If a guy I've been dating for 2 1/2 years, have been invited to go to New York.

He has been invited by a friend who is in the music business , who is trying to help him meet some big name stars that are in the music business. The friend is a women and is paying for everything. I am very uncomfortable with the whole situation. Please let me know if I should be or not?

The guy I'm dating states if I want to meet this friend that I can, sould I take his offer and meet this women?


Most Helpful Girl

  • There is nothing wrong with you feeling uncomfortable. Feelings are true and pure and you should not fight against your feelings.

    Now, as far as what you think will happen, that is another story. I am assuming your are concerned that he may end up connecting to this girl, considering she is being highly supportive in so many ways, much like a girlfriend would be. Whether that happens or not, who is to say, but that the possibility of something happening makes you uncomfortable, sure, I get that.

    The only advice I would give is that you need to just ride this out. I think it is good to share your feelings with your partner, because that is what partners are for, though I notice you say you are dating him, not that he is your boyfriend, so I am unsure of the exact nature of your relationship. But beyond sharing that you are uncomfortable, there isn't anything that you or he can say that will change what could happen. If your relationship is strong and he is truly connected to being with you, you will be fine. However, if he is really connected to his potential music career, he may be less likely to maintain the connection with you that is needed to stay together. Best of luck!

    • I really appreciate your comment. I really just don't know the motive of this girl and that's the real issue. He did say if I want to meet her that is fine with him, but I don't want to look like I'm insecure about myself or don't trust him. Do you think she actually could be a friend that is really trying to help him?

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    • should I take upon his offer and meet her or don't do it?

    • I would say check in with your motives before you decide to meet her or not meet her. Don't operate from a motive that is not the best. In other words, don't make a choice based off of trying to figure her out, or psych her out or psych this guy out. Try to get to the point that you can make a choice without a motive of anything you would be less than happy to own. Our motives actually do come shining through even when we think we are hiding them, so get right with yourself then decide.

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