What burning questions about love, dating and relationships do you have for Dating Expert, Coach T Anthony? LIVE EVENT see details below?

What questions do you have on love, dating or relationships?
What questions do you have on love, dating or relationships?
Dating expert, Coach T Anthony answers all your burning questions on Love, Dating and Relationships. Ask your questions below and the Coach will answer them LIVE on GAG Wednesday, April 17th, 2019 between 6 and 8pm EST.

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Twitter @coachTanthony

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  • I have a usual question but I might add detail as the convo goes. ( if I’m lucky that is :)

    Ok here goes: my songs teacher is telling my son n sometimes other kids ( 3-6 yr olds) making a drama mockery out of it :
    Where I’m one of the kids running after him and holding themselves kissing and self holding ( maybe just telling my son only I can’t know). It represents me apparently ‘chasing’ him.
    This is after 3 months of not talking. So he wrote on Monday ‘just know I care for your son you may reach out to me.” I said sorry as we had a tiff about a trivial issue that soon turned into ‘him saying I’m suggesting dating him.”

    Now after 3 months of no contact and being formal, I find it resurfaced again.

    Oh by the way is important to note my ex boyfriend a journalist leaked some topless pics and one in a rip racing bust enhancing cheetah dress. I had once included that guy on a Christmas card sent to only my sons class parents, families and his teacher.

    One day I saw his teacher look at me in wide eyed glee. As he checks mails early morning I don’t.
    I might a few minutes later but we re all in a rush to get ready for the day. I’m in a race to the finish line.

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  • How do you keep faith that you’ll find it soon enough if you’re trapped living in your parents house because of epilepsy?

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    • 20h

      Find what soon enough?

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    • 19h

      We have strong communication. I’m on prescribed medication with side effects like memory loss making it impossible to go places on my own. It’s the only thing keeping me away from seizures, and the doctors say they’re working hard to reduce the side effects, but it’s still not enough yet. Because the only one in my family who can drive is my dad, and he’s busy with work 24/7, I have no means of transportation. No one seems able to help me.

    • 9h

      Well okay I understand you have a shitty deck of cards that has been handed to you. You still need to stay strong, stay hopeful and keep pushing forward. Do you earn money? You need to think outside the box. There are always people out there looking to help. I don't know how severe your epilepsy is so I can't really give you advice on what to do. Only you can navigate your life.

  • I guess I missed the deadline :(

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    • 21h

      I am still rocking and rolling!

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    • 20h

      Thank you! That was really helpful!!

    • 20h

      NP anytime!

  • my ex boyfriend hurt me by pranking me on April fools day he's been begging but i just wanna forget about it and move but i can't cause i still love him

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  • Do leagues exist? How do you tell what league you're in if they do? I get rejected by every woman i ask out. Not one, not a few, every single woman. That's not to say i never get hit on by women. But they're women i'm not even remotely attracted to.
    I can't pretend to be attracted to someone i find repulsive. Sorry.

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    • 1d

      Don't give up man. Leagues do exist and you might be trying to climb a fence that you have no business climbing at least in their eyes. So just know that but don't let it discourage you. It might just take a bit longer to pull off!

  • 1.) How to express attraction to white men?

    I completely clump into a ball if a white man tries to talk to me, or I see a handsome guy. The first fear I feel is my race will instantly turn him off. People dont grasp that black women have been considered the ugliest race of women, being referred to as apes and coons since we were brought over way when. We look so different from the perfect white woman icon, that I have a hard time believing a white guy would consider me over their pretty white women.

    It always gets the best of me, and I can't open up enough to flirt or show interest.

    White guys have expressed a similar fear, that we may not like them due to black men being bigger and flashier.. so me not being open enough, probably makes an interested white guy, think Im not 😒

    I feel really pretty, but never pretty enough for them. My personality is docile mostly, but I do have that black girl flare and fiestiness too. So Im thinking he is going to think Im ghetto and be embarassed.

    Its really hard. No one seems to get what it feels like to have many bad stereotypes hovering around you, being insecure about your racial features, and loving the exact opposite of what you're supposed to.

    What can I do?

