Much appreciated for MHO! Happy to hear I could assist in some way :)
Just because you feel uncomfortable when having your weaknesses exposed doesn't mean that it's the fault of the person you're talking to. That discomfort is going to happen naturally, because you're sharing something that makes you vulnerable. You probably would fell the same discomfort if you were talking to a psychologist about it.
I should have been more clear that the point of incompatibility could be anything - religion, lifestyle, city vs. suburban vs. rural living, finances, careers, family obligations, criminal records, etc. No matter what the red flag might be, you'll want to discover them very early so you can either work out a compromise or end things and move on. You never want a red flag to go undealt with, because it will blow up your relationship eventually.
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Guys may be hoping to get laid tonight, but many of them are not going to seriously consider a woman who goes to bed with them on a first or second date. The first few dates should be about getting to know each other and becoming comfortable. You should express enough physical affection for the guy to know that you are attracted but not so much that he thinks he's going to score tonight.Around the third date, it is okay to have some discussion about how you feel so far and to also discuss sex. I have had women tell me that they look forward to having sex in a relationship when they feel comfortable and we have agreed to date exclusively. And I have suggested that before we get to that point, that we should both get tested for STD's so that we each know that we can feel safe with our partner. Then, when the moment finally arrives, we can be more spontaneous without stopping to have a potentially awkward conversation.I have had the "exclusive" talk with a lady as early as the third date and as late as two months after we started dating. I have had relationships that became sexual as soon as we had the exclusive conversation and I had one for which I waited for 6 months before she felt comfortable enough to get physical.Is that what you are looking for?
Yes. That helpful. Thank you.
I think it's okay to delay the first meeting, though. Because more time gives you a chance to find out about any red flags.
@Jamie05rhs then you finally meet and there's no chemistry and you've wasted hours of time.
@slatyb What if there isn't? So what? Just start over and go fishing again. At least you didn't get murdered.
@Jamie05rhs right! I'm not trying to be murdered, raped or kidnapped and it has happened to women before me.
@Jamie05rhs yeah, there have been a lot of people killed after meeting in a coffee shop.
Such a useless comment, lol. I'm sorry. But I genuinely think it's important not to worry about it too much. Just make sure you're moving at the same pace as your partner.