It it okay for a girl to ask out a guy?

There's this guy (a family friend) that I like a lot. I've liked him for a while now. He is so sweet and has the greatest personality, exactly what I want in a guy. Our families had a BBQ and we all went swimming. I got cold so I got out. He handed me my towel and put it arou d my shoulders... he held me and kept me warm. Afterwards we sat together and he played with my hair. We don't talk over the phone, but he is hardly ever on his phone. So I don't know if he likes me or not. And also we don't really see each other often, but when we do we talk a lot. I don't know how to approach this situation, I really like him. I want to ask him out, but I'm afraid he's going to reject me. Is it okay for a girl to ask a guy out?
Updates:
1d
I'm really shy l and don't know how to approach this situation. Any advice on how to do it?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • It's perfectly fine to ask a guy out, and there's just way too much pressure on guys to do it in fear of rejection. However what you should do is make the first move and give an indication of your interest in him. Just send a casual text for coffee or a drink, to break the ice.

    However, I'm slightly ol school so if he accepts your invitation and you have a good time suggest we should do it again and let him then ask you next time... if he does not oblige you have your answer and little damage is done, bearing in mind your family friends status.

    Good luck

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What Guys Said 83

  • Of course it is OK for a girl to ask a guy out. I know it's a big step for you, but you like him, so you should go for it. I think your chances are excellent with him.

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  • First, obviously YES, in fact is afraid the reason because women usually doesn't make it. And being coward isn't something positive.
    Second, if he played with your hair it's obvious he likes you, but you have only one reason to that nervous, you don't know anything about him.
    Gather more information, what does he like? Does he have a girlfriend? Plus, he is a friend of your family, so you don't really have someone who can make you that transition easier? This is the time when you ask to family or friends help to conquer him.
    By example, gather information about what he likes and you are good and make interesting something about you before you even talk to him.
    By example:
    Hey guy what are you doing about this weekend?
    If you are good at it:
    Really? I know a girl who is really good at it...
    If you not:
    I had a good friend who played really well, he said that the best part was having her girlfriend watching him, does your girlfriend go too?

    If you get someone doing it for you, it's invaluable and you will be presented in the best forn possible so you can be yourself.

    In conclussion
    1. He likes you although you don't know the degree
    2. Ask help to your friends and family
    3. Gather information

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  • Of course it’s ok to ask him out , the worst that can happen is that he says he’s not interested and given what you have said I’m pretty sure that would happen. There is a good chance he is thinking exactly the same as you. You really cannot afford to let your fear of rejection be a reason in anything. Life is full of it

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  • Million time we gonna say yes
    And million time girls will not do it
    So why asking

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  • Why wouldn't it be? I know it might be hard especially if you're shy, but imagine the struggles the guys go through when they ask a girl out. Just do it your way and however you're comfortable with it.

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  • Do it. He's probably sitting home thinking "should I call her for a date? What if she doesn't like me that way?" Someone has to do something, or nothing happens. Don't make a big deal out of it. Just text him "Hey, want go for coffee/get a drink/take a walk/whatever... with me?"

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  • If you like him you should go for it. You'll never know unless you try.

    You're best option is tell him directly how you feel. He may feel the same but he may believe that he is in the friend zone. You have the power to break him out of that thought.

    Another option but in my opinion far less chance of success is to hint that you want more than friendship.

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  • "I really like him. I want to ask him out, but I'm afraid he's going to reject me."

    Welcome to a man's world.

    Honestly, rejection is part of life. You'll get rejected by people of the sex you're interested in. Your proposals, manuscripts, submissions, offers might get rejected. Your views, your positions, your philosophies, principles, and virtues might also all get rejected.

    Fear rejection, certainly - but do it anyway.
    Your life begins where your comfort zone ends.

    Just remember this, no one is obligated to say "yes" if you ask them out on a date. Someone rejecting you politely doesn't mean they're a dick. It means they're not obligated to say "yes."

    Good luck and be strong!

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  • It's absolutely fine to ask him out. It also appears that he has a fondness for you, and probably would be really happy that you asked him out first.. . Go for it, Girl!

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  • Yes why not if you do it right an the guy likes you he will go out with you just say I'm goibg to the movies what movie are you wanting to see an we can meet each other their if he doesn't show up make shure you have a friend go to but if he shows, have friend sit on diffrent isle or diffrent movie

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  • Just ask him if he would like to do something with you. Play video games, teach you bowling (anything he is good at and where you can both be alone).

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  • It is okay for you to ask him out. If you really like him then you should go for it. You may be a little nervous about it, but you will feel really good once you do it. I get nervous asking girls out that I like as well, but I go for it and dont worry about what happens. You can do it!!!

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  • Yeah, of course it's totally fine for you to ask him out. Once you start having the initial conversation it's going to be a little weird at first, but once you get into it and tell him how you really feel, and that you want to go out with him he's going to say yes.

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  • He's a family friend and seems to like you. Get him talking and either ask to meet up with him informally in the next week, or just say you'd like to spend a bit more time with him. See what his reaction is.

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  • Here is a confidence booster , you are far less likely to be rejected as a female asking a a male , than the typical male asking female. You will never get a rude rejection.

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  • It is one hundred percent okay. I think I speak for most of us guys that when we say that it would be amazing if we got asked more often to take that weight off of our shoulders. I can understand that you are shy when I was younger I wouldn't talk to anybody. I have since grown out of that and talk to like everybody. People probably wish I would shut up a lot, but whatever. Also, I believe speaking for kost of us we always try to let the girl down easy if we aren't interested, and usually would love to stay friends or become closer friends. I say go for it girl because honestly if he is already doing that for you, I bet he is interested, but just as afraid to pop the question as you.