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    • 19h

      I tell you exactly what to do. Just give me a call. I'm a good looking and sexy white guy that never been with a black girl but always fantasized about it. Black girls are really sexy in my opinion.

    • 6h

      First you have to stop beating yourself up. You are assuming way to much and when you do that... it becomes a self fulling prophecy. I am not saying that your findings are not true but they aren't true in every case. Just because it could go that way doesn't mean it will. So you need to decide if what you have said here today is going to stop you from pursuing what you want?

      My personal opinion... these are really small obstacles to overcome. There are many white men who find black women sexy... more then you know. I am sure there are some who don't but you can't let the ones who don't stop you from finding the ones who do... right?

  • My mother said that if you are in love, you will just know. I think I am but i dont think i would THINK im in love, if i were in love. How do I know? Sometimes I feel like im really cold and incapable of love and when my relationships end, its usually because I scare myself thinking of a future with that guy and I dont want him in my future si I end up breaking up with the dudes and sometimes they ARE in love with me. In my last relationshio I stayed with him because I wanted to love him but in the end I couldnt. Is something wrong with me? Or have I just not found the right one or what?

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    • 6h

      My grandpa told me when I was 12 years old that "You can't help who you love... you just do." That stuck with me my entire life and I sure as hell felt that way for a few women. If I had to guess you just haven't met the right guy yet. You know how people say I have never felt like this before? it's true and you will say the same thing.

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    • 6h

      I think you know but are just over thinking it. Stop doing that. lol

    • 1h

      lmao probably

  • I might be too late, but here goes nothing.

    I don't have a problem dating, but rather I have the opposite problem: I can't make it last. And I know why.

    I have had committed relationships with six people, all of them mentally unwell. All of the people I fall for are as well, and this weird 'type' of mine is affecting me in a bad way, constantly.

    How do I break out of my type, and start dating people who would be good for me instead?

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    • 1d

      Easy by cutting them off in the beginning when the red flags appear. People always ask me why they attract the wrong people. My answer is always the same. Everyone can have a bad date or relationship but the ones who are successful cut those people off before it gets too far. You don't attract the wrong people, you just allow the wrong people to stay too long. So stop doing that... cut them off quick... then keep looking for the ones that are what you really want.

    • 17h

      Thank you, coach.

  • How much does money matter in a relationship?

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  • What makes men fail to commit to someone they date / hookup with exclusively for over a year but then call the next girl their girlfriend withing weeks?

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    • 1d

      Hooking up or dating

      Hooking up as an just sex if so that's why

      Dating for over a year is committed

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    • 1d

      Spot on with those 12 points.
      You probably doing the same thing to guys with in the same criterias without being aware of it.

    • 5h

      They fail to commit because they really just ain't feeling it. So what they do is hang on to you until they find someone else they do feel it with. It's sad but true.

  • How to escalate with a girl if I don't have my own house or any privacy?

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  • How important is having sex to decide on a 1st date that whether we should move to the 2nd date or not or in other words to see the compatibility of the person should we go for sex on 1st date

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    • 1d

      Having sex is not that important in the beginning when you are trying to get to know someone. General compatibility is what people are looking for when they are dating. Sexual compatibility comes later much later.

      What happens if you have sex on the first date and deem yourself compatible? What happens when it turns out you really don't like the guy. I think you have it backwards.

    • 16h

      hmm yea i understand what you are saying

  • How do you get your ex back if you lost her trust?

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    • 23h

      You can't really get her back. All you can do is acknowledge you messed up and wish her well. Then make sure you become a better man by fixing the shit that needs to be fixed. Maybe after all that she will see you in a different light and hit you up. Anything else like begging or trying to make promises never works. It's awkward and creepy and it's not a long lasting solution.

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    • 9h

      I rather private message you and tell you the full story if my fuck up

    • 8h

      Sure it would give me more context!

  • Why do we crown other human beings as experts on anything? What is our need to look up to others? Is it some failed part of the self?

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    • 1d

      Nobody is an expert on everything including us and that's exactly the reason why sometimes we ask other human beeings for their advice. It's not about looking up to them because I'm sure that there are instances when that same human being needs advice in different circumstances.

    • 1d

      You mean I am supposed to have a crown? Nobody told me that.

