Here is a follow up question: what is the minimum that you must do before marriage (for you to be able to be in a relationship) kissing, oral, holding hands... where do you draw the line?
Would you date someone that wants to wait until marriage for sex?

Here is a follow up question: what is the minimum that you must do before marriage (for you to be able to be in a relationship) kissing, oral, holding hands... where do you draw the line?
- There is a girl I know and have a crush on. She is very beautiful and has these massive D cups. She is a singer in choir and helps the homeless. But she is super Catholic and wants to wait until marriage to have sex. I wanted to ask her out on a date but I won't. Having sex before marriage is non negotiable.
Not only is life too short, but you need to know if you are sexually compatible before marriage in order for it to be successful. as a relationship. I recently dated this black chic and her favorite position was doggy. She was sexy. D cups, skinny, look wise the whole thing. I broke up with her for other more personality reasons. But one huge factore was that my favorite position was missionary, not doggy. The chemistry was off. I wanted more of a slow sensual sex and she was more of a romance novel reading kinky agressive sex type of person. I am big and long and she wanted to be pounded from behind. I got bored with it because it was an impersonal position that didn't create the closeness I needed in order to orgasm. If we had gotten married it would have been miserable. I have had one ex girlfriend that I miss every single day. I wish we had married. The sexual chemistry was INSANE. We connected as one spiritual unit each time. I really miss her a lot. That chemistry could have kept us together through a lot if she hadn't have moved away.Is this still revelant?your not man enough to wait until marriage before you pounce on that big woman in the choir anyway
@MissDawn7961 no I am not a mangina whos going to get strung along and held out to dry. A real man has sex. Thats what we do. She 32 years old and will never have sex. She will be single forever. I waited 27 years and I refuse to do so again.
Buddy no offense but just a curious question... if you loved someone and if she says you can't have sex before marriage... will you break up with her?
I don't know what's love for you but surely the answer to this question may hint it.- Show All Show Less
@yoganshB YES. I would break up with her. If she isn't having sex with me then she is a friend, not a lover. Romantic lovers have sex. Thats what we are biologically born to do. Not doing that shows something is clearly wrong. Religious indoctrination against sex is clearly wrong. Its also disrespectful not to show love via the act of sex. Doesn't matter if its a marriage or not. without sex she is not in love and likely using me for money. Its dangerous to teach any man that they should be okay with a sexless engagement. millions of men will be manipulated have their wealth stolen.
Bro I'll just say-come to India. I bet you'll change your mindset after this. I can't explain you why what etc...
- No, I would NOT! I also would NOT buy a house without seeing it nor would I buy a car without test driving it!
What if she is boring or even terrible in bed (I've been with plenty of women who were BOTH bad, boring or terrible in the sack.
And if I didn't find out until AFTER wasting a lot of time with her and going through some $100K wedding, I'd be really pissed!
This also is NOT the year 1802!
People do NOT "wait til marriage" anymore!
That is just immature and childish!
Life IS way too short for puritanical nonsense!
Go out and ENJOY as much and as many as you possibly can before the games overIs this still revelant?
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- Yes, because that is what I believe in. Marriage is about sex, not happiness. So people complaining about a sexless marriage better do their research. Because studies have shown that people in most sexless marriages, unless illness take place, is because most of them had sex before marriage, and now they don't find it important anymore. Thats it's all about love. Nope. Sorry. When you're virgins, you make yourselves compatible because you have nothing to compare.Is this still revelant?
Annnd we have a winner! A girl who not only knows the truth but is smart enough to explain it! Hard nuff to find either gender that really gets this concept
Read some articles on the necessity of sex in marriage, male sexuality is at best treated with disdain. This is a way women can secure their marriage and their husbands.
- how'd you measure your physical chemistry if you do? I mean a lot often than not, sex is a major issues of filing for divorce.
Personally, I don't think virginity matters as long as you have trust and companionship (not to mention "true love")Is this still revelant? - Yes! Do you know how rare that is nowadays?
Believe it or not, most women are okay waiting for sex IF it's the right man.
