Do You Think Dating Apps Are Unfair Towards Men?

[MrSpine]

Yes, dating apps are unfair towards men

No, they are completely fair for both genders

[EmbraceThePain]

It’s an odd place because most don’t really know what’s taking place. Most men are looking for many women to sleep with (quantity over quality) so they try to get with as much women on there as reasonably possible. Now, women are the reverse, trying not to be with too many men, picking quality over quantity. The women are also, as a whole, looking for relationships, whereas the men, as a whole, are probably not. So, this creates tons of men swiping right on every woman and tons of women, swiping left on almost everyone.

Most men aren’t leaders
Most men aren’t courageous
Most men do not have set principles, purpose, initiative, discipline, etc.
Most men aren’t alphas
Most men aren’t relentless.
Most men aren’t men...

You can see why many are having negative experiences online “dating.”

Whereas women only need to look pretty and have a nice body for the men online to be into her since these men are looking for something closer to casual and non committal in nature

[Reaperbot666]

https://www.youtube.com/embed/DZTIbHIsIYwhttps://www.youtube.com/embed/Y4E8qEDi_xghttps://www.youtube.com/embed/H6ONHDmDD8shttps://www.youtube.com/embed/4cblIKG4XhQhttps://www.youtube.com/embed/XuI6GTY9eVchttps://www.youtube.com/embed/y9KFAedUR50https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ns9vqnuWRwYhttps://www.youtube.com/embed/4YD4_NFNswY

many modern girls these days seem to want a guy with. above average height, above average muscle tone, above average income, above average intelligence, above average penis size.

which already limit choices to roughly 5-15% of guys world wide. once you factor in all of those. so if she only wants one of those type of guys. she should be ready to share him with other girls. also a good chance those guys will never settle down. because those guys often have dozen of girls throwing themselves at them.

[JosyJosy]

I think they are because when I think dating sites, I think "SEX-CREEPS-DICK PICS-SEX-HI HOW R YOU and... SEX"
I've read it many times on this site that some don't want to give datingsites/apps a chance because of the creep factor.
This isn't even a dating site and there are lots.

I can imagine some innocent unknowing girl log in, get overwhelmed and just leave with that as a memory about datingapps/sites.

I bet there are many good guys out there, but they best hope the girl survives long enough to bump into one of the good ones

[btbc92]

Personally I say no. Dating apps just like with anything else in life is what you choose to make of it. So if they want to go there with the expectations of fighting somebody physically attractive, and all these unrealistic expectations, didn't I just say that it's fair game, and they asked what they wish for. That goes for women too.

[Twinrova]

Lmao, girls on Tinder get an inflated ego because 8+/10 guys will match with 5's just to get laid. When girls get matched with anyone they swipe on they can be picky, and they choose to only match with people out of their league. At that point it is bad for both sexes, because girls are only talking to the fuck boys, and guys struggle to connect with someone in their ball park. That's facts, and I ain't even ugly. But when an above average amount of matches for a guy is like 4-5 a day, and an ugly girl can match anyone she swipes on, you can't tell me Tinder is equally as hard for each.

[Twinrova]

True story by the way. I was getting about 4 matches a day, and I'm telling you, among the dozen or so people I knew with Tinder, that was on the high end.

[btbc92]

But you people like thay filthx so why complain? Relationships are not about sex, physical looks, etc. You people made it that way. You people like that stuff. You people don't believe in God, believe in godly things, live life in righteousness anymore, have a desire to do things right. You live in the flesh. Your just a product on the market. So there you go. If you didn't want that, why be o It? You asked for it.

[btbc92]

Maybe if you people never forsaken the social skills that you learn when you were toddlers up until your teenagehood, and did things God's way, you wouldn't be in this fix. It's about gratification. And you people enjoy that. Because everything else is too prudish, childish, and religious for you. If you live that lifestyle yourself then who are you to judge? You don't like how things are in your life how about changing it? It starts by changing what's in you. Change what's not correct about you and maybe you will attract the kind of person you want and need in your life. Appreciate the little things in life. And you'll be much happier.