  • What am I doing wrong?

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    • 1d

      I’ve gotten skinnier, learned about game, I’ve been working on my passion for photography, asked out a couple of girls, but out of the 5 or 6 girls I’ve tried. Only one I’ve gone to a instant date. (which means it happened right after I met her)

    • 23h

      So 1 out of 5 went on a date with you? You know how many guys would kill for a ratio like that? Dude expect to get rejected a lot. The more you try the more of chance you have too. I know guys who go out every night for a month and have gotten laid maybe twice with two different girls. Again, for most guys they will take it! Each month though gets better and better as you get better and better at your craft. You need to have some patience. It's a numbers game man.

  • Yeah, Anthony! I wanna know why I need a dating expert to help me run my failing relationship? It's gonna fail regardless unless you do a miracle

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    • 23h

      You might have to DM me with some context. I can say though I am not a miracle whip worker! LOL

  • When a girl that you used to be close with who was hugging you and you her, chasing you and asking for going with you for a walks, who you start ignoring and becoming distant starts flirting and chasing your best friend after some time infront of you... Does it mean that she is trying to make you jealous or she just doesn't care about you and likes that boy and you are trying to make everything about you?

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    • 23h

      Dude I am not a psychic ! I have no idea... it could go either way. The important thing is.. you should never worry about little things like that and always just go after what you want. It's much easier to be rejected and understood then lie around in the background playing mind games with yourself.

  • Are there any benefits to dating a single mother?

    Simples...

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  • How to convince your finance/husband to not financially help his family and also not act like a husband for his mother?
    I make sacrifices for us and I don't want to be in doubt every time that he meets his family about what they are going to ask this time and will he act on our best interest or theirs.

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    • 1d

      My guess is that you knew this was going on before you married the guy? Right? If this is all of a sudden a shocker then you didn't do your homework. Men who act like husbands to their mothers isn't something they can hide very well.

      So now instead of putting your husband down as if he is not a worthy provider... you need to take some responsibility for ignoring this volcano and sit him down like adults and discuss it without the negative bitterness. Calmly let him know how you feel and what your concerns are. What other choice do you have?

  • What's the secret to dating half your age?

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    • 23h

      LOL I would only assume you really need to look half your age to really make that work.

    • 18h

      I felt bad in the beginning. Her being seventeen years my younger. Now that we are older I wonder what was the secret. She has stopped calling me old man. It is a beautiful friendship now. Your probably right, I don't look my age.

  • Do you consider that learning to love is important to find a partner?

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    • 23h

      I would need more context. Not sure what that even means. Maybe it's just the wording.

  • How can I tell if someone is into me? I've been single for quite a while but I keep hearing about people I used to know that we're dying to get with me. And in that case why didn't they just ask me out?

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    • 23h

      Women don't usually ask men out that is why. I am assuming you are speaking about women if not please correct me. My advice is to not worry about so much if they are into you and how to recognize it... but to recognize that if you are into someone that you take action on it. No sense in waiting around for a burning bush.

    • 23h

      I was talking about both genders but no harm done. Thank you 😁

  • How do you know if you're being too forward and still in the friendship stage?

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    • 23h

      Because they will feel awkward or pull away then you will know. Once they start acting like a girlfriend around you with those types of triggers then you will know they would like to be more. You must try and make it known to them how you feel. You need to avoid all this confusion and just find out.

    • 23h

      Huh interesting. I'm going for it tomorrow 😂

  • how to get better at approaching

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    • 23h

      By going out every night and doing it. Approaching is never really the issue... it's the approach anxiety that holds people back. The more you do it the more you can feel comfortable in any situation or destination.

  • What are your thoughts on marriage

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    • 23h

      It's not for everybody and in my opinion it doesn't mean as much as it used too.

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    • 22h

      How and why?;

    • 22h

      If you are a gager with an influencer badge your questions, polls, mytakes automatically get promoted to the front page where obviously you will get more opinions and such. I have also created an audience since 2015 that follow me and like to engage with me so it's really a mixed bag.

  • Is it fine to marry a Man 7 years older than you?

