If you are single and ready to mingle than WHY are you not using Online Dating Sites and Apps?

If you are single and ready to mingle than WHY are you not using Online Dating Sites and Apps?
  • Catfishers and Scammers
    Vote A
  • Too many fake profiles
    Vote B
  • You have to be good looking or you are screwed
    Vote C
  • These sites just take your money
    Vote D
  • They are all just hook up sites
    Vote E
  • All the above
    Vote F
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
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Most Helpful Girls

  • I’ve made a few connections on dating apps that weren’t bad. One thing I noticed was how people posted lengthy criteria in their bios and “don’t contact me if blablahblah.” It’s good to know what you want in a partner but on dating sites, it seems like both men and women want to find someone they’re unlikely to find due to their criteria.

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    • Also, I was on match. com for a while and even there, people were mostly looking for friends with benefits or just a sexual relationship.

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    • Unfortunately, I live in a really small town and work a lot. The type of men (qualities) that I would usually look for were not available in the singles population of my small town. Online dating in the surrounding areas gave me a wider window.

    • I am the same way , you see the movies. Where this people have a date before they food is ready cause the location is so big no wonder. But when your locations is small. You get the same people no matter what. Then you start to wonder if I just look at other people who are far away maybe they will be interested in talking and we can start something. NOPE that does not work either WHY. They never respond or its "Thank you " enough said

  • I have never tried any of the online dating sites because most of them are just another legal scam sites trying to make a big buck on the back of those desperate enough to use their services.

    To me, the traditional way to find the person of your dreams cannot be replaced by those marketing and expensive gimmicks of the creators of dating sites.

    Honestly, how many people creating a dating profile give an true image of themselves. There is always some detail that needs to be hidden, modified, embellished or otherwise "forgotten".

    Photoshop or any of those free online image editing software can make a prince out of a hunchback or a beauty queen out of a person botched by nature.

    Latest after the 20th first dates with 100% guaranteed matches do you awaken and realize that you are not an inch further than when you paid $$$ for the dream profile on those dating sites that guarantee you success.

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    • You have never tried any of the sites but somehow know all this will happen.. wow you are simply amazing. LOL

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    • Fair enough. I just hope you don't live your life base on other opinions and use your gut to try new things. Thanks for the comment!

    • Oh I made my fair share of wrong decisions in my life and I learned the lessons the hard way. These are not a deterrent to try new things and again falling on my nose. But so is life!

Most Helpful Guys

  • Meet people IN PERSON. 80-90% of people use online sites either as hook-up apps or as a fantasy (as in, they're a 4 out of 10, but they think they deserve at LEAST a 9.5). That makes it mostly a waste of time. Plus, a huge amount of time, people end up talking with people who don't live nearby, which means they never/nearly never get to see them in person, and LDRs are a complete waste of time and energy.

    DATE LOCAL and meet people in person. You cut through most of the BS that way.

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  • I've tried dating sites and apps, I still try them, but I'm no longer naive enough to think something will truly come from those sites. But there's still that small part of me that wants to believe those sites and apps might work, that's why I haven't given up on them entirely.

    But from my experience, such as the other day on the mingle site, a girl sent me a wink, then a message the next day, then another wink. I hadn't responded until then because her profile was empty aside from a photo. But I finally decided to send her a message asking to know more about her interests. Her response was, "we can talk about our interests soon, but right now I'd like to hear what your experience is with this website".

    Honestly, the response wasn't far from what I expected, only in this case dangling a carrot on a stick that would never come. But at least it was with a free dating site. It's similar to other dating sites, these days, either the women get overwhelmed from email responses from guys, or they only date guys of their religion, or it's actually a cyber bot or a scammer.

    As for dating apps, women on there either ghost a person if the message doesn't navigate their invisible minefield, or they're bots.

    Again this is just my experience, I know other people have success with the sites and apps. How... I have no idea.

    Though several years ago I did actually get a few first dates from dating sites, even then they were odd. One girl performed the date as though it were an interview and then after the "15 minute block" actually told me something to the effect of, you may go now. Then as I confusedly stood up, realized she had not only continued sitting, but took out a book to read while checking her watch.

    I don't know, it's just weird.

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    • The bots and scammers are getting more creative that is for sure. I would never saying online dating is the best thing since slice bread but if you can maneuver through it in a way where to know how to just keep moving forward from the muck.. it does pay off for a lot of people I know.. patience though is a rarity in 2018. People just don't have any.

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 33

  • My reason for not using those sites wasn't listed as an option. My biggest problem with dating apps is the quality of men on there. Not referring to physical appearance but personality. The vast majority of men I've met on dating sites have been some combination of mentally unstable, overbearing, desperate or the polar opposite: lazy, only wanting to text, never expressing interest in actually meeting in person or they genuinely expected ME to pursue THEM.

