My friends tell me that if i really love him It should not be a problemAnd to be honest they are right I love him
Listen. Love doesn't hold a marriage. Sex in a way does. Marriage is a sexual union. A prenup ain't going to save you from heartbreak. Love has NOTHING to do with that. They just want you to conform to his selfishness because they too are selfish people. A man is SUPPOSE TO PROVIDE. NOT DIVIDE. You better make sure you make the right choice. I can love a man all I want. The moment he brings up a prenup. I'm out. He can marry somebody else but never would I marry that man if he can't trust me. It's a red flag. Prenups often don't hold up in court anyway.
It's conformity. It has nothing to do with love. Unless he is potentially rich, that may be a bit different because it's a business transaction regardless. That may make a bit of sense. But technically as 'serfs' what else will you have but each other? Don't feel pressured, because that's peer pressure. Make up your own mind. But I would not. Because most of these aren't even caring about assets. It's taking away his freedom and livelihood without much sacrifice in return while you sacrifice everything. In other words, he wins, you lose. That's not a marriage. A marriage is where both parties equally sacrifice, build with each other, set the foundation, grow, mature, learn, and be life partners. Not when it's convenient. When you are with the right person you never need that stuff. With the wrong person, and there is no trust, then why continue? Love is unconditional with some conditions. If love is unconditional why does he have conditions that have nothing to do with love but money and materials? If you had a fire or everything was wiped off the planet who is going to be more important? Your life? Or his PS4? Or a mansion? Or a car? Or his 6-figures in the bank? Is that more important than your wife or children? Unless you're building a trust fund. When you die, you're taking that stuff with you. Going into a marriage with that attitude is why there are so many divorces. Selfish people make marriages miserable be if there is a prenup or not. That's why people who often desire money and materially own so much often end up single and miserable. Because they prefer things over people and life-long commitments. Things are temporary. People aren't unless you treat them that way.
Make sure you're marrying for the right reasons. Once you consummate it you can NEVER go back. That's why divorce takes years and months to process and be successful. It's less about assets and just children. But to test you as well as for the state/gov to make sure you're making them $$$. To make you rethink leaving. Your friends have the wrong idea about love. Love is not selfish. Love gives without expecting much in return. Seriously look at this from a different angle and see where how it's now going to benefit YOU. See how selfish per se? Because he wants what benefits him at the end of the day. I don't care what sugar smacks he sells you. Under the surface, it's all about self. Not you. Because somebody like you who freely gives is often not seen as trustworthy and is naive when that isn't always true. It's because love comes easy for you. For them, it doesn't. Unless you just as selfish and materialistic it will not make you happy or benefit you in the long run.
Remember that it's about CONTROL, not LOVE.
This is crazy
Call it crazy. But that's how life is now. Welcome to 2020. Where people literally don't give a damn about you but how much control they can have. It's about power and control. The more power and control you have the more success you have in the system of systematic control. It's not like the 20s and ancient times where you have but each other.
You have to be CALLED for MARRIAGE. For not everybody is called yet everybody wants sex so much. This is why I never dated ever, been with a guy, would never marry, and such in this lifetime because this isn't living. It's damn if you do, damn if you don't. You better make sure this man loves himself. Because let me tell you something. Most men like that don't love themselves. And they treat women like enemies. They seek compensation and that's usually sexually. As long as you provide him that, he'll give you whatever you want just to make you happy enough to stay with them. But if he didn't have to put in much work, they rather not bother. It's not just character, it's attitude. I'm safer single and to provide myself than a selfish man who is never satisfied while you slave works yourself away to please somebody who's still selfish. You don't deserve that possible future. Or who knows. You probably already going through it but ignoring the red flags and signs. Notice how most people who ask for prenups have a really hard time giving without seeking much or having bitterness or begrudgingly about it. Why they have problems or some type of trust issue. Not all, nut most. Observe and be mindful that no matter what you are WORTHY to be LOVED. And not seen as an enemy. Read all the replies from the men here and tell me would you even marry them?
Seriously ask yourself are you SURE you are with the right person. Because of prenup or not. If you're with the wrong type of person, and you get married, your screwed. A man who is so 'in love' with his things can have them. But they won't have you. Some may even say good residence, yet you invested much more than just money or things. You've invested your heart and soul into that person. To most people sadly, they don't value that anymore. What was once the reality is now a fantasy you can only read in fiction novels and it's sad. I can't tell you what to do. But the last I want you to do is make mistakes my friends made. Marry the wrong people and still lose.
I really don't know enough about your RS to agree or disagree but I'll say one thing - being on the same page as your partner in regards to finances is REALLY important before getting married. Make sure you're on the same page, and there's mutual understanding first, otherwise it will cause a really big issue. Being married is very different to just being in a relationship when it comes to finances.
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