What is more important: Physical or Mental Age?

I would like to ask everyone this, mostly the girls. Does physical age really bother you? Or does the mental age? what I mean by mental age is maturity level. I may be in my mid 20's but I sure do act like I'm in my 30's. To me I've never been fond of an age number. It's labeling and not necessarily true. I personally don't care for physical age, to me its all about the mental. What do you think?

Hypotheticals: Guy 24/Girl 33; Guy 49/Girl 25; Guy 18/Girl 23; etc.


Most Helpful Girl

  • i'm in my 30's and I have dated guys in their 20's but they always make me feel kind of old even thought I look like I'm in my late 20's. I don't think physical age is a good label for anyone. I have friends in their 20's and they are more mature that people in their 40's but society does judge on physical age. I started dating guys my age and I look younger than them and I love that...it's all fun and games until someone gets called a cougar. I guess it depends on how much you care about what other people think

    • How is it the guy makes you feel old? Is it because that in your mind it nags at you that he's so young? I've been in that boat, and I'm still trying to understand her and what went wrong. Since you were older, did it really bother you about what people thought when you were dating someone young?

    • i don't know. I guess it was my own insecurity. like this morning, I woke up for the first time next to the new guy that I'm dating, he's 43 and I didn't feel like it had to worry if I woke up with puffy eyes or make up on my face 'cause he doesn't care as much as a younger guy. as far as what other people thought about dating a younger guy, strangers didn't notice but we live in a small town and everyone knows my age so if I ran into people I know, they would see the age gap

    • i see, I just would like to understand if the age would truly bother the girl. I was 'with' a girl 9 years older than me. of course there was a physical age difference but our mental age lined up. I never knew if me being younger than her by that much really bothered her since she never told me. I kinda heard from some people it did but she never came forth about it and I never asked.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • Personally, mental age has always been the ranking factor for me. For me, the physical age is often overshadowed by maturity level, because if we connect on our maturity levels -- we're much more likely to have common ground (or perceptions) about life. I'm not saying that maturity allows people to agree on every small aspect similarly by any means (that would be extremely unrealistic), and it would be pretty boring anyway, huh? I suppose that it's a matter of being capable, and willing to be what each other needs within the relationship that maturity provides. (: I'm one of those firm 'age is merely a number' believers. I think that there are times when a *large* difference between ages raises the questions and eyebrows of others, but if the mental ages are compatible, it makes for a healthier relationship.

    • Wise for someone so young. I too believe 'age is merely a number' and does not truly define who a person is. I am always reluctant to say my age, since once that number is out you are labeled.

  • Both. Until the age of like, 25 I think. Then you can date someone older than you by 10 years... But I say never a year younger. Dating older is okay, as long as you and the other person are ready. But, mental age is a big deal, because nobody wants to feel like they're babysitting their significant other.

    • When you mean by the age of 25 which gender are you referring too? I'm sure if it the guy is 25 it would definitely depend on the woman's mental state to date someone ~10 years younger than them.

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    • why is that if you don't mind my asking?

    • For starters, let me apologize for taking so long to reply. I was busy with college.

      Mostly, it's because even if they're mature, they aren't gonna have any idea of what you've been through. It's mostly life experience that keeps older women from dating younger men.

  • I would say mental age. Most people don't have the same mental age as physical age, and to have a happy relationship it might be better to be with some one that is the same mental age as you vs physical age. This opinion is from a female.


What Guys Said 1

  • Definitely mental age. There's a reason why it's against the law to have sex with someone that is an adult but has the mental capacity of an 8 year old. Just because a person is say 35 years old physically, does not mean that they are that old mentally. And there could be someone that is 18 but has the mental age of say 30. The only thing keeping them back may just be their financial situation since they haven't had the opportunity to build themselves a career because of their physical age.