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  • Because whenever I asked people about dating apps and which they would recommend they told me it was pointless for finding a meaningful connection and was just full of shady characters.

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    • Well I am the world's expert in Online Dating so I say try Bumble. That app puts you in the drivers seat and it's one of my favorite to recommend.

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    • Keep us updated damnit!

    • Ahaha! Ok @Prof_Don. So far I started sending messages to the few I swiped on, heard back from two of them already. Who knows what will become of anything, but it’s kinda fun. Thanks guys for the motivation lol 😊

  • My answer isn't one of the options...
    You can't get to know someone's values and personality just based on what they write on their profile. I only consider dating people that I can see myself being emotionally compatible with, which means I have to know the person at least somewhat. With strangers on the internet, you never know what you're getting.

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  • Too many people don't read the Damn profile I simply asked for someone no older than 30 and a bunch of pervy 50-76 year olds. I said I didn't want a sugar daddy

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  • 99.9999999% of guys want to stick their dick in a hole so no thank you.

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    • Yea eventually. Eventually I plan on having my own kids but I need to get to a more stable place in life before that happens. Sure it's fun and all but even protection fails sometimes. Then again, I don't see myself as a asshole.

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    • @VenaticGnu60 then you must be one of the 0.000001 I excluded 😋

  • I have used them in the past- which is exactly why I am NOT using them anymore:
    -People just looking for flings or sex, not real relationships (mostly this reason right here!) If that's what you want? Great. But some of us are looking for real commitment.
    -People lying about who they really are or what they want just to impress other people
    -Some people just do not know how to interact with others, so they use dating apps/sites in hopes to hide their ineptness
    -People setting unrealistic wants and standards, yet most of them can't even meet their own standards they expect others to have.

    Now I just stick to either meeting people in person, or if it is online, areas where I know we'll have something in common. Online apps are great for friendships! I have made friends on them. But dating or a relationship? Nope.

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  • Because unlike some women my age, I’m not in a rush to get married and start popping out kids before the biological clock strikes twelve. I want to fall in love first (which takes time) and then let all the rest happen as it’s supposed to. I either meet guys on line who don’t reciprocate my interest or want to settle down right away. The last one was talking about getting engaged after only dating for a month. Needless to say that relationship is now history. As of right now, I’m single and whatever is supposed to happen will happen

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  • I say that if you're too lazy to go out there and try to connect with someone "in the good, old fashioned way", i. e. direct interactions, face-to-face conversations etc. (you get the picture), then maybe you are not prepared for a relationshop.
    When communicating with someone through these apps, you can put to display your best profile picture, you can take some time to think about how should you reply, or you can refuse that person in an instant. And the way people present themselves feels like you're going to the market, trying to pick a partner, by looking at the "wrapping". And, as simple as it may sound, what all this technologization does is taking away the feeling from the whole "falling for someone" thing.
    You won't be as anxious, knowing that you're meeting in 30' and you have a bad hair day, or you won't be able to look them in the eyes, see the way they smile or giggle when you're making a joke, and so on.

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  • I’d rather meet someone naturally. If it’s meant to happen it will. If not I’ll manage. I also choose not to look, but my heart is open to a relationship.

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  • almost all men I met online just wanna hook up, they don't look at me in the long run, and this is kinda disgusting to me so it's a no go for me.

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  • I think you should add an option like "others".
    First, not all people in online dating sites are like those.
    Second, it mostly depends on the type of site. Most are designed for hook ups. But there are some decent ones.

    You may not find your 'soulmate' there, but it's still worth a try. I've actually met a lot of cool people - some are even my friends until now.

    However, it should not be your only place to look for a date. And also, you should be able to screen people like a human resource professional.

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  • Apps never work out for me because I found that on apps, I tend to have more anxiety and stay more fixated on looks. It's a personal issue really because I'll swipe and think "is he tall? does he look good? are his teeth straight?" because no matter how much they have in their bios, I can just see a face. And even then I have a lot of anxiety meeting people from the internet so I never swipe right or agree to meet. I like meeting someone face to face and judging the whole package; apps don't offer that.

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  • For me it is just too much drama.
    Seriously I met complete maniacs on sites like Tinder. I am better off trying to pick guys up at the club or off the street lol.

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  • You forgot an option for people who are using it or people who are not mingling.

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  • There is too much fake people is on the internet, and I prefer to see that person's face in person, and talk face to face. No Internet to Internet. Just saying. Too much weirdos out there.

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  • I want a meaningful relationship not a hook up. I have good confidence so I'm not going to settle... and also there aren't hot guys on dating apps.

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  • I do use them.
    Haven't met anyone that id wanna go out with though.

