I understand what you mean, but I think she's just teasing since she always checks my phone and almost never leaves me alone. We are always together
@Jean-Marie_Céline - are you really this **low** of self-esteem that you do not realize your fiancee is a controlling manipulative bitch who has roped you into an extreme example of an UNHEALTHY relationship. There is NOT ONE thing you mention about this woman or your relationship that is healthy. Not one thing. Narcissistic controlling individuals check their partner's phone. Narcissistic controlling individuals don't leave their partners alone. You are not a fiance, you are a PET.
I really hope she doesn't see me that way.My ex used to treat me like that and I hated it. Something that I admit worries me is that it seems she has started cutting out her own friends too. They were a very close group and I was starting getting close them, but she's started to cutting them out and getting curt with them.As for the marriage, I don't think we'll get married very soon as I don't feel ready for it. She doesn't exactly agree with this, but I made my point.
@Jean-Marie_Céline - her behavior of checking your phone is disrespectful. Her attitude & commentary towards you is disrespectful. What more do you need? I am not sure if she is mentally unsound or what - very possibly if she is cutting out her own friends - but if I were you I'd have shown her the door weeks ago.
I think she just doesn't want to have people between us.She told me she has done everything she wanted in life so now she's settling down.I tried to propose separate beds and no intimacy for a while, but it led to that very ugly quarrel last night.I can't tell her to go away since the place is hers and I have nowhere to go since my sister and my ex took over my old apartment.
Bruh, kick your ex and your sister out of that apartment, or have your name removed so you don't pay their rent. You aren't their guardian, they can grow up and take care of themselves. Take control of your life, you can move back into your old apartment and kick them out, or you can stop paying for the apartment entirely and save some extra cash so you can find a new place. Stop letting people screw you over.
@devilman666 if it's not them it will be someone else, so at this point I just accept it.I frankly don't see the need to look up to things or take action anymore, it's always the same in the end.
@devilman666 He's not going do that. He said a week or more ago he had come to the realization his relationship with his "fiancee" wasn't good & was gonna cancel it. The most he did was suggest separate beds & even that didn't work.
There's no point as it will be someone else if not them, and alone I could end up doing worse.At this point I just go on day by day and keep my head low. After all life is like that.
@Jean-Marie_Céline - no life isn't like that. Life is only like that for people who have no balls to stand up for themselves.
Then don't let anyone control you or take advantage, don't lend anyone money, don't help anyone unless they agree to return the favor in some way. If they don't follow through with their promises, stop talking to them. They are only able to take advantage of you because you allow them to.
It's not about not having balls, it's that I don't see the point in trying to change things. Everything I did ended up in failure. At least now I have a respectable and well paid job, live in a cozy apartment and I am with a beautiful and intelligent woman. I should be happy but I'm not, maybe the big problem is not her, but me.
The bigger problem is you, specifically your mentality that everything is your fault and you should just let people screw you over. You need to grow up and fix your mentality, to put this into a metaphor; you are covered in ticks, but you refuse to have them removed because then you'll just be covered in mosquitos. Deal with the ticks and then buy some mosquito repellent, stop letting the bloodsuckers feast on you.
Dude, you are still giving money to your ex and your sister? The ex who regurlarly hit you and the sister who made your life as a kid hell? Why?And your fiance is not much better. You really don't know what an healthy relationship is, all you saw in your life is abuse.
Clearly everything you did didn't end in failure, you have a well paying job, all you have to do is get rid of the bloodsuckers, and focus on taking care of yourself. Fix that inferiority complex or whatever you have that makes you think all of this is okay. You are in no position to make anyone happy if you're unhappy, this marriage is moving extremely fast and clearly you need more time. You're on a train about to run off the side of the cliff but you're afraid to pull the brakes because you think something worse might happen to you.
@devilman666 the problem with him is that he's so broken he literally smells of prey, and will always draw predatory people.He's an injured sheep in woods full of wolves.
@devilman666 I don't think it's okay, but I really see it difficult to live in another way. I always thought and still think that life as a man means working, making sacrifices to make the people around me live better, but I have difficulties in setting the boundaries and make them respect my choices. I don't want to be imposing or forceful, but I also don't want to be a pushover.
You really need to start standing up for yourself. You really need to find someone who will lift you up and make you happy.Your fiance, your ex and your sister will kill you. Not literally, but they are draining your life out. They are leaving you a shadow of the person you were.
Unforunately people are going to push you around, and the only way to not be a pushover, is to be imposing and forceful. You have to stand up for yourself, you don't have to push back, you just have to stand firm.Sure, feel free to work hard and make sacrifices to help people sometimes, but if people expect you to make sacrifice after sacrifice, then they are using you. Sacrifices means helping a friend move, paying for a friends lunch, maybe give some money to helping the homeless, but don't give and give and give to people who only take. Make sacrifices for people who really matter, people who really care about you, people who would do the same for you. If you really want to help people then change careers, go into an important field like medicine or politics, find a way to use your skills to make a real difference, but don't let parasites take advantage of you, otherwise they'll make you unable to help anyone, including yourself.
This is so true. My ex who was constantly "joking" and then eventually accusing me of cheating ended up being the one to cheat. In my experience even from observing my peers' relationships, this pattern is very common.
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Wow exactly i don't cheat but have been asked an accused repeatedly she just drove her self crazy to the point of believing her assumptions about it and went and cheated on me hell na
I frankly don't understand how, since I stopped frequenting all female friends and avoid any interaction with other women to make her happy, to the point I got labeled as a little "Mike Pence".
Oh for god sakes! You’re doomed. Your girl has got some sirius issues...
It was one of the points of our discussion
Where do you get that idea? She's more or less saying he can cheat to his heart's content (and so can she) as long as come nightfall they are together.
@PrimalInstinct I think she's joking since she always checks my phone and messages and is actually pretty jealous of me.
@Jean-Marie_Céline - that isn't joking you silly boy. She is a controlling manipulative bitch.
@PrimalInstinct at this point I recognize she's controlling and possessive, but I'd like for her to leave me some room to breath. She wasn't that clingy before.
@Jean-Marie_Céline - there is a saying " you've made your bed, now lie on it". You have a chance to break off this pathetic mockery of a relationship before you get married. If you do not do not be surprised if you spend your marriage, how little it may last, miserable.