Why aren’t you smart enough to think about what’s gonna happen when she is 40 and he is 60? Would she still be happy married to a senior citizen? What ir she is 50 and he is 70? Statistics have shown that large age gap marriages are twice as likely to divorce as smaller age gap relationships
Most marriages end in divorce anyway because marriage is an outdated practice. Since we're quoting statistics did you know most men die earlier than women? So either she'll probably still be young when he croaks (or divorces) and can reenter the dating scene as a widow (which isn't a bad thing) or they both grow old and die happy, which is a possibility despite your 10iq predictions.
Yea where is a 45-55 yr old woman gonna get remarried?
Married? Who cares? Do women need the tax breaks and cosigners that bad? Stop caring if she gets married and start caring if she's happy.
Yea where is a 45-55 yr old woman gonna get remarried at that age?
Did you just post the same reply?
Nobody gets married only to need to get remarried 15 years later. Either you don’t marry at all or you pursue a life time marriage. Why do people want marriage? Some people still have familial values
Yea sorry can't empathize with those people. The world is overpopulated and the wealth gap is getting so big, who would want to bring a doomed child into this world? The familial values of 20 and 40 years ago are so drastically different from those of today which is why most rational people have forsaken them, which is why age is just a number and happiness matters more than marriage.
Age is not just a number when you feel more like a nanny than a wife. Life stage incompatibility comes with a whole new array of issues
If you want to be a mother but not feel like a nanny, you definitely shouldn't be a mother
Haha I Married my husband to feel like a wife , not some free servant nanny
But do you have kids?
You can be a wife without being a mother but you cannot be a mother without being a nanny.
I'm looking for a partner to raise my kids with, not to become a nanny to a 8 yr old kid and a 50 yr old kid.
I'm looking for a partner to raise my kids with, not to become a nanny to a 8 yr old kid and a 60 yr old kid.
Wait is that a hypothetical or are you a single mom preaching about familial values?
Im really trying to find your angle and where you're coming from, what these issues are you speak of that are more important than the woman in question's preference.
I am about familial values which is why I chose to have a family regardless if I find a husband or not. But most men are terribly quality nowadays. It’s better to stay single than to have a terrible husband that your kids hate
Ah so you're a baby fever ridden ball of hormones without any real concern about anyones happiness than your own. You want to talk about what happens down the line, have you read any of the studies about what happens when children grow up without fathers? Shitty fathers aren't a better alternative but why didn't you think about how the absence of a father would affect your children? Sorry to break this to you, but men with familial values don't want to raise children that aren't their own, we want to proliferate our own bloodlines, thats our genetic prerogative, its natural selection and its not something you can get around no matter how high your horse is.
Ummm.,, I grew up with a shitty father. I kid you not. I am better off with no dad than a shitty dad
Your egocentricity knows no bounds...
Your ego has no bounds. You think you’re entitled for any woman to take you in?
Never said anything about women taking me in. You probably didn't read my entire post because you have the attention span of a 4 year old. I said a shitty father isn't an alternative to no father, but you saying that you had a family without a father because of your values means you had no empathy oe foresight to the life of your children without a father, you just did what made you happy.
What I’m saying is: Having no dad is better than having a terrible shitty dad. I know from first hand experience ok? So don’t go throwing tantrums on here
you're saying what I said already but you're acting like I said something else and saying I throw tantrums? Lady your kids are gonna be so pussified and inept at actually dealing with real life because you're going to raise them as a karen. Good luck with that.
You’re throwing a tantrum cuz I don’t need a husband to have kids. Don’t worry about my kids. A man like you will only fuck up my judsb
Fuck up my kids
Butt hurt misogynist
Im the mysoginist but you're the one trying to dictate who should love who by their age and family values. Ok boomer.
You can have familial values without needing to marry rotten men.
Right cuz all men are rotten if they dont want to take your single mom used goods ass in and be happy about it.
Like I said I want to be single mom by choice cus most Guys are unwedable. They are too rotten. Even my father was rotten
Thats some pretty incel shit right there
i think you're an incel. why do you think i don't wanna marry someone like u?
50% of your replies are boiled down "no u". you're gonna live and die as a lonely karen whos too good for anyone. I pity you, and I can imagine most people you know do too; thats probably how youve made it this far in life. But yea keep it up trying to convince people you know what you're talking about since its worked out so well for you so far. *drops mic*
Women never die lonely karens. Because we can give birth to kids. We can have a family if we want. Men can't. So it means that you're much more likely than me to die a lonely karen haha
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age will catch up to them when she is 40 and he is 60. thast when the problems will arise.
See I don't think there will be since she is old enough to make her on decisions and live by them. If you are concerned then explain your concerns to her, but in the end it is her choice.
so you're basically saying if she's walking down a dark road where trouble lays, you wouldn't warn her?
You are expecting trouble when you really do not know there will be any. Unless you have a crystal ball that tells the future. what if it turns out to be the best decision she has every made? Would you stop her from being happy? You can warn her but still it is her decision to make.
Statistics show that 20 yr age gaps are 2x as likely to divorce as 1 yr age gaps. and at your age, YOU KNOW why this is the case. If this were your daughter, you wouldn't warn her? would you be happy seeing her spend the remaining 30 years of her life dying alone?
Warn her yes, but the choice is still hers to make. At 24 I do not control her. Am I to lock her in her room?
Well if your 20 yr old son wanted to join a dangerous gang cus he thinks it’s cool, you would allow him? Cuz you can’t control him? How about your daughter Marrying a man who has a history of abandoning his children? You wouldn’t say anything cus you can’t control her?