We would experience our love and closeness in other ways.Is this still revelant?@Djaay Romance or intimacy (probably wrong choice of words on my part so apologies if that is confusing). For example, I am happy just cuddling, talking and having a good conversation, and making out! It does not always have to be about sex. Take things slow and connect with your partner in other ways.
And when said person is ready for sex: be it after marriage, or waiting a long period of time, it will be that much special for them
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44121- Hell no!
A liberated woman is one who has sex before marriage and a job after!ReactLike
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Hell no! A liberated woman is one who has sex whenever she's comfortable and ready, and doesn't succumb to the intense sexualization society puts on women.
@ryancreams STFU... I never said women should have sex before she is comfortable. Don't be an idiot.
I wasn't saying that you did but your response isn't even towards female empowerment, it's just because you'ra gross.
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@ryancreams You are uneducated... it's not even my response.. it's Gloria Steinem who said that so go take it up with her!
@ryancreams No you got caught going against actual "female empowerment" from someone who is all about female empowerment!
How about you recognize female empowerment instead of assuming and needing a liberal quote to back your dumb ass up with your uneducated thoughts on the matter. Get the fuck out of here.@ryancreams well you definitely talk like a 19 yr old. Sad. But you will learn as you get older.
- I did.
I would not do that again.
I happily waited for a year and a half during my prime sex years for this girl - I wanted to marry her and had no problem with it. Then she dumped me and gave me a bad broken heart. So, I basically stopped fucking for almost all of the past 31 years and having thrown-away my best sex years and sex life overall.
Furthermore, you never know about sexual chemistry until you have sex. You may be BFFs outside the bedroom, but if there's a mismatch in the bedroom, that's going to cause problems - and an unhappy unfulfilled marriage.
So, I would not advise anyone to wait for someone else.
It may be noble, but... I hate this phrase... YOLO. Fuck while you can because, one day, you can't.ReactLike
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- I would date her if she hasn't had sex before, and wants to wait. I used to think that it would be better to determine sexual compatibility first. But now I feel that's only important with sexually experienced people. I think waiting allows both people to strengthen the relationship in other ways instead of making sex a major feature of it. I'll admit waiting is problematic for me if she doesn't want to share other forms of intimacy (like holding hands, hugging, kissing).
It goes without saying that if she's had sex before with someone else but now decides she wants to wait with me, it won't work out.ReactLike
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In answer to the update: I would want other forms of affection including holding hands, cuddling, hugging, and kissing. I have good self-control so I know I won't try to escalate anything from doing these things. I can't say anything about the girl I might be with though.
I think of oral as part of, or a form of sex so I'll draw the line at oral. If she wants it though, I won't say no.
- While I think it's a good thing to wait, I'm not sure if I'm patient enough or has enough self-discipline to do it. I'm not interested in wasting money on weddings or sign documents either, because of I wants to do it my own way and use the money on traveling. I wants to see the world.
As long we takes the consequences of the pregnancy, gives the child a nice childhood if an accident happen and doesn't kill it, I guess it would be okay. Pre-material sex doesn't equal abortion or child abuse, although family planning, marriage etc. are recommended.
I don't want children, but I would welcome them to the world if the condom breaks and the pill fails at the same time.ReactLike
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- I used to think shacking up and playing house was a poor excuse for not getting married. But over the years I've come to realize that if you don't get the sex compatibiity thing right you sign yourself up for a lifetime of frustration and disappointment. And you really don't get to know someone - really know them - 'till you live with them. Their true nature comes out.
If you're waiting for sex 'till marriage for religious reasons then just find someone like-minded and plan it together.
For everyone else - choose wisely, treat kindly.
I wouldn't buy a pair of shoes without trying them. A woman? Marry her first? Oh, fuck no.ReactLike
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- I think it's a good idea to wait until marriage to have sex because of the possibility of having a kid, and also the psychological attachment that can happen is real and not a good thing when you're not in a stable marriage with someone. So I would want to date someone that feels the same wayReact
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- Why Just sex sex sex all the time. 70%+ things are all about sex. its just a part of life and a relationship. Don't give it that much importance. You have more topics to look into. Even after having tuns of debates you'll still be unsatisfied with sex but at least a single talk on other things is necessary. Your marrying a man not with his dick / you're marrying a women not with her pussy. Compatibility and such things are just too modern. If a cool guy marries a hot chick it doesn't necessarily mean that they are compatible if they're having a good sex. They may still be far from happy in their life. You are choosing a partner to love and to be loved not to fuck and to be fucked.🤷♂️React
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- Yes I would. But its hard to find nowadays
I am trying to wait until marriage now, but most of the women I meet expect it sooner.
