I feel so depressed... Why do guys act distant after a 'breakup'?

It wasn't really a breakup.

I started dating this guy for a few months. We were so happy together, having affection, into each other, laughing and flirting... things went really well and we became serious. But only lately, everything started to change, he felt it was impossible for us to be together in the future.

We were faced with some personal problems, there was a 'gap' in between us that cannot close up. He told me it will be better if we were not together because feelings will be too strong and he felt that it will be harder to be separated.

I didn't say anything and choose to respect his decision because I too felt it was impossible for us. We agree to stay mutual and be friends BUT things became worse, he started acting cold, and rarely talk to me. When I asked him out, he agreed to but didn't say many words and sit there quietly. I felt upset and wonder why we can't be the same, like we used to be.

I don't understand why he has to act distant with me.

He wasn't dating with other girls. We were very close and will talk everyday. Why can't things remain the same?


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What Guys Said 2

  • its unbelievable how similarly identical my situation is.

    maybe as the girl, you could talk to him and communicate how you feel. Unless he has another girlfriend or something now. Otherwise just talk it through.

  • This may sound harsh, and I don't mean it to be, but you're no longer together. It will not be the same. In all honesty he is probably seeing someone else and doesn't want you to know, at risk of hurting your feelings. If you remain friends with him you will only be hurt. I think you should break all contact, unless you two are going to get back together. Although that is very unlikely, from how you've described his actions. He will be moving on and you will be still stuck on him, which isn't good. You need to get him off your mind for awhile and take up other interests/guys.


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