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    • 2d

      Yes it is absolutely fine but take into consideration how your future will be if you marry him
      It all depends on how true , strong your love for each other is

    • 2d

      @cutie3000 Right.
      Thanks.

    • 1d

      Thanks for your question.

      Age isn't really that much of a factor unless you are talking like 20 years difference. In my opinion, 7 years is just fine.

  • My boyfriend goes through these random periods where he gets a bit distant from me for a few days which he explains as "to recompose himself when he gets a bit too emotional". What does that mean?

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    • 2d

      I had a boyfriend like that at a certain point, what he’s trying to tell you is that he is bottling some feelings of hurt and other stuff , emotional trauma , some thing that happened in his childhood and deeply affected him but he had to act strong and unaffected at that time but now those feeling are coming back to haunt him
      As his girlfriend , since you love him , it’s your job to address this issue because it’s your right to know and help in every way you can if your love for him is indeed true you will persevere no matter how long it takes
      He has to be able to tell you even his darkest secrets and deepest fears and you should help him through it
      Be strong girl , you can do it

    • 1d

      It sounds like he has an anger issue.

    • 1d

      I don't know but I would just let you in on a little guy secret. All men need some alone time, guy time, video game time, hang with bros time, etc etc. So just do your thing and let him be for a while. He needs to do man stuff. Just my guess.

  • How does one convince a woman that she does not actually know everything that can possibly be known about everything?

    How does one convince a woman that gaslighting is not to be done to everyone in her life?

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    • 23h

      You never try and convince sociopaths of anything. You recognize that they are a sociopath and get the fuck out there. There is no reason to converse with one... none.

  • Why does old flame still light me on fire?
    I am happily married, but when I hear his voice, it makes me weak

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    • 5h

      Because the flame was once strong and that is hardwired into our memories either by voice, smell or appearance. I remember dating this one woman and we hung out in Starbucks a lot. I mean a lot... so now everytime I go to Starbucks I can't help but to think of her.

  • How do I fuck a crush without getting attached too her? A few months ago she was open & kinda suggested we keep our companionship more than friends. I kinda lost touch with her within the last week. I would like want too move on.

    It's more for future reference now.

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    • 22h

      Easy don't fuck crushes if you aren't prepared to possibly get attached. Unless you really want to have awful sex because you are trying so hard to not get attached LOL.. that wouldn't be fun.

  • Why are teenage boys only capable of wanting to stick their junk in girls instead of having a meaningful relationship?

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  • If you notice a girl noticing you, but you noticed her first, is her notice just incidental or is she trying to convey something super subtle?

    Follow up question: if she notices you but doesn't do anything, is she not interested or trying to not come off as interested for fear of looking desperate?

    Second follow up question: if she doesn't want to appear desperate and ignores you hoping that you'll get the hint to make a move, what sorts of cosmic signs should a guy be looking for?

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    • 1d

      Hey thanks for the Q,

      Everything you have mentioned could possibly happen. Do I know which is which? No. People act different ways with different looks and glances during different times and on different days.

      My advice has always been to use the 3 second rule. If you are attracted to them... approach them within 3 seconds. If you stand around contemplating what this glance means or what that look is for... you will end up being the creepy guy in the corner staring at people all night. Make it easy and just GO IN!

  • Why would a guy show heaps of interest then gradually fade? If he's lost interest then how do I best deal with him trying to come back around aside from ignoring him?

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    • 2d

      Sometimes guys like the challenge and the chase.
      Once they know you're interested, they may lose interest

    • 1d

      So does the same thing go for women?

    • 1d

      You never have to ignore them... you should just not give any of your energy towards them. Always be cordial. Never let them see you sweat. That's an old 80's pun.

  • Is it normal that I feel like if I got a boyfriend he'd leave me for a girl who's better than me eventually? I asked myself why I'm I so willing to have a open relationship with a dude and I realized I did because I'm worried that he won't be happy with just having sex with me...

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    • 2d

      You're worthy girl!!! Please love yourself and get self esteem.

    • 1d

      Hey thanks for the Q,

      You will see this as a common answer i give about self esteem. "Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have." Having standards is attractive. Your value doesn't decrease based on the inability of others to see your worth but you must feel worthy yourself for that to be true.