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  • It's ok but not recommeneded.. my advice is to use your feminine skills to show him that you care (even if takes time) in order to guarantee that he is willing to spend time with you and ask you out..

    Good luck 🙂

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  • I know that you know that it is more than ok to ask him out. Your real question is how. It’s easy. You call him, meet up with him and tell him exactly how you feel.

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  • I dk why it wouldn't be ok. I dk how much my experience would mean, but as a person whos super shy it would be sucha relief if it wasn't always pinned on me.

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  • I have no problem asking a girl out, but it'd be a fun change of pace if a girl did, and I think most guys feel the same, it's cool when girls do it. Go for it!

    And it sounds like he's definitely trying to warm up to you, a little tactic guys use when they like a girl but doesn't want to be the one to make the first move. They'll drop as many hints as they can and wait for you to acknowledge it in some way. So just tell him indirectly that you like him and wanna hang out, that's easier than flat out admitting feelings. "You know, I think you're pretty cool, we should hang out and do X sometime."

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  • Yes, of course it is okay for a girl to ask out a guy.

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  • A lot of guys actually prefer girls asking them over them asking girls. The trend that guys have to ask is dumb. It is completely okay for you to ask a guy out

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  • Absolutely! Stop hesitating and do it already before you miss your chance!

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  • Ya absolutely because the pressure is on us all the time so a change up every once in a while isn't gonna hurt

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  • My girlfriend asked me out and I have a feeling that she will propose soon

    So yes it is okay. Go ahead

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  • I know this is going to sound so bad, but my response here is, "You have a job don't you?"

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  • I don't see any reason u shouldn't ask him. Gender norms aren't followed these days so its no problem

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  • hell no. imagine a world, where people would just ask for what they want and chose the people they wanna be with freely... outrageous.

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  • Yeah, not sure why this has a negative stigma to it.

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What Girls Said 27

  • of course. Do it, you have nothing to lose and i'm sure he'll appreciate it. Sounds like you guys get along, so go for it!

    Something that works really well (at least it has for me) is not 'asking' but phrase things in a way that he almost has no chance to say no lol When I ask someone out I usually say something like ' I'm going rock climbing tomorrow, you should come'

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  • Ugh, men know what they want that's what I've been taught. If a man wants you he will pursue you. At the same time since he's not pursuing you , you have to put into consideration that he might

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      Be occupied with his career, school, has a love interest, has a girlfriend, or just not interested in you. the only way to know is to not bum rush him but to move slow by learni6about him.

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      Hell he might be gay lol.. lol that's why you gotta take your time

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      I'm not sure if this applies to men wanting a partner, but maybe something less palpable, or just an ambition.

  • yes why would it be weird? I did that too, and it worked out. And tbh some guys are clueless about hints so its better if you just be straight and ask them.

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    • 12h

      You get it... guys tend be dense with detecting flirting. I know i am and probably why im still single lol

  • If a guy wants you, there's nothing stopping him from asking you out unless he has some hidden reasons behind.

    AGAIN this is my opinion and I’m not claiming it to be the most true. I’m not lucky in relationships. I have yet to figure why.

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    • 16h

      Nah a guy can be shy to ask or afraid

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    • 11h

      What would make a guy shy? Guys been born hunters. Is it truth or just a story?

    • 11h

      Ah well whatever with your steadfast opinion no argue possible

  • It’s definitely okay for you to ask a guy out! I’m sure he’ll actually be very flattered. It’s refreshing to hear a girl ask a guy out. I asked a guy out on a coffee date and he was over the moon. Give it a go!

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  • Some cultures it might not be received well, but in general, it's totally ok.

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  • If you are afraid you can give him subtle signs to see how he reacts before, but it's unlikely he will refuse you after what you described

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  • If he is interested, he should take the first move!

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    • 1d

      Its 2018. A guy shouldn't be the only one to make a move. More so since we get accused of harassment if we breathe in a woman's vicinity!

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      A guy won't want to court as you put it if now days its all harassment if you breathe in their area. A guy i go to school with is suspended being in the same room as a girl. Why because she was "harassed" by him being in the room. And this isn't uncommon. So why would a guy want to risk ruining his life?

    • 16h

      Wow wow just wow. It shoudnt be only the man making the move...

  • Everybody's afraid of being rejected. Show that you don't care and that you're strong and ask him out! Hope he's not a dick and will say yes :)

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  • Of course, just say hey I was wondering if you wanted to go out or you could say hang out

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  • Yes it’s totally fine to ask him out. After if he says yes, maybe see if he’ll do it this time. It’s all about reciprocity.

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  • Ask him if he likes you, because you like him and would like to start dating him.

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  • It’s fine just don’t chase him.

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  • Do it.
    You'll never know unless you ask.

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  • Ya why not?

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  • Of course it’s fine for a girl to ask a guy out.

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  • Of course it is, it’s just not common.

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  • of course go for it

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  • Of course

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  • Yeah, it's fine

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  • What would make it "not okay"?

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  • I don't see any problem

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  • Seriously , don't. Guys should ask the girl out. Remain high class babe

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  • Go ahead

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  • We don’t ask these hoes out they ask us.

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  • It frustrates me that I have to ask out a guy and approach him.

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  • Go and do it, ask him out. What will happen? He says yes or no but at least you don't have to live with the feeling "what if I have ever just asked him out...". Just do it!

    I am planning to ask a shy guy out too. If he doesn't like me back then I can finally move on and not wasting more time for dreaming about him.

    Good luck girl 🤞

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