My boyfriend and I broke up today - should I delete him on facebook and block his number?

I am angry at him - I think his pastor convinced him to dump me but the fact he wasn't smart enough to reject the pastor's advice is what makes me angry. HIs pastor has always hated me because we had a lot of theological disagreements with each other. I want my ex-boyfriend to know he has lost me for good and will never get me back.

On facebook I block people from searching my name or adding me as a friend so if I were to block him on facebook he will never be able to contact me on facebook again and won't be able to re-add me as a friend.

I also plan on changing cell phone providers soon which means I will change my phone number too.

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What Guys Said 42

  • Do you feel it's necessary? Like do you think he will try again? Or you just don't even want the possibility? To me, it's seems a bit extreme, but this is up to you. I personally wouldn't block someone ever unless I was being "harassed" constantly or stalked. But that's me. But you're probably acting out your anger also, which I can understand. But unless you know for sure, don't assume that it's the pastor's fault. I mean, sure, if that's true, it wouldn't have helped, but like you said, he has a mind of his own. Chances are, there were doubts there to begin with IF the pastor actually did convince him of this? I always try and put myself in these positions and one thing I know to be true, it's extremely rare that you can convince someone to do something they don't want to do. They'll do it regardless, right or wrong. So my point his, the pastor may have "fueled the fire" so to speak, but the fire was already there I'm guessing, you know? Your boyfriend may have just realized that you two weren't right for each other possibly?

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  • That's going a bit too far. I mean, it's not like he's some serial killer stalking you. He's just an ex you never want to deal with again. Deleting him from your friend list and contacts is enough. Doing more than that is immature and a sign of weakness.

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  • You are overreacting. Bet this isn't the first time you two "broke up" like this. Also, if you are challenging his core beliefs instead of accepting them as his core beliefs, then of course the spiritual leader of his faith will suggest he leave you. This should all be common sense. You are obviously trying to change him and he does not want that.

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  • I personally dont block my exs and thats probably what takes me so long to get over them. I dont really have an answer for you all i can say I've been through your situation i know how it feels. I know im young but I've gone through more than you know and give much relationship advice to people your age and do a great job so I don't know. If you need to talk or vent just dm me. Im here for you.

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  • What does his pastor have to do with it? The job of a pastor is to guide his congregation not control it.

    If you're that angry about it then I suggest you just leave it be unless he's still messaging you

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  • The way you are breaking contact seems immature and overly dramatic. I know you must be upset, but keep in mind that you need to look strong. Moreover, I am assuming you are non-Christian : the bible does speak against non-Christian relationships, and I personally think significant differences in belief, even between Catholics and Jews, or Jehovahs Witnesses, can cause friction.

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  • Sorry about the breakup Yes block him and change your number. That will teach him a lesson. It's his lost.

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  • I unfollow only. Its reversable and you also don't have to see their postings.
    The only exception was my last ex dumped me and started immediately posting photos of her and someone else. She I unfriended. It depends on the circumstances.

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  • If you're truly done with him than blocking is an effective tactic. Maybe sleep on it and make a decision when you're less emotional.

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  • this isn't going to help im afraid, if you choose to block him you're showing a reaction and one day you will regret it then you will unblock him, and contact him asking how he is.
    If however you keep your position open and unblocked (not showing any kind of anger reaction) he will feel regret the break up and contact you (this is when you know he thought about you). If you block him you'll never know. But you do need to realise he will move on with his life and the break up was for a good reason. Guys need a wise man in their life to explain how a girl is feeling and thinking in a situation, girls and guys think differently, we overlook things and we can only become consciously aware of things through support, without support we dont learn. Dont have bad feelings about the pastor, you need to evaluate the things you were doing to check you werent making fundamental errors. Girls are emotional sensitive people and things can get in the way of a decent relationship.

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  • If you feel like being petty and immature about the situation, you're on the right path. You could also take the good with the bad, as in the disagreements you two had, may have been trouble for the future, meaning there is a better fit for both of you who agree with your theological understandings. Having lost someone is difficult, but we don't always understand why it happens, until time passes by, and we start to realize what we had to go through to learn such a valuable lesson, which can change our mindsets for the future. If we take it well, then for the better, but if we take it negatively and ignore the lesson, it can lead to worse decisions in the future. Take life day by day. That's all we can do.