      If he's not happy having sex just with you then he isn't the right one. EVER! Trust me... you are more then enough for the right guy but you need to feel that you are so work on that.

  • Why is sexting so important to guys and how can I find a guy who isn’t just after sex right away? Should I start going to church and try to meet a guy there?

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    • 1d

      It's not

    • 5h

      You need to cut them off when the bad behavior appears which is usually in the very beginning. Most women don't and just chalk it up to men being men but then complain when they keep allowing the behavior to continue. Have standards and just keep moving forward until you find the right one. Don't lump all men together because they are not all the same.

  • Do you believe that dating is not marriage?

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    • 1d

      Dating is not marriage but you might be asking should married people stop dating each other? If so the answer is no. Married people should always keep dating to keep that spark alive. This is why it's so important that married couples get date night every week.

    • 21h

      Of course. I'm sorry I did not specify. I meant should they sleep together, share the expenses of large purchases together, live together, etc. Before marriage? Even have kids?

    • 21h

      A committed relationship is just that... a committed relationship so the answer is sure why not. Now if you believe marriage or that piece of paper somehow makes you more committed "which I do not" then get married.

  • What should anyone consider before developing a friendship with an ex?

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    • 3d

      *Not necessary little after the breakup, it could be after years.

    • 22h

      The only reason to develop a friendship with an ex is because you have children together. I mean do you really have time to be friends with an ex? Move on cleanly.

    • 22h

      True.

  • Why would a guy make it clear he’s interested in one girl (a female friend who is also very clearly interested) and then ask out another (stranger he met online)?

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    • 2d

      Because he is not so interested on her (the friend) I think.

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    • 1d

      How much do you put in to the mix (huch effort, investment do you contribute with) ?

    • 1d

      I don't know how clear it was if what happened happened? Right? Or the guy is just spinning plates. Don't really know.

  • Yeah... No. Just by your picture alone, you have nothing to coach me about.

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  • I remember one time you answered my question and I didn't take your advice and you turned out to be right. Seems like you know what your talking about.

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    • 22h

      Hey thanks man! Why didn't you take the advice?

    • 21h

      Cause I was stupid lol. My own stubbornness got the best of me. It was about the girl at work. I don't know if you remembered. You told me to play it cool and just become friends first and I moved to fast on here. Oh well no need to dwell in the past.

  • You're like those gurus who feel a need to help others to help themselves.

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  • the girl I had a crush on in the past never responded back that she likes me but one day suddenly she bought her friend along and stood in front of me nervously. she wanted to talk to me about something but I was in a hurry and ignored her. any guesses what she might have wanted to say to me?

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    • 5h

      if I have time really I would have listened to her. some expert love coach you are. disappointed in your answer. at least I would have liked to listen to your guess. i already stated that it happened in the past.

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    • 4h

      sorry about that my actions too. i'm serious when it comes to dating and love. Thank you for the advice. she's out of my league and didn't respond to my feelings. so when she came with her friend suddenly i kind of felt weird. still, i miss her. it happened in the past. i couldn't get it out of my head what she wanted to tell me that day and so i asked. I respect you now. Thank you very much for your reply once again.

    • 4h

      Again, sorry dude! No bad intentions here! Hit me up anytime!

  • I guess the biggest question for me is: how do you find anyone to date? XD everyone is taken except fat single moms apparently. I'm not superficial but I do have standards.

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    • 22h

      Try harder. Women you desire won't just appear out of the blue sky.

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    • 7h

      Yes that is how it's done. If you go out 3 or 4 times a week and still can't find anyone you feel is suited for you then your standards and ego are way too high. You need to be realistic and know that quality is more then just looks it's the entire person's personality, values and standards. And that doesn't mean date ugly chicks.. this is not black and white. It means it's a numbers game and if you don't have the numbers then you won't win.

    • 6h

      ok fair enough. thanks.

  • This is so exciting! I've never watched a GAG interview or a live event that happened on here! While I know you're going to get a lot of questions regarding dating in general, I had a few questions about relationships I wanted to hear your perspective on. Feel free to pick any number of them that's interesting for you to answer! If there is a question here that someone already asked, feel free to skip it if it's going to be answered anyways:

    1) In terms of compatibility, what information should you know from your partner or the person you're dating to determine if you can have a happy long-term relationship/marriage with them or not?

