I have friends for spades, Making friends isn't the issue.
And with the whole niceness thing, fuck niceness. Protect people when they need it. Be a stand-up guy. But niceness blurs into ass kisser, and you don't want to risk being confused for that.
Friends you picked? Like introduced yourself, invite them to hang out, like you made things happen and they didn't?
Like you actually invite them actively to places? Not them inviting you? You are active like that arranging social events people want to attend, but still have trouble with girls?
Most of my friends are ones I choose because if they came up to me and go lets be friends I would assume they after something
That's a trickier case than I'm used to dealing with. But you're still picky, ain't it? A bit filtering. Is that the case? Like it's difficult even if you choose your friends if I just throw you into a social event and give you the mission to make some? Cause I really think it doesn't take much if you can turn any stranger into a potential acquaintance, and eventually friend, to have that same power over lots of girls.
Well, lemme try another angle. Strength. And I don't mean muscles although they help. Strength. You command your space. If you can't be the leader in the group at least be the independent one. Strength. You talk to a girl and if anyone's retreating, no matter how much you fuck up, it should be her, not you. Strength. You know what I'm saying? You're kind so you probably wanna apologize if you messed something up. I'm saying be firm. Keep standing tall. I'm not saying to be an asshole. I'm saying to be firm. Like you have control over a situation. Because nice people usually apologize to the tsunami that's about to hit them.
And maybe even be a bit retarded if you're desperate. This whole idea that girls are attracted cerebrally and emotionally to some sensitive genius sweetheart -- it's utter nonsense. And it's obvious if you just look around at girls dating total retards pissing on stuff and saying dumb shit. You find your retarded caveman if nothing else. Because that retarded caveman attracts better than PhDs and gentleman philosophy. It's only a bonus if you have those things on top of retarded caveman. But girls mostly like retarded cavemen. So become retarded if you have to.
I like to apolgise even tho the other person might be oblibious to what i said.
Cheers, well, I think you could use a bit of an attitude. Like maybe not too much. I took it too far although I had no problems with dates. I never apologize for anything I don't believe to be wrong. Sometimes I take that idea too far. But it's better if you want girls to take that idea too far than too little. That applies even if you get to the relationship level, because no matter what girls say, it's a complete turn off for most to see a guy groveling at the knees begging for forgiveness with flowers in his hand. How is a guy like this supposed to protect her? He made her an authority. Never make your girls into an authority.
Because the moment you do, you are saying you can't protect them.
Thanks for the advice
... and girls don't respect that, subconsciously, no matter what comes out of their mouths. Girls don't respect a guy who can't even protect them. At least even if you got some saint who does, they won't after the years of feeling unprotected, of feeling like they are the ones who have the responsibility. You have to communicate everything in your body, your voice, right from the beginning, that you aren't that guy. You are responsible. You are going to protect. And you are going to lead.
Cheers! Well, I did the whole route some people call "player". I don't think I did that. I was maybe a "serial monogamist". And I like gentleman philosophy. I suspect you do as well.But the whole reason for walking on the side of oncoming traffic still boils down to, "Me strong! Me can protect u from cars!" You know, like that. You hold a door for a girl and it's like, "U princess! Me badass! I protect you from doors!" Never put your head down for these things. If you want to be a gentleman then it's more like a beast learning how to retract its fangs and claws, not someone who never thought to use them thinking they're special.
Give that vibe to girls -- that you got that beast inside you. Even if your very first conversations. Practice that. It might suck at first but you'll get better. And when you get better, you'll probably look backing like me wondering what all the fuss is about. It's not that hard to get dates in person, and I never did the whole online dating thing.
Because I dont want to be a jerk
What does being a jerk look like to you? Please answer my other question as well.
Actting like your tough girl like smacking a girls ass in public or a little tit grope etc.
It's good that you don't want to be someone who does that. How well are you able to do the things you want to do in life? Do you feel like you are living the life you want to live (not including your love life)?
My disabilty means I unable to work a lot of jobs and some girls find that because I dont want to work in an office and do paper work off putting because they think i am lazy. Its not that I am lazy its because I have low motatativion so if i get bored of something i give up.
What is your disability? Is your disability related to your low motivation?
I have Hypotonia and Dyslixia
Have you considered going to a gym to increase your strength?
There's the kicker The Gym has no effect on me as i am unable to build muscle mass.
Have you given it your all? Do you know this about yourself through an attempt you made?
It what my disabilty is. there's nothing i can do about it
We should never give up when we are thinking about the cards we've been dealt. If there is something you want to do, you must do it. The growth you will experience when accepting adversity is the key to happiness. Be true to yourself at all times and you will live a fulfilling life.
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We just friends noting more then that. Plus She isn't interested in dating at the moment
As much as we would like to fuck each other, we have respect for each other and as Lemia said I aren't looking to date atm
@FireRedPikachu true. And he needs something more serious than a quick fuck.
Lemia needs a serious relationship.