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  • no, don't block him! he's going to contact you in a few days to make up with you!

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  • Decide once your anger subsides. In the interim, you may want to refrain from posting anything derogatory about the situation, despite how much you're hurting.

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  • Yes you will feel much better because you don't want to get hurt all over again. Holding on to the past bring back bad memories.

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  • Yes you should do you can heal from the break up and when your ready to speak again then unblock him

    Can you answer mine please, it’s on my page it’s the most recent.

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  • You sound bitter and vindictive. What does Jesus say about that?

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  • Once again religion destroys lives. I think you're better without him.

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  • Only if the breakup is real and you're not going to run back to him. Only you will know if you're going to honestly let him go or not

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  • Do nothing in haste or anger. Burning bridges is never a good idea.

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  • Don't block him because that's immature. However don't bother contacting him or accepting contact from him as if you are blocking him. But only do this if you are certain that it is his pastor or some other authority figure that is the reason for this. I say that because if he is listening to authority figures taking advice on his love life and letting them decide who he should date or who not then he is hopelessly immature and not adult enough to even be with you so you might as well just move on and not bother with him anymore.

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What Girls Said 34

  • But if you've always had disagreement with each other, what made this time different? What was the reason for deciding let's break up? Was it something major that the 2 of you should've worked out? Or was it something that you (singular) have done or said to him?

    I think that when 2 people are in a relationship, you need to reflect on yourself, in addition to putting the fault on the other person.

    What I want you to figure out with my above comments is: What have you done or said that might've caused a major disagreement, and for him to seek advice from his pastor this time?

    Now, I don't think it's a good idea to let anybody dictate one's relationship. I understand that for some people, religions are the go-to place for problem-solving and decision-making, but if a person lets somebody else decided whether they should be with someone or not, that reflects poorly on the person's views of his/her relationship.

    Anyone in a relationship will need some advice from others, but needs to have an idea of how he/she thinks about their relationship, and what their decisions are more inclined to, instead of just blindly follow what somebody else says. I think it's true for friendship as well. If person A says to person B don't be friend with person C, and this B follows what A said, this B lacks self-sufficiency and authority of their own minds. They don't think for themselves; they let somebody else think for them.

    However, belief in religions or lack thereof can play a major role between 2 people in a relationship. That is, if the 2 of you have different opinions and views on religions, then you might not be compatible with each other. In addition, if there was something that warranted a breakup, then it would happen sooner or later. I think that without evidence, you really can't say that he broke up with you because he followed what his pastor said. He might have thought it over and made his decision.

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    • 4d

      Regardless of who influenced the breakup between 2 of you, I don't think it's necessary to block him on social media and all methods of contact. If he broke up with you, do you think he would really bother you, search you on Facebook, text you, and/or call you?

      I think that un-friending him and deleting him would probably be appropriate if you just don't want to have anything to do with him. However, if both of you had agreed to stay friends, deleting him would contradict your agreement. Either way, I think blocking him and changing phone number will just show that you're not dealing with this the adult way.

    • 4d

      In addition, what are some things that you might need to work on yourself in the meanwhile? I don't mean changing your religion, but were there other things that might have posed some issues between the 2 of you? Personality, opinions, behaviors, etc.

      A breakup is not the end. It's the time for yourself, to take care of yourself, and make a better self for yourself and for your next relationship.

  • I personally did delete the number of this guy and I did because we broke up in a bad way, I found out a bunch of sh*t he had been doing behind my back and I knew I would have had the urge to text him if I hadn't deleted his number. I got rid of all the texts and pictures too.

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  • If "Out of sight, out of mind" is what will help you get over him than so be it but make sure you're not making decisions out of anger and genuinely want to move on. When i am no longer on good terms with a guy i allow them to unadd me or block me if that makes them feel any better because it's not my place to do that.

    Deleting him off of social media won't show that but if he messages you and you don't respond, that will.