    2) Do you believe a lack of education has anything to do with marriage percentages dropping in the USA over the past 15 years?

    3) If you set your expectations for a partner too high and can't find anyone after a good period of time, should you still keep your expectations high to avoid complications in the relationship you want to pursue or should you lower them to have more options for a potential date available to you?

    4) Is it possible to live a life without a relationship; without becoming an emotionally bitter person from a lack of personal affection/love to give and receive from a special someone you romantically want to be with?

    5) When it comes to meeting someone online who lives nearby for a potential date, would it be better to get to know them through conversations by text messaging and video/voice chat first before the first date happens in person or would it be better to simply meet and learn about them in person first?

    6) What do you believe the main reason is for all the people that cheat in relationships? Does it have to do with a lack of compatibility with their partner or commitment in general?

    Thank you for your time reading this! I look forward to the event coming up and seeing which questions you'll answers for the community around here :)

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    • 3d

      Update:
      Pardon the idea that I thought this was going to be a LIVE video interview! Anthony corrected me to ensure I wasn't confused with the situation. He'll simply be around GAG to answers questions in live time when the time comes! In the meantime, continue with the questions as planned!

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    • 6h

      Yeah we will see ! I have many ideas of what we could do here on GAG so I will have to collaborate with the Grand Poobah of GAG and see if we can't get those ideas implemented.

    • 5h

      That'll be exciting if any of them gets implemented because having variety in this site is always a good thing! I wish you best of luck in that regard :)

  • I am switching schools next year any advice to get a good relationship with a guy like a boyfriend?

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    • 1d

      Join as many social activities that you can stomach. These activities gives you an in on what you have in common with someone and when you have something in common it's easy to chat about that subject.

    • 20h

      Thanks so much (:

  • Why won't guys approach me? I'm attractive and nice but I never get any guys talk to me

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    • 3d

      Do you approach them?

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    • 1d

      Many reasons why this is happening. So until you figure it out why don't you just start approaching the men you like?

    • 21h

      Thank you

  • How do you know if you're ready for a relationship?
    How do you get your girlfriend to completely open up to you?

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    • 22h

      You are ready for a relationship when you are prepared to put others above yourself. Your girlfriend needs to feel as if she can trust you so you need to give her that space to feel that. Don't force it.. she will come around.

  • COACH- what do you do when you get stood up for a date? How u move on and not hate men?
    Asking for a friend 😥

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    • 3d

      Do not hate men, hate that man.

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    • 1d

      but I am afraid to go put myself back out there!! its so mean!

    • 1d

      "When you pray for rain sometimes you have to deal with the mud." Facts. Get back out there and don't take it so personal. Laugh it off... it's God's way of saying.. he ain't for you.

  • Why i love so hard, how to make it easier?
    Who came up with the idea to pair completely oppositely designed minds so they are close, intimate, have to communicate and work through stresses of life together.. for 30-50 years? Were they nuts or is it part of a grander plan? Like... why would nature evolve to do that when it seems counter intuitive?

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    • 3d

      Because it's not about intuition, it's about procreating.

    • 1d

      Hey thanks for the Q,

      Mother nature is very powerful in getting humans to procreate. What mother nature is not is a relationship counselor. She doesn't know or care about what two people she pushes together. That is why once the fuzziness wears off, 3 kids later its' time for a divorce. Mother nature connects us to our partner in a very powerful way in the beginning. That wears off so in the beginning you need to get out of that cloud of desire and start comparing resumes for long lasting success.

      In the end, you need to follow your heart but take your brain with you. It never gets easier but you do get smarter along the way.

  • whats the ideal engagement length?

    1|4
    1|2
    • 3d

      I'm only commenting because who the fuck would put thumbs down to that hahaha thumbs up bam!

    • Show All
    • 1d

      Hey thanks for the question.

      According to the experts who did a 2015 Real Wedding Study, the average length of an engagement is 14.5 months—but that's just an average. You really have to consider everything like cost, location and notice to guests for your wedding. The ideal length considers all those factors.

    • 1d

      thanks coach!!!

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