I know if I have sex with them early i won't be able to control myself and will over do it.
I am always that way, then they treat me like a sex object. Thats all they want when they are with me.
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- The question is, in reality, do you honestly believe "waiting until marriage" still existing nowadays? I'm not so sure anymore but perhaps in some cultures away from civilization.
But yes we can. Abstinence of sexual intercourse before marriage is possible if and only if it is a mutual decision.ReactLike
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- Nah. I wouldn't mind dating for quite a while in order to get to know each other well before having sex. But before I married a girl, I would want to begin having sex with her at some point in order to be sure we were fully compatible.
I think women who want to save themselves for marriage have issues.ReactLike
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- Sex will happen , if your going to get married. If your to busy to wait then she or he is not right for you. There are ways to help his horny 😈 nature with out have sexual intercourse. As long as your will to help him or her with that part and still have the will power to not have sex then I think your relationship will last for a while. Cause your already working together towards a life goalReact
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- Oh my goodness, these males saying they wouldn't because they wouldn't first buy a car without test driving it. We aren't objects for your pleasure. I get that people want sexual chemistry and compatibility, but those things can be gauged by things like kissing and talking about it.
You can call me old fashioned, prude or whatever you like, but you're getting with a PERSON. If you love them, you'll wait, and it won't be when you have sex that it's like, "oh nup, you're not good enough" or "this sucks".ReactLike
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- If we really get along well, enough to be happy and not tried sex, why not?, the problem is some people have their quirks on bed, and some people expect something on bed that his/her couple might not give them, maybe you should talk about it and that enough, but I don't think is that big of a dealReact
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- Anonymous+1 yOf course. Sex is not a must have for me at all, so I wouldn't mind waiting. I also would need plenty of time to become comfortable with the guy first, and this would give me that opportunity. I've debated waiting until marriage, myself.React
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- As long as there is cuddling and other lovey-dovey stuff.
But I am an agnostic leaning atheist, so if it is religious reasons that might be a divide there, as I also enjoy having deep conversations which can be difficult if we have completely different views of everything.ReactLike
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- Nope, not my cup of tea. I love sex, it's not everything in a relationship, but I want to know if you're good in the sack or not, explore our sexual limits together. Bad sex is frustrating, and marriage can end in divorce if you don't have sexual compatibility, it's a legit reason and the courts will accept it as a reason to grant a divorce. But you do you, don't let anyone tell you what to do or not with your lifeReact
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You'd be surprised at how many people end a marriage because of sexual incompatibility. My own ended due to infidelity on my ex husband's part
- Wants to wait, or will wait?
I have dated women who told me on the first date they were virgins and saving themselves for their wedding night.
We were having sex within a couple of days.
It was easy for them to say they want to remain a virgin when they had never been aroused and alone with a guy. Put those two together, and their panties come down.ReactLike
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- For me it's not about what my religion tells me, but it's about curiosity. If my mind am always like, how would it be if I slept with her other than my girlfriend, this thought will never change even in marriage. But if you set your foundation without curiosity I don't think it can develop in your marriage. Some doors are best opened in marriage not before, by the way, divorce because of promiscuous is high.React
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- Anonymous+1 yI don't think I could because I need to know if he and I are sexually compatible if we aren't then the marriage wouldn't last I wouldn't want the same thing to happen as this couple
metro.co.uk/.../ReactLike
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- One of the WORST things you can do to a marriage. You can't teach compatability. There are some things you're just never going to be comfortable with. Sex is a very vital part of a relationship, esp when your young. You should know you are compatible in every way before attempting marriage. Marriage is already hard, I know, I was with my ex 25 years.React
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