What do I do about this guy?

There's this guy I haven't talked to in ten years (since junior high and now we're out of college). We recently got back in touch, and when I agreed to hang out with him, I had no idea he was asking me out on a date because he was very subtle about it. But after I said that I'd hang out, he started sending me all these flirtatious messages. He's a great guy, very nice, cute, and I can tell he's committed in relationships.

There are a few problems, though:

(1) I'm still hung up on my ex (who hasn't spoken to me in over six months), and I'm afraid of hurting this guy who asked me out in the event that my ex ever decides to come back. This guy seems to be very sensitive about relationships, and the last thing I want to do is make him lose his faith. At the same time, I feel like I owe it to myself to try to move on. After all, my ex had no problem doing it two weeks after we broke up.

(2) I'm so incredibly busy because I'm in graduate school, and with my schedule, it's impossible for me to invest a lot in a relationship (at least until the summer).

(3) I'm as scared as hell to start dating again. My ex is the only guy I've ever been in a relationship with.

What would you do if you were in my situation?


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  • From the 3 reasons you gave, you might not be ready to be in a fully committed relationship, and you may want to be honest and upfront with the guy about it and just tell him why like you wrote it out here.