[Twinrova]

I didn't finish reading what you wrote, and I do believe in God.

[btbc92]

So if you believe in God why are you on Tinder which is influenced by our enemy? That means you have no business being on there in the first place.

[Twinrova]

I'm not going to debate with you. You can find good people on Tinder. My girlfriend is very Godly. If you're going to say "but there are also bad people on there," then let me remind you there are bad people everywhere, including this website you use...

[btbc92]

I honestly don't think you get it. This is not about a debate. This is about the reality and the opinion and answer you want to debate with. The simple fact is it's not unfair to anybody. It's what you choose to make of it. So if you choose to find a girlfriend on Tinder and you got one on Tinder that is your business. You chose to use Tinder and do what you made of it. Hence why you got who you got. And if you're okay with that, again that's you. You pretty much proved the point of exactly what I said. So anything that you want to say afterwards it's completely irrelevant. You don't have to tell me there are bad people everywhere I am near 30 years old. I am not a child. I am just simply telling you if you want to do whatever it is that you want then you go do that. But don't have any hypocrisy and double standards here. The point of the matter is this is not for a pity party. If you use it and you get nothing out of it that's on you. If using and you get something out of it, and that's what you want congratulations. But if it's not what you wanted, then you should have thought about it. That goes for anybody. Anybody in their right mind would not be using those type of things. Unless of course they have no other option. Period.

[EmbraceThePain]

@Twinrova

The men on there just want to have sex with all of their swipes... It’s purely shallow. Whereas most women do not want that on there. I’m sure you’ve seen the “Don’t swipe if you just want to hook up” comment on many women’s profiles. Since men just want to have sex, they orient towards “quantity over quality” always have...

Women want commitment, long term, etc.
so, they’ll be more selective, because it’s riskier for them.

Also, to be 100% honest, a woman will get with someone who is around the same level of attractiveness as her. It’s non existent for a man who is a model to be with a woman who is less than average, unless he just wants to use her for one night, which is hardly beneficial for the woman and greatly for the man. The woman looses a lot more falling for this “trap.”

[imthatsteve]

@btbc92 i agree with your sentiment but i think it is unfair. I dont think you can fix it, i dont think its possible to be fair but that doesn't make it fair.

Im not complaining or anything but to me fair vs unfair is basically asking if men and women are equal when it comes to dating apps and its pretty obvious to me that we are not equal and can't be equal just due to the differences of the sexes.

As an average man on any dating app you will be lucky if you get a single girl to message you first or reply to a message you send on any given night. While average girls will end up with 20 guys to talk to at any given moment in time.

That to me is the definition of unfair, just because you can't change it or fix it, in other words; it is what it is. That doesn't make it fair. But i agree with you that you get what you get and you know what it is before going in.

[btbc92]

What everyone has to understand is that life overall isn't fair, and this is but a system. Dating apps is no more than a tool no different than what we use on this site. Everything about you saying is pretty much exactly why everything is unfair. You treat yourself as a product on the market instead of being a human being. Once you realize that you are a human being that is worthy to be loved then you won't worry about that kind of system that you trying to navigate in just to get a partner. I am over all with you would kiss it average, and I never once had men flocking over me over something like that in real life. What I realize has less to do with looks and more to do with who you are in the spirit. If you have a spirit that is not agreeable to people they're not going to like you no matter how attractive or ugly you look according to the world's standards. Other than not going to gravitate towards you for a certain reason. When I learned what it is and I stop getting into it that's when things started changing around. When you fully realize that you do have the power to make your own choices as opposed to other people trying to make some things your fate then you will begin to change not only physically but spiritually too. The problem why a lot of men are struggling is because a lot don't know their worth. They're basing their validation all on a woman. No different than a lot of women are basing their validation all on a man. When I stop basing my validation in society, that's when everything turned around.

[btbc92]

It's not about getting a single girl to message you. It's simply what are you doing in that kind of environment in the first place. There are just some people who don't belong on dating apps and these are the ones that will get chewed out the most. Many don't even belong in the dating system. When I took myself out from the prospects of it because I was never in it in the first place, that's when everything changed. So if you want to be successful get out of the dating system.