It’s not that you can’t control her. It’s just that you’re offended that age does matter. It happens to a lot of old guys who think 60 is the new 30
Not offended in any way. Sorry...
you ARE offended. Its not the first time i've seen something like this come from an old guy.
I am who I am and I am okay with me being me. You mistake me for someone else. I am old yes, but I am also happily single. I go out with young and old and they don't have a problem with my age. Not everyone thinks age matters. I see that you do and that is okay too. everyone is entitled to there own opinion, I respect that. However you might be surprised at the number of people that do not see age as a factor in relationships.
You just implied that you do agree there will be problems down the road due to hte age differnece. Statistcs show this too. A 20 yr age gap marriage is 2x as likely to divorce as a 1 yr age gap. Unless divorce is delicious to you, then go ahead. You wouldn't complain if it were you marrying a 30 yr old. But you would complain about yourself having to be stuck married to a 85 yr old at your age.
You know, this is not about me in any way. Your friend, daughter or whom ever she is. It is her choice to make not yours. You can talk to her about your concerns but it is her choice, not yours. You can either support her in her choice or push her away by not supporting her. I do not see age as a factor at all. I date girls 18 to 35. That is my dating range and I have no problems getting dates or being in relationships.
By that logic, you're basically saying you wouldn't give a shit about your 18 yr old son joining a dangerous gang where they kill people. he's an adult and he can make his own decisions.
How did we go from relationships to gangs? But you are right I can tell him what I think but I can not make up his mind. He has to do that. By your logic though you are saying that you can tell her not to have that relationship and expect her to obey you but what if she told you to have one with an older man and expected you to obey her?
Because marriages with huge age gap tend to significantly decline in satisfaction within the first 5-10 years. and use some common sense at 46, I’m still riding motorbikes. My 66 yr old husband in a nursing home. Do you really think I’ll stay tied down to a 66 yr old or start dating again at 46? Studies have proven that marriages with the larger the age gap, the shorter the marriage.
Marriages with large age gap tend to be very rough and a lot of sacrifices have to be made by the younger spouse in order for it to work and usually it is NOT worth it at the end (for the younger spouse) If you’re interested in learning more , I can tell you about it
Sorry to spoil your logic. I am 63 and still working 40+ hours a week. I am in the process of starting my own business, I have no need for a nursing home. Oh and by the way, I ride too. I also date girls 18 and I have no problem with it. They certainly don't mind.
I will tell you why marriages with large age gaps are a recipe for divorce and disaster. 1. Both partners may get along when they are young. If I were 25 and he were 38, we would get along. But we won't necessarily get along by the time I am 38 and he is 51. Because I would still be very active, riding motorcycles, wanting to visit 3 new countries, have an amazing sex drive. Meanwhile my old husband is more interested in going to bed early, erectile dysfunction, we would be arguing on where to go on a vacation because all he wants to go on is a quiet cruise. Instead of going on a hike or visit new places, he may just want to watch tv most of the time. By the time he is in the nursing home, I will still be riding motorcycles. Do you think i will want to live with you in a nursing home or ride motorcycle with my new boyfriend? Do you think I would be happier going on vacation with my new boyfriend or stay stuck with you changing your diapers at the nursing home? 2. At some point, the younger spouse will feel more like a nanny instead of a wife. By 45, if my husband is 60+. I wouldn't be able to go on a walk with him without telling him to watch his step or be careful or have to constantly slow down for him. I will be opening jars, lifting boxes for you. Meanwhile, other 50 yr old women are happily going on vacation with their husbands while you are at the nursing home changing diapers and feeding your 70 yr old husband. 3. When you have kids with a 45 yr old husband, Guess what? The younger spouse will bear the burden of chasing the kids, picking up toys. Because the husband is too old to catch up chasing the kids.
4. Your elderly husband may be retired, and your children are still not finished with college. So what does this mean? You will be paying for your 2 kids college tuitions all by yourself!!! By the time most people hit 60, they can't wait to start retirement. And even if you want to continue your job, your cognitive function will be significantly decreasing and there is no guarantee your employer will keep you 5. The younger spouse is going to spend the remaining 25-30 years dying alone. When he or she gets sick, there will be nobody to look after her. of course you won't care about this because you are not the younger spouse. 6. Having an old parent really destroys a kid's childhood experience. My parents were both 37 years old when the birthed me. They birthed my brother at 40. They were way too old to have a childish playful sense of humor that we needed to live happy childhoods. Parents who are too old would find it hard to relate to their kids. Sometimes kids just want to be mischievous and need the parent to play along or understand them. Older parents do not tend to understand this.
These are the reasons why statistics show that marriages with significantly large age gaps are much more likely to result in divorce than marriages with smaller age gaps. Studies have also found that large age gap marriages are also less resilient in financial distress. So unless divorce sounds delicious to you, go for a marriage with huge age gap.
I see we will just have to agree to disagree... I respect your opinion and the research you have done. Odds get beat all of the time. And to be honest when it comes to relationship you get out what you put into it. No matter the age gap the relationship will only last if both people are willing to put forth the effort each and every day. That is the only way the relationship can withstand the adversity.
It’s not something that works out for overwhelming majority of the population. Same as long distance relationships. These types of relationships have a very very high fail rate and very low satisfaction rate
I disagree, respectfully...
You just implied that you agreed before. I guess its just too painful for you to accept
usually if a guy goes for that much younger, its not love on his mind. its sex
Not necessarily. It’s not fair to generalize. I dated once a girl that was 21 years younger than me and it was definitely a serious relationship.
I'm saying this for the most part. Its usually unlikely someone would have much in common with someone 20 years younger.
You’re probably right, the majority may be looking for sex only.