What would you think of an inexperienced partner?

(Guys) I'm 18 and I've never done anything with a guy (not even kissed anyone), not because I haven't been asked out but because I'm pretty shy and because I haven't been asked out by a guy I would want to do any of those things with. If a girl told you this, what would your initial reaction be? Is it more of a turn off or a turn on or neutral?

(Girls) what do you look for in a partner experience-wise? It sounds hypothcritial for me to say bc I'm like the ultimate virgin, but I'd like a more experienced guy (a preference, but not a requirement). What do you guys want?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I would generally steer clear of inexperienced women, but only because I'm not inexperienced. It probably would have been ideal for me if I had a girl equally inexperienced for a first girlfriend, but I didn't.

    I went from crushing on girls I never even dated in my teenage years to falling for my first girlfriend and thinking she was "the one" and making all the classical mistakes of falling for her too quickly. And of course you think she's "the one" if she's your first; you have no point of comparison.

    Yet I worked, over the course of dating many more women after, to the point of realizing these women were not very good for me at all, and that whatever feelings I had towards them, however strong they seemed at the time, were coming from a place of total naivety, like thinking vanilla ice cream is the best thing in the entire world when you never tried anything else.

    And I would not want to date an inexperienced girl and risk her doing that towards me: of becoming all serious and falling for me so quickly, when I'm no longer capable of falling for a girl short of really falling in love with anything but the real deal (not my fantasy of who she is, but who she actually is), and only when the real deal is nothing short of amazing.

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    • And also with my first girlfriend, when she broke up with me (and I don't blame her as I was pathetic and falling for her so deeply and wanting to marry her just half a year into dating), I was pretty devastated for months after. And I think that's typically going to be the sort of thing that happens when you pair an inexperienced person, like I was, with someone more experienced.

      In my case I'd probably date the inexperienced girl, she might fall for me very quickly, and I wouldn't fall for her back. And soon it'd become uncomfortable with her feeling so strongly about me when I don't feel the same (yet, if ever), and would probably break things off and try to set her free to date someone who can feel as strongly towards her as quickly as she can towards him. But that would weigh terribly on my conscience if it leads to a heartbreak and also if I took away her virginity in the process.

      I don't want to carry that sort of weight on my conscience, so I prefer experienced.

    • And for me it has little to do with the experience directly. But to be safe and to avoid causing unnecessary pain, I'd prefer a woman who can have sex without strings attached and, when she falls in love, chances are that the feeling is mutual... that no one is going to fall in love way ahead of the other person. And it seems unlikely to me that an inexperienced girl can do either of these two things.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Every guy is different that's if he's not genuinely interested in pursuing a serious relationship with you other than sex and just making out the whole way through. A guy who is serious and wants a committed relationship will find it appealing to be your first kiss or first date as well it being a lot of pressuring making sure you enjoy whatever he's presenting to you because if not than you'll try and find what you're looking for elsewhere.

    If a guy doesn't find it fun to be your first or to try and teach you than he's not the one and will probably shove his tongue down your throat and kick you out the car on a date night compared to a guy who will have the AC in the car, parked in front of your house, build the intimacy and first, pull you in slowly and teach you the right way. Even if it's not perfect he'll make sure you get it right and since it's you that he's kissing he would find enjoyment.

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What Guys Said 4

  • When I was 18, I don't think it would have been a problem as Long as I found her fun to be around and she was willing to have sex.

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  • Well if a girl would told me that and I believe her than I would value her more.

    tvtropes.org/.../NatureAdoresAVirgin

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  • Mild turn off as Im going to have to teach you, bit the trade off is you have no bad habits so it really is very mild.

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  • Adorable.

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What Girls Said 0

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