doing so?

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  • You had a right to be mad with him for not telling you that he got a different ride home. Getting a ride home with a female coworker instead of you is already a concern, but then to get defensive because you were upset that he didn't notify you of the change in plans raises even more red flags.

    But, I also don't think you are quite telling the whole story. If while you were mad, you accused him of having nefarious intentions with that female coworker then it makes sense for him to get defensive. You basically just said that you don't trust him which could have hurt him a lot, especially if those kind of thoughts had never crossed his mind.

    It honestly sounds like you guys have a communication problem in your relationship. He failed to notify you of the change of plans and you failed to maintain a calm demeanor when you tried to tell him how that made you feel. Then you two when for 2 whole days without talking to each other, making the communication problem worse.

    If you want to resolve this then you two need to work on your communication skills. Be open with each other, communicate often and in a calm, respectful tone.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I am on your side what was he thinking. its rude and he should be the one to come to you and apologize. also who is this girl at his work? maybe when he saw her he forget that you were gonna get him. am i too paranoiac I don't know.

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    • Its irritating that he got a ride with some girl but I was honestly more upset he just forgot to mention it to me. Like if I had done that he would have been super pissed. And what's more is I was ON TIME picking him up. He didn't even have to wait for me

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    • then tell him how you feel and if he does not care next time he can walk

    • Haha i guess that's what I'll have to do

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 15

  • Different People take a different amount of time to cool off. I'd say give him one more day and then approach him, hug him and talk to him.

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  • tell him to make his own way home from now on, until he learns to grow up, and treats with you respect, when go out your way to do something for him.

    Don’t back down his temper tantrums, fuck him. If he doesn’t he is welcome to go.

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    • people won’t take you seriously, you always back, and they know they are in the wrong. Why doesn’t he grow some balls and apologise to your face, not some half bait text message, sorry but what a coward.

  • 1st, apologise for blowing it out of proportion, even if you did nothing wrong.
    2nd, explain why you were upset.
    3rd, make sure you tell him you love him. Men are very self conscious and fear losing the woman that loves him... I hope the best for you. Good luck

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  • Sounds like you both crave drama, can't help people like that

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    • How? Because we had a fight lol literally every couple does

    • Enjoy your drama

    • Ok dont even answer then lol

  • Give him a couple of days and things should calm down. If you can't talk about with him because he gets snippy or rude about then saddly he may have something going on with her. If he isn't then walk him up with a bj. I have never heard a guy being pissed about a bj if its something he likes normally. That should help pave the way to talking about it

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  • Nothing gets closure better than to talk to your significant other in a calm, soothing manner explaining to them how sorry you were for creating tension in the relationship and that you wish for things to get better! Just tell him that you'd appreciate it next time if he told you he was going to be picked up by someone else instead of wasting your time. Usually if an argument occurs, it's best to wait until the both of you had time to cool off before talking again if the problem can't be solved right there and then. Remind him how much you love him by giving him a big comfy hug, a kiss and/or light scratch on the back. He'll feel a lot more comfortable when he notices how relaxed you are about wanting to talk to him! Hope this helps!

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  • Move on. Try being nice if you want a relationship.

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  • Work it out. That said if this is the reaction to something petty, I hope only one of you is on that lease

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  • Tellem your sorry but he needs to let you know so your not wasting any gasoline looking for the one who need a ride home

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  • Give him space, try to move on.

    He may be having bad days. After a while you should apologize.

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  • Text him , I have forgiven you , take care in future , let's have a cup of coffee

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  • Tell him that you're not mad you're just annoyed that he didn't tell you that you got a ride

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  • Buy some weapon... just in case 😆

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What Girls Said 4

  • Pack a bag and leave, that is what i would do.
    I thought it was woman that do the silent treament? Lol

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  • How long have you guys been together? Something's not right with that. You need to ask him if he loves you.

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  • He’s mad at you for you being mad at him about a behavior he pulled that was unacceptable? On the other hand he did not disregard your pick up offer instead he allows you to burn your gas till you figure he was picked up not by a cab, bus, or a family member but another girl.

    Back in school if I picked up that behavior with my mother she would’ve hunted me down and gave me the biggest whooping of all time. This situation is different of course but just to say you have every right to be mad. Let him come to you to squash everything and Talk to him about it and allow him to explain himself without you giving any input.

    If he decides not to speak to you for days or weeks to come than allow him to decide on his own either to cool down or decide the next step of the relationship.

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  • Well how do you feel? 😕 I'm really sorry you're going through that. There were times I got into arguments with my ex & we'd not talk for days & I hated it bc I love him. I think you should try to talk to him about things, ask him what's going on & tell him how you feel. But never grovel to him.

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