Let's say that although this is a general question, she was the one restraining me because I wanted to go out and made a stupid remark that she took seriously and thought I was going to hurt myself
I would still feel the same way about all points. Just replace she with he mentally lol. But yeah I think depending what you said, its a bit less abusive on her part since you actually did say something that lead her to believe that. I think intention is important.Example: if you said "well I'll just go kill myself then" but you were being sarcastic I'd think what she did is less abusive because her intent was probably because she wanted to keep you safe at any cost. But if you said "I won't be coming back" I'd think her restraining you would be more abusive on her part because you really can't just jump to conclusions about something like that even though it could have an ominous meaning behind it.And no matter how it went down, I think if you said "let go" she and she didn't thats what makes it cross the line for me.
I don't say to trust no one, but since I have been hurt by people I trusted and have been seeing and discovering how my fiancée has treated other people, I've been brewing some doubts for a while now. Having doubts is human behavior.
Yes, you've been through a lot, Jean. You are at least asking the question, 'how do you trust?' You explore many things. You are in relationships and make many attempts to go forward.My comment was directed at the absoluteness of many of the others here.
Having doubts is human but you are on the edge of fullblown paranoia.
I understand, that's the reason I'm asking the questions, so other people can share their experiences
Hey, Amanda. I appreciate the compliment!
Yea but there's only so many times a person can trust before they start to think it's pointless and self destructive.
The second part of your question is very tricky... If you honestly believe they are going to hurt themselves then i think it's worth upsetting them to potentially save there life. But here's the catch... Regardless of your intentions or feelings... You are standing in the way of what they want and are physically forcing your will on them... So despite your motives... To them it is extreamly abusive and out of line. Just keep that in mind. Saving there life is worth there hate in my opinion... But despite Wich end your on in this try to think of how the other person feels. It may be hard during... But after you've calmed down and they decide to untie you (xD) just remember there just trying to help. Even if you don't agree with how
Great answer, Jamie. 🥇
Thanks for the MHO.
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I don't know what to say
Very well said.
What's the dislike?Sometimes I think people dislike your opinion just because.
Makes me think they hate it when I expose their ultimate ulterior plan. You know like the truth hurts and is infamous. I mean you or I wouldn't like it if somebody takes away your opportunity for something sweet. It's a natural reaction.Or maybe I described one, who trusted the wrong someone and felt it to the heart and put the downvote out of a triggered impulse.
Probably.I thought it was from the pink Anon who suggested therapy, but she got a pink dislike too...
There will be losers downvoting everything. They don't need a reason to.
Oh come on you two. "You don't. Unless you are suicidal or get married as a blue to an eventual slow and drainful death."That statement is probably why the downvote. It wasn't me, but I did consider it, I'm goona be honest. That's horrifically pessimistic. If you will never trust anyone then don't be with anyone. But not trusting people is not a necessity to life. There's still some decent people out there.
@AmandaYVR you are right, but it's also somewhat true that in this day and age you can get doubts about anyone, no matter if they are men or women.I don't dare express my doubts with my fiancée or other people even after seeing some of their behaviors, because it would hurt them or elicit a negative reaction, but some times one can really feel alone even with someone next to them.
It seems to me you are just going down a spiral of fear and paranoia.
@AmandaYVR simply put. I'm not an idiot to dig my own grave. Dependency is toxic. Better die fighting than living a slave or a fool. People change when they don't need to and people don't change when they need to.Trust is my currency.
I agree with all that.
Again no if you are and they are physically able to leave it is considered mental play. Someone can mentally abuse u only if you give them the power. What does it say about you if u let them? That u are not strong as a person and you will never be content with any person u are with. You have to grow as a person to be able to have a healthy relationship. What does it say about them? If you are doing the drama then they are a puppet and u soon tire of the game and u will move on to someone else or u will become physical and it will not end good. If they are the one doing the drama and u take the crap one fine day u will snap and all this drama will bore you and u will no longer find them so stimulating. Drama threats crying etc is momentary it will fizz out soon.
You expect to be hurt and abused?
Not abused but hurt. People hurt you at some point - whether on purpose or not. You can't avoid it. No one is perfect.
You have a point, I too do my best to not expect too much out of other people.
Yeah. The higher your expectations are the more does the fall hurt if people don't fit to them.
Eh not really.