I haven't dated anyone in over 10 years, and I am considering dating again. However, I have a dillemma... My dillemma is that I am in my mid 30's, and I am not interested in (more like I don't want to be bothered with) dating women that are single parents. In fairness, I do not have children myself. Am I asking for too much?
In my Area, I have yet to find a blatantly single woman that has no children close to my age. I am perplexed of this considering I am a bit apprehensive of the concept of dating younger women--No offense intedned to younger women, but the young tend to be a bit more needy and play games--I have no time nor patience for games.
Nevertheless, my inquiry is prevailent due to many occurrences of confrontation (and an "intervention")from my family... My mother and stepfatehr both think that I am being selfish and not being a man of responsibility by not wanting to date or marry a woman with existing children. They were both parents when they were married 20 years ago, nonetheless. My (biological) father think that I am asking for too much and says that I should settle for the first woman that accepts me... I told him, that I would never, because there is a such thing as unrequited affections--In this case, she will be a victuim of such by a high probability.
I tried dating sites only to be encountered by liars and scammers... I detest liars, cheaters, and theives. I really don't go to bars because I do not drink, nor do I have an inclination to do so, for both religious and practical reasons. so meeting up at a dive bar is out of the question... Even now, If I were to find someonme interesting enough, I think I miss out because I am not aggressive in persuit of a woman--I am not shy, but due to past circumstances, I am cautious about getting too close to people sometimes... I just like to take things one step at a time.
I hear of women whining about "why do this man cheat" or "Where are all of the'good guys'", or whatever the case may be... But laugh when they bypass us for the jerks, because we prefer to take things slowly... I have never cheated nor will I ever (I'd rather kill myself, yet I am not suicidal) cheat.
Nevertheless, Am I asking for too much by wanting to only date women without children (Period, and I don't mean their children are adults or their chuildren are not in their custody...)?
Am I being selfish?
Or am I within my rights?
Most Helpful Girl
I don’t think you’re being selfish. There are many people- men and women- who wouldn’t date someone who already has a child. Maybe it’s their loss, who knows? But I think it’s understandable to want to be with someone who has no child, because when you get into a serious relationship with someone who is a parent you also take some kind of responsibility for the child… at least you will be in its life.
Still here a little story. My stepfather could never imagine being with a woman who has children. He was in his mid 30’s, single for about two years and then he met my mother. She had TWO children, was in the middle of a divorce… a big red flag. On top of this she wasn’t looking and didn’t want a new relationship at that time so it was really hard to get to her.. But he felt head over heel for her… and you know what? All this other stuff didn’t matter. This guy with really high ethics and standards married her a year after he met her, and they are still together.
I’m just saying… you never know what life brings. Don’t lower your standards… I think it’s right to look for someone you really want and not just to be with someone because you’re afraid to die alone, that’s just bull. But sometimes life shows us that your priorities can change pretty quick…
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