When you get out of the confinements of this world system, then you'll be able to navigate freely as you should.

[imthatsteve]

I chose yes because i had to choose but its a loaded question. Life is unfair to men and women. You cannot have true equality unless things are the same. Men and women are not the same so you cannot make a fair system. All you can do is work with what you have and do your best. That said i think most men should stay away from dating apps unless they have above average sex apeal or it will negatively effect your self esteem. Likewise any ladies looking for a decent guy or looking for a relationship of any kind should stay away from hookup apps and most dating apps in general. Apps are for instant gratification, if your not looking for a one night stand then dont go to a one night stand machine. If you want a burger you dont go to tacco bell.

[Freddy78361]

Fairness is a tricky thing.
Every man has the same (for the most part) opportunity to get in shape, dress nice, and put his best pictures on his profile.
If a woman doesn't choose/match with you then you didn't do enough to. ake her want you.

Same applies for women EXCEPT men are not as discerning in their swipes as women are.
What does that mean?
If a woman is a six she will only swipe right on men who are 7-10.
A man, on the other hand, will swipe from 5-10.

So if a woman and man are both sixes they will not match because she doesn't accept him as a quality partner.

[Twinrova]

They are. Tinder and Bumble are confirmed rigged. One time I had a profile on each with 3 plain selfies of myself. I was doing well, getting a good amount of matches per day. Then I changed my profile picture to a candid photo of me on the beack, staring into the distance, and I IMMEDIATELY noticed my matches increasing on both apps. I got like 3x the normal amount of matches the day I switched my profile pic up. The day after that, I noticed a slight dip in the matches from the day before, but I was still getting wayyyy more than I used to. Then the day after that, it was back down to normal. They rig the system against you so that you will buy their memberships to increase your matches.

Also, none of this even touches the fact that most girls who match with you won't give you the time of day, given that they are probably talking to like 20 other guys, lmao. I have had success on the apps, but man oh man is it ever wayyyy easier for women.

[gaygod_19]

Sounds like your case all comes down to whether if they're that attracted to you or not. U can't blame it on the app.

[Twinrova]

@gaygod_19 How is that what you took away? Lol. The app obviously tempers how many matches you get. I didn't make that story up.

[Bandit74]

I guess people take issue with the use of the word fair since their is often a moral context attributed to it. Regardless of whether its fair/unfair I 100% think the average woman has a much easier time attracting matches and can afford to be a lot more picky than the average guy can. This is true not only on dating site but also in real life. Its just more obvious on dating sites.

To be honest the part that annoys me is that women get so much more sympathy for their insecurities than men do and men are accused of having subjecting women to unrealistic stardards yet women seem to be far more selective.
Total bullshit.

[Anonymous]

It's not that they're unfair, it's just that men are more likely to join them than women, making an unequal distribution.

For example, on OkCupid I had my normal account. I could scroll through for a long time without ever reaching the bottom of the available men in my area! But, out of curiousity, I made a fake guy account to check out the competition. It took only 30 seconds to reach the bottom of available women.

It was about 8 pages of dudes and 1.5 pages of women (in my area). BUT new people are always coming and going. I met my boyfriend on this site, and he was on there for years before we met! Don't give up hope lads, it can take one person to change everything

[genericname85]

no, dating apps are not unfair towards men. female nature is unfair towards men. they don't physically feel attracted to most men except the most pretty specimen, while mens preferences are way more moderate.

women actually don't give that much of a fuck about looks but tinder is mostly about looks, so it doesn't exactly help men play their strength in their favor.

so it's your choice not to use it. it's not unfair if you still use it. just don't expect women to throw their pussy at you on there.

[Anonymous]

Apps aren’t unfair.

the hookup market is brutal to average and below men.

the dating market is more even in total

the dating market is skewed towards younger women and slightly away from older women.

Many locations have male female ratios quite different from 50/50. Some cities really do have more women and men, and as they pair off the imbalance in the single population can be quite large.

apps in particular tend to be skewed to a fair bit of hooking up plus younger demographics. Both are areas that are tough for average guys.