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  • I say don't block him, keep pushing forward and let him see your progress and success without him. Only block him if he gets rude. People expect us to fall apart without them and when we don't it's a punch in the guts! Keep your head up and smile and again push forward.

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  • I can understand unfriending him so u can’t see his updates and photos and stuff which could suck if you’re trying to get over him. But is it necessary to block him? Is he harassing you? I think unfriending him should be enough to get your point across. If he harasses u then block him. You can also block phone numbers without needing to get a new number.

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  • I block... if I’m seriously trying to move on I block people. I don’t need to see any parts of them what so ever! I take the blocks off once I’m done healing.
    This prevents over emotional messaging and phone calls.
    If you are SERIOUSLY trying to move on do the blocking. DO NOT make contact until you are done healing tho

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  • No don't block him or delete his number or all of your pictures together.. that is not going to help you to forget about him. Believe me, I talk out of experience ♡ You're just going to be mad at yourself because u removed everything that u had of him x hope you feel a lot better x

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  • Well you said you think it was because the pastor influenced him to do so. Which means you're not sure. So why are you going to treat him coldly for something you don't even have evidence of him doing? That'd be a new low. Just take time to cool down, because right now you are really angry and might end up doing something you'll regret later

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  • Its just a fight. Wait. You will probably get back together. Instead of talking to him aout that you say you are angry. OK. You have the right to be. but dont let your anger to break you too. Call him. Talk to him. Relationships aren't perfect , they have ups and downs but if you want. You can get above all of these things and be together if you want.

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  • unfriend and all that stuff, but don't block until later. you'll see then if he's still trying to reach out or if he's been unneccesarily rude. block him immediately if he's been rude before in some horrible undeniable way. but wait until things settle down a bit otherwise.

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  • If you do not love him, the relationship you had with him was toxic it would be best if you do block him and move on.

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  • social media can be a powerful thing. I think just block him for now and keep the contact number. if he really wants to fix this genuinely then he will attempt to talk to you via mobile and not just stalk over the internet. if seeing his profile pop up on your newsfeed makes you upset or angry then its for the best

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  • Personally? Block him from all social media, and keep the phone open. If you keep feeling yourself disappointed that his not texting you, it’s empowering to block his number because your the one that is blocking him rather than expecting him to text you and not receive a response. The social media is definitely a thing you should block him from. For your / his sake. He’ll probably stalk you & you’ll know his stalking which is why you would post something cliquey like ‘I trusted you, it’s not your fault but it’s mine’ and you’ll look silly & the other way around, you’ll constantly stalk his page to see if he updated his status or something. Blocking him helps you because your not gonna add him back to see his posts, so it helps!

    I used to be a in a similar situation with religious authorities, it can go both ways but don’t take only personal.

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  • I wouldn't do anything out of anger, just wait it out and see how you feel after a while? You don't have to be friends, but being on bad terms with someone isn't great either, especially if it can be avoided.

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  • You're not even sure that his pastor influenced him to break with you, so you don't have any evidence. You can do whatever you need to move on and forget him, but this seems like a 15 YO's tantrum.

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  • If you do NOT want contact at all then block him. I've learned from my daughter's ex that men can be like whiny children when you break up.
    She doesn't need that and neither do you.

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  • I think deleting and blocking him is enough, going as far as changing your number is a bit over the top though. At the end of the day if he REALLY wants to contact you for whatever reason, he'll most likely find a way to do so (he probably knows where you live and could send letters - you're not going to move because of him too, are you?). So simply blocking him should be enough, anything beyond that seems a bit crazy, petty and unnecessary.
    I'm really sorry that he broke up with you for such a reason and I understand your anger. However, before totally doing everything in your power to block him from getting any sort of contact with you, just breathe for a minute and let the dust settle for at least a couple of weeks. He might not even want to try to contact you, and if that's the case, you'll have changed your phone number for no reason. Not to mention that you can just ignore him if he tries to reach out.

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    • 4d

      Like unless he starts harassing you, deleting and blocking is enough.

  • I only block if they're a nuiscance after the breakup.

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  • Yes you can block him and not contact him ever again. If you need to do so to heal then do it.

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  • Is this the guy you had the dream about? Did u find him?

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