How can I get more luck from dating apps?

So I've used quite a few dating apps (tinder, bumble, badoo, plenty of fish and okcupid) and I've had some success (my ex was from okcupid) but I don't seem to get that many matches or messages back especially on the more casual apps like bumble or badoo.

I have a variety of photos, some with company most just selfies. I have a bio which is appropriately long for whichever app I'm using. If they have a bio I read it and try and send them a compelling first message (normally quite hard to do). But I just don't get many likes or responses back (for bumble I've had 1 for example).

If it's a looks issue then there's little I can really do. So what can I do to get more matches?
Am I the only one that feels like they're "shouting into the void"?

Girls do you have this problem too or is it the opposite? Do you feel like you have to wade through an ocean of dick pics?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think the reason that happens is because (for me at least) a lot of guys message so the woman has like 100+ dudes to pick from and when I get loads of messages I only reply to ones that stand out instead of the typical "hi, how are you" also i reply to the hottest ones and at the end i ignore all cause too many messages gets annoying and I just end up deleting the app

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • I wish there was something I could say to help you, with no experience on dating apps I wouldn't know where to begin really.
    All I can say is keep trying don't get discouraged.

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    • That's not terribly helpful but thanks anyway

    • I have a girlfriend who tried dating apps for awhile she was always getting dates.
      It might be easier for girls or a matter of getting lucky.

    • I suspect that its easier for girls, at least there's options anyway. How engaging those options are I don't know

  • you aren't bad looking, but the photo and how you communicate may spell doom.
    best advice, I went out and met some women recently, I got to where we discussed online dating and I watched how she uses it. It takes almost nothing to shoot a guy down. learn this from the other viewpoint and then make adjustments, find some females who will help. So, go out and meet women in pesron, learn to build that rapport and dynamic, that will pay huge dividends.

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  • A funny bio goes a long way in deciding whether to respond or not. You can tell how someone looks, but a funny bio shows you have personality, before even having to message to find that out. If you say you like rock climbing or travelling, you may also wish to have your photos match the bio so that it's more evidence to go off of

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  • You could go outside and learn how to communicate with other humans

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  • I don't use dating site since they don't have any learning disabilities. I have tries some dating site. Didn't have. Didn't have good luck. I used social media in my town in UK.

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  • Don’t ask for nudes, don’t be an asshole who wants only sex. Try to appease for their taste

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  • dating apps actually make dating harder i think Go do i tin person and meet people. It takes so much confusion and indecision out of it

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  • Tragically, no matter what women here will tell you, it boils down to looks. That's just the harsh truth.

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  • l hate all dating sites all full of germs and STDs and baggage they can all get stuffed full of cheats

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  • You don't. However, It's better not to go searching. It's when you don't search things come to you.

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  • Shave, don't smile like bugs bunny, get less "I spend my life as a desk jockey/basement dweller" nerd glasses. And most importantly, don't worry too much and have some fun with it. You're not much younger than myself so you're bound to make mistakes like moi. If it's a confidence thing, that will come with time. It comes to everyone differently but don't confuse confidence with cockyness. It all takes time so don't worry too much about it. I'm no where near the most attractive person on online dating apps and I still get matches and what not. It's all about your delivery with what you say and how you reply.

    Good luck!

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    • You started out so mean but actually ended it with some genuinely good advice so thanks! Also can't loose the glasses need them to see haha

    • I like to throw a curve ball into the field from time to time. But like I said man, dont worry so much. If it's meant to be, it'll be. Good luck with your dates. Give em one from me. 😂

  • By being a woman 😂🤣..

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  • girls on dating apps are bored looking for attention want a quick fling or want something but only go for the hot stuff.

    PS you are shouting into the void mate.

    Best advice is a nice short bio that is quick to read. Girls don't like reading a long bio and want a connection more than what you both like.

    10,000 is like 10 replies back at best.

    I suggest going in person and meeting people. Then its more like 1 in 1000.

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  • Become attractive.

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  • Just keep on trying. :)

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  • A lot of girls are on dating apps for fun, most of the ones that aren’t will only go for men in the top 20% looks wise, you will have a lot more success if you spend an hour or two just going around your local city, asking girls out in person because women in real life have a look more to judge you on than just your looks

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    • Ah yes but I'm a shy introvert, I don't go out on the town often either. Also I'm a coward😂

    • Show All
    • You think you don’t have a good personality? Or do you think your shyness is holding your personality back because it’s a big difference

    • I dunno thats really deep question 😂

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