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  • I don’t like it. I want the meet a man in real life. But, I had some cool conversation tho.

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  • Catfishers.. too many insecure people on dating sites versus secure.

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  • Many of them want money. So few live in my municipality.

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  • I only use dating sites because I don't go to places where I can mingle with people.

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  • there's a lot of fake profiles & guys just looking for hook ups

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  • I dont believe in online dating

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  • lol worst place to find someone

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    • Agree to disagree. I know too many successful people who have found great relationships with online dating. Online dating can be just as bad as a dirty hole in the wall bar but put the two head to head.. online dating wins every time. Thanks for the comment!

  • That's a last resort I shall never use.

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  • I kinda wanna try but im too young 🤔

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  • Dating apps sucks

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  • I mean I use them LOL

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  • Dating apps are worst to find love.

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  • Overall apps not working for me

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What Guys Said 88

  • From my point of view, one of the biggest problems, even if everything is legit about them and there is something in common is that you develop an image of them which isn't quite as informed as one where you met them IRL and could observe body language and other things about them, plus the interaction is different.

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    • Is what I was thinking. Either you will idealize that person or that person will idealize you sooner or later. Even tough I don't believe in LDR anymore, I think is important to close the distance the soonest as possible, but it can end up having the same results. Online dating is a big risk.

  • I suck at socializing with the opposite sex. I share too much and scare them away. So I just keep to myself

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  • All of the above. Have experienced all options. I was actually replied to once saying "I dont like you, just letting you know you're too ugly to be on here" I felt like killing myself that day.

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    • Over what a stranger told you? You are better than that.

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    • My life has been wasted completely so far. I work incredibly hard and still live paycheck to paycheck. My body is always tired and sore. I have no free time. I feel no pleasure, happiness, joy from anything. All my hobbies have died. And I have no real life friends. I barely have enough motivation to get out of bed and work because even though I'm completely miserable I need something to do or I'll waste away.
      I actually went to the doctor a month ago for chest pains. My doctor said that im so stressed and depressed that my body can only make sense of the mental and emotional pain by mimicking minor heart attacks.

    • Don't give up man... you ever listen to gary vee? Here is one of my fav videos from him. Hope you follow some positive peeps in your life to get you going in the right direction. You can do it man. Don't get so good at explaining how depressed and sick you are because that will be what you end up being good at and that ain't it brother. Take some risks and enjoy it. I hope you watch this video and it helps... I wish I had Gary Vee when I was your age.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WzNrjLf278Y

  • I tried Happn, Tinder, Bumble, Coffee Meets Bagel and others. I didn't get many matches and if I did, the girls were fucked in the head. It's a bit of everything from a catfishing, fake profiles, girls having super/super/super HIGGGGH expectations finding prince charming. I got sick of it, I got tired of paying for those apps, I deleted it and it's a waste of time, fucking pointless as shit.

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    • I think a guy or girl, man or woman can actually find someone easier on this site then those dating apps because you don't expect to meet people on here, it's just to post question and provide answers to questions. But sometimes you may click with someone off GAG and exchange social media and boom, talking and etc. Obviously, the disadvantage is, you'd most likely be far away from that person.

  • I tried tinder from late 2015 to late 2017... My college roommate would make me check it before bed.. In two years I got one match during class and was unmatched by the time the professor let us out.

    At some point he gave up with trying to get me a girlfriend and I just stopped trying.

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  • Online dating is terrible. Women on dating apps aren't what I would call desirable. You can't start a conversation with half of them because those you attempt to reach out to typically don't respond and it takes at least 2 people to have a conversation.

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  • Because girls rarely reply to messages. Guys have to work hard on their profiles and fine tune every word, it's almost like they can't even be themselves. But a girl can just put "Piss off, I like drugs" on her profile and still be swarmed with messages. The footing on dating websites isn't fair since there are way more guys than girls.

    I have a girlfriend now that I met outside of a dating website, and I recommend no one to ever use dating sites as a method.

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  • Pretty much all of the above. Most I got out of it was some woman that kept postponing our date "we don't know each other" -> How the fuck are we supposed to get to know each other? I am not an ax murderer. I have no criminal record.

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  • Because I'm not 18 and I don't feel like lying about my age.

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    • All the girls do it. If you find someone of legal age on tinder or okcupid then you are a lucky person indeed. Plenty of fish is the most accurately named one out there. Full of cat fish

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    • @Kolton You get what you pay for. If someone doesn't have money to lose on a free dating site, then you will get scores of fake profiles and catfish.

