Is having low self esteem a big turn off?


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Most Helpful Guys

  • no it just requires the right guy/girl to reassure someone who has low self esteem that they truly are most important than they realise at the moment... some guys won't put time or effort into this cos their attention is only 1 thing... to get what they want...
    some will but draw the line at some effort...
    where as the ones who are willing to accept you for who you are... they will have an endless supply of love and will without conditions treat you like you are the only woman in the world

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  • it depends mostly which gender you are. for women its a huge turn off if a man is not confident but men would not necessarily be turned off by that if it was a girl

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Most Helpful Girls

  • I don't know if it's a "big" turnoff, but it's also hardly attractive. People with low self-esteem tend not to care for their appearance too much, also they are often introverted and afraid to say anything wrong, which makes them less fun to hang out with

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    • Thank you for your comment!

  • I’d say that women with low self esteem will more often than not just be used by men. Men with low self esteem are less likely to be dated for a long time by girls.

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    • So to answer your question: yes it’s unattractive in both genders.

    • Reality is sad and people are selfish but there's nothing we can do about it just to accept and be strong. Thank you fur the comment by the way

    • You’re right, and you’re welcome.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • yes it is but you can improve that with time

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  • For me yes. I can’t stand when people are always downplaying themselves rather than owning up and moving to improve themselves they already have the realization of the problem they just need to fix it now. I find it very annoying when a girl is always putting herself down, I’d rather have a girl more structured and sound than that.

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  • yes, I met a gal other day who seems all happy on the outside, but probed and her low self esteem came out. The problem is ,... you give them what you have, something postiive and it goesinto their mind and it has no value because they diminish it. Noone can prop up another human being like that and be successful, would kill a guy to not have reciprocation. So yes, it's a problem and you need to work on it. That gal was in her 40's.

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  • It is not desirable or pleasing, but I don't think low self-esteem alone would ever be a major deal breaker or turn-off in someone.

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    • It's true trust me I'm serious when I wrote this, guys r wild theses days a guy literally stopped pursuing me bc I have low self esteem Imao

    • One guy. Not all guys.

  • USUALLY men don't have problems with girls of low self esteem...

    The other hand girls USUALLY are not interested in men with low self esteem

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    • To be sincere I find it cute 😊

    • Show All
    • Yes, by far... they are some that accept me for who I am but either to get laid or they don't take seriously

    • USUALLY men want to feel strong and stronger than their woman... They're not looking for someone who could be an opponent

  • If you make a flag out of it, or keep complaining about your looks/personality/other stuff about yourself, yes it is.

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  • It isn't really a huge turn off to me because I'd be willing to help my partner improve their self-image but it takes a lot of work and I'm probably only willing to do it because I'm not super super busy.

    But if you're constantly bringing yourself down and it's obvious that my efforts aren't helping, I'm giving up. I tried my best.

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  • Yes it is even if you are a female!

    But a lot off females tries to get away with it and people reinforce it that they should.

    People should choose what they may see fitt them not what others aspects.

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  • Just try to smile :) and do your best. I am like you <3

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    • Awe thank you 💜 we can do it! Let's be strong!

  • What do you mean low self-esteem? if you mean constantly a person who needs reassurances, it's a big NO.

    if it's rarely or in hard times, no it's not a problem.

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  • No, but I've talked wit ha girl who put "..." after almost every single thing she typed. Infuriating. I mention this cause she did have some low self esteem.

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    • OMG I hate it when people write ‘...’ sooooo much omg I had a friend who did it it was so annoyingggg like what does that even mean?

  • Not necessarily. I think it depends on the way you work on your issues more.

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  • Not really. I've found that people with low self-esteem are usually more down to earth and in touch with reality. They're more sensible as well.

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  • Yes, having low self esteem is a huge turn off for myself. It is not my job to reassure you. I’d feel like his mother. If someone doesn’t feel good enough it definitely shows and you can feel in your interactions with that person. It begins to be this big task to reassure them and I feel as if I have to walk on eggshells around them. Most of the time people like this are just big ol’ attention seekers. Maybe I feel so strongly about this is because I’m a confident person myself.

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  • My girlfriend and me take turns as who's the one with low self-esteem.
    We lift each other' spirit up and always make each other feel better.

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  • To a certain extent, but I think men are a lot more accepting of it than women are so it probably isn't that big of a deal.

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  • I prefer confident men, but low self-esteem is certainly not a turn off.

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  • if a guy has it its the biggest turn off. if a girl has it, its slightly more tolerable but if she becomes too needy or desperate for reassurance it get be annoying

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  • Not a turn off for me but hard for me to handle. Dated a guy once who had low self esteem. I tried to help him but he just didn't have any belief in what i said no matter how much I tried.

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  • absolutely the biggest problem with any relationship

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  • Nah it’s fine to me doesn’t really change wether or not I like someone

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  • Not really, it's something that can be fixed and receiving some love goes a long way

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  • Nope i like men with low esteem, they can be my baby easily

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  • "Im so dumb tho :d" dumb girl says
    "Your the best thing in the world" white knight says

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    • A guy dedicating his life getting you off is not love.

    • Really? Damn I really think I should work on my self before jumping on a relationship again

  • Yes. If you aren't willing to try to be who could be than I have no time for you.

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  • Not a turn off. Just a little annoying.

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  • Yes it's a turn off.

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  • Not in woman but it is in men

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    • Nah it doesn't work like that men and women are equal

    • woman almost always need someone confident..

  • Not too me. I have a low self esteem anyway

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  • I wouldn't say "big" but it's definitely not good

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  • Mostly if you're a guy.

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  • Very big turn off for me

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  • To me... yes

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  • Yea.

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  • It can be..

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  • 1000%

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  • Not Big.

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  • Nahh

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  • Yes, it is

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  • Not to me

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  • depends...

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  • More guys will overlook it than women

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  • and annoying

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  • Not really

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  • It's a massive turn off

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  • Nope. Not a big deal

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  • nope not for me.

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  • not for me

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  • huge. really is. hugs

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  • i dont care if she has low self esteem

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