[OlderThanILook]

Dating apps like Tinder are marketed towards desperate men. They are literally made to make men spend money. They do not help men find relationships as advertised. There are actual systems put in place to make it harder for men to match women. I would not advise men to use matchmaking apps.

[Anonymous]

The main issue is that society expects men to make the first move by approaching the girls therefore the pretty girls just sit back and receive hundreds of messages which she can ignore while the guys are all competing against each other and the girls don't reply unless they are perfect alpha males.

[Guanfei]

The apps? No, the apps are just a tool.
The only issue is how it's used. And in that case, women are much more picky than men. They're all aiming at 10/10 guys and disregard the rest. The now well known "80% of women goes for the 20% top men"
Studies show that on average, women have 50% chance to get a match, when men have... 2% chance.

And that is not the app. That's the people using it. As an average guy, I would never have a chance on it.

[Unit1]

Then become a Rick and make something out of yourself.
Or why would you. Love is a chemical reaction in the brain, that compels animals to breed anyway - which is very likely nature's sole purpose of having it in the first place in us animals.
Or are you the Morty one :> ?

[R3DthatDude]

Dating apps are unfair to dating in my opinion lol. It’s very simple and stupid but hey it works for some. You try to condense all of who you are in a short freakin sentence😆 then you try to choose a pic that doesn’t say hey I’m a cat fish, but I’m also not ugly. But wait you can’t actually see people until you’re prepared to pay monthly so we can weed out the not serious people. And after jumping through all those Hula hoops then the real difficult part begins... yea it’s not for me

[Unit1]

It's less about the dating app than it is about the participants in the dating app. We all know that women on average reject 80% of the men and men reject no more than 50% of the women. Simple supply and demand.

Now the unfair dating apps towards men require male users to issue a payment while the women get to use it for free. These are called "seekingarrangements" or colloquially speaking gold diggers seek sugar daddies or beautiful women seek rich men.

[G3tAClue]

Dating apps aren’t unfair towards men, society is unfair towards men who are expected to make the first move. As far as dating apps go, both genders can swipe right or left. But it seems like there are far more men swiping right than women.

[Potatocream]

I mean Tinder is obv programmed to get as many people to buy their premium version aka girls are the bait and get everything they need to get to stay there and men have ti buy the premium to get w the hotties 😂 its very basic but even with all that I wouldn't say its not doing its job I've had plenty of women on there asking to fuck me so yea while it is tryna get their rent in its still doimg decent 😂

[Cherokeehp]

Dating apps are for sad people anyways. But no, I don’t think it’s unfair to men. I think it just reflects the way people date in real life. Lots of women attract lots of men, but few men attract lots of women.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Yes, they make Males pay to get messages from Females who
respond to them all it is with dating apps is a money-making scheme
they are out to get money off Males and have no other reason to do so

[thegirlfromthething]

I think men have a harder time on them than women because that’s usually how dating is on and offline, but I don’t know of any ways dating apps purposely make it harder for men than women to use them.

[OlderThanILook]

Most matchmaking apps use an elo system. Profiles with low elo scores dont even get shown to other people. That naturally puts men at a disadvantage since the entire premise of dating is that the guy tries to impress the girl. Girls don't really have to try to get matches, but 10 matches is a lot of a guy. Like a whole lot. Women typically swipe on the same few accounts, which gives the illusion that men have just as many matches as women. But thats a very small amount of men. The rest of us either swipe for nothing or straight up quit.

[Anonymous]

Most girls aren't even interested in finding a man on dating apps. It's just entertainment and a "popularity gauge".
Guys don't make yourself to clowns and if she doesn't show any effort in communication with you, forget her.

[Flower7]

I can't think of any ways that they are unfair towards men. They seem to have the same features available for both genders to use.

[andreasderjuengere]

'Mine' wasn't :)
I talked to numerous women who use dating apps, and my general impression is that these apps are full of man-trash. No wonder that they get scared of us :D