    • Yup, I'm not saying that its surprising or anything like that. Just calling a spade a spade

  • Because dating apps ars based almost entirely on appearance. Steroytypes, descrimination, assumptions racial profiling is at its highest with online dating. It lets the worst of people come out. Because they are behind a computer just typing away

    It’s ok. But for the most part I think it’s a toxic environment. Nothing beats old fashioned true face to face interaction

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  • I have been a member of several of these type of "services" and unless a person can afford to pay to join them, by and large, they don't work, even if they DO pay to join. At this point, since I am retired and on Medicare (a fixed income), I CANNOT afford to join any of these services which makes it unfair to both me and the women who might write back to me as well.

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  • Doesn't work for me. I have always been cautious about them and I confess that last year I used Tinder, but it's just not for me, I don't trust people enough and I barely had any matches because I never liked anyone. I'm more of a real life person.

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  • Primarily because it’s more fulfilling to meet people in real life. That, and of course everything you say. I believe most profiles are very deceitful.

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  • "All of the above" and I find them to be a complete waste of time and effort. Unless you want to go on their make up a bullshit fake profile to just fuck around with it and see what kind of messages or response you are gonna get or be humorous about it and see if you'll get some feed back from people that read your profile and had a good laugh or too I simply just don't see the point of it, best to just not bother with it at all.

    They simply are just way too good to be true either way. Single for life, I don't mingle.

    @LegatLanius? You've been there. You know it is.

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    • @LegateLanius? You've been there. You know it is.

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    • And you know what? Life will end one day anyway and then it will be darkness and nothingness for all eternity. So I'll just do what I enjoy before my time is up. That includes dating childfree women.

    • @Unit1 THAT'S THE SPIRIT! 👍 👍 👍

  • Because they're mostly bullshit and who wants to just have cyber sex when they'd rather have the real thing?

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  • I can't because my wife made a rule that she had to go with me on my first 3 dates (with the same person) and she's too busy now.

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  • Instead of me writing a paragraph of all the reasons ill tell you this. Go make a profile and try to get a date from a girl I wish you good luck. All the girls on there are fake or if real don’t reply.

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  • When ever I match on tinder, the conversation seems to die off after a couple messages. I dont know if it's because the girls I match with lose interest, or if I just stuck at having an engaging conversation.

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    • Stop the conversation and get them offline.. say I hate these apps.. wanna meet for coffee? Say this when you feel in your gut its about to go south. You have nothing to lose.

  • As someone who DOES use it, all these are valid reasons but there are better ones like how no one is actually there for anything because they are all scared to commit or like the feeling of meeting someone knew and dont want to get familiar

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    • Many people are using these sites and not actually ready to meet someone. True.. very true.

  • All of these are genuine issues with dating sites and apps which ones in particular may very from site to site though

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  • Online is difficult. Could be used in addition to, but not only. I know people who have met and married from online dating so it can work. Key seemed to be really good writing and clarity of purpose, timing and luck.

    Relationships require skilled communication, but online is written/text communication and marketing. It is a whole different skill set. Much easier to make an impression, form a judgement of connection or potential in person.

    I do see value in personality profile matching, that is helpful and had some interesting dates that way.

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  • I have used them for years and even met an ex on there.
    The type of people who use these sites are usually seeking casual sex, approval, or short flings. They aren't looking for serious relationships.

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  • I tried, but it was just a waste of time.

    Nothing quite like when you get very little matches for a lot of effort, and then even fewer conversations, all of which die.

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  • I met my girlfriend of two years on OKCupid (free version), so it is possible to find someone using online dating! :)

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  • Because they're useless. Tons of fake profiles, scammers, extortionists, predators, and attention seekers. Of the 1 in a million girls that are actually looking for a relationship have too many dms and they won't read what you wrote to them.

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  • The main reason is Dating apps require more info than the IRS. I dislike trying to narrow myself down in Uniqueness terms just for a shot at advertised Happiness. I can find my own fun.

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  • Where's the "Because I'm an old fuddy duddy" option for old dinosaurs like me?

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  • How about, they don't work...
    Like really, I used every dating app and still didn't get anything real...
    Unless I look ugly, I have no other answer.

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    • Well if you posted the photo in your profile on a dating site.. I would say YEP you are right.. they don't work. Sometimes it's not the site that doesn't work but the user that isn't understanding what to post or write. Reflection and self awareness is sometimes key.

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    • I hear you man.. well I wish you the best of luck.

    • Thanks man 🙏

  • I think it's more than good looks. I've had pretty and not women in real life check me out and find me cute or hot, before I spoke to them. So it's not like it's my personality that drew them in. But I do have a good personality. I find online datiing is just difficult. Women are super picky and don't want to date on them. I read only 25% of women use the sites as far as wanting to meet a guy. So many will message and match, but it usually ends there. Better chances are in real life, good looking or not.

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  • After my first relationship ended (a serious long distance relationship), I haven't seen online dating the same way. I think is to risky. The best partners you find in person, not online.

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