I'm ugly and there is nothing I can do about it. What can I do to bring joy in my life?

Question

I'm pretty ugly and I can't change that. I'm in the best shape I could ever be and I'm spending a couple of hours everyday washing my face and applying creams because my skin is cracking. If I don't do it everyday my aspect is getting worse so I'm losing a couple of hour everyday. My face is pretty asymmetrical , I'm only 5ft7 , bald and only 20 years old. But the thing is I look like I'm 35 , a lot of people tought I'm that old. I don't really know what to do , I don't have any friends since I finished highschool and girls want just to talk with me. I lost my appetite for life and I can't even remember last time I was happy or I felt something. I have a good job but I feel nothing can make me happy. All the girls I spoke I ended bad for me because they felt good speaking to me but they told me they're not atrracted physicaly so I ended social contact with girls.

Answer 1

Everyoneisplastic

Xper 5

Dude you'd have to be MAJOR ugly, like eyes all fucked up, crooked nose, alien face, huge ears, missing teeth, ugly to not find a girlfriend. My dad is kinda ugly (no jawline, weird eyes, chubby cheeks, low cheekbones, short height, widows peak) and he's gotten laid more times than he can count. I have an ugly friend and he had more girlfriends than me (I've literally heard girls say that I'm hot or cute behind my back, I've been sexually harassed and I had numerous girls have crushes on me in school) his brother is married (him and his brother look similar) and he has a long term girlfriend. You wanna look better? Mewing, squint a hair until it becomes your natural resting face, workout (losing body fat will bring out your jawline and cheekbones), and start taking care of your skin. All the while, try to work on having a little confidence, be honest, and follow the ten commandments. I shit you not, when you have a good personality and okay looks, girls will date you. I might have been born good-looking, into a Christian family with values, influenced by a real man on how to be a man, etc. But there's no reason you can't do these things for yourself now. Check out the user Looksmax on youtube and search for "looks maxing". It's an actual thing that can take you from a 4 to a 6. Here's an example of what it can do: (just delete the spaces, I'm not technically allowed to share links or images on comments because I'm not lvl3 yet) ht tp s://ww w. el iter eaders. c om /wp-content/uploads/2018/02/Ugly-Duckling-Syndrome-11 . jp g
htt ps: //ww w. el iteread ers. co m /wp-content/uploads/2018/02/Ugly-Duckling-Syndrome-26. jpg
h tt p s:// w ww. e lite rea ders. co m/w p-content/uploads/2018/02/Ugly-Duckling-Syndrome-3. jp g

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Answer 2

Larson7

Xper 5

If you read this and it doesn't break your heart then you do not have one. I'm sure the person who broke this post is not nearly as bad as I am from reading it. Because it's probably not even true. I mean I'm sure you're not ugly as you think you are nobody is that me. on it parent one God you kids make me sad you kids make me so sad the way that you are. I'm sorry man to do this on your side I'm so sorry

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Answer 3

Anonymous

You’ve gotta gain some confidence, dude. Just because you feel like you’re ugly, doesn’t mean everyone will feel the same. Besides, you have one face and one body, so rather than living in despair, just love yourself as you are. You beat yourself down before you even give a girl the chance to look at you as if you’re Quasimodo or something, and that’s a terrible way to live. Have confidence! If your job isn’t fulfilling, then figure out what sort of job would make you excited to go there everyday. If you’re having skin issues, then speak with a dermatologist or at least an esthetician, so they can suggest products that will help. But something has to give, because your outlook is just far too depressing.

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ImOkayTy

1 y
Well... you can't gain confidence , you gotta earn it. And you can't love yourself without a reason. I tried to find one and I can't , I guess I need someone to point it for me cause is pretty damn hard for me to see it for myself. I gave a lot of girls a chance , we spoke , we date but they ended up with another guy or saying my they love to spend time with me ( like... I like you but you're ugly ) . Even girls who had hard times with guys , with the smallest hint from another guy started to speak and see him when we were togheter. I'm in a point when I see it a normal thing and I don't blame them and honestly now I would do the same if I have a chance or at least I would think about it. We are humans.
Opinion Owner

1 y
Gain, earn, however you choose to word it, confidence comes from the inside, and takes work to accumulate, but you have to want that. These women aren’t telling you you’re ugly, but because you aren’t being chosen, you take it as another blow to your self esteem, and you can’t always look at scenarios that way. Like why would they even bother dating or talking to you romantically if they found you ugly, you know? I know optimism isn’t the easiest, but you should work on that. Even the most handsome men have trouble in the dating world, it just comes with the territory sometimes..

Answer 4

ImOkayTy

Well... you can't gain confidence , you gotta earn it. And you can't love yourself without a reason. I tried to find one and I can't , I guess I need someone to point it for me cause is pretty damn hard for me to see it for myself. I gave a lot of girls a chance , we spoke , we date but they ended up with another guy or saying my they love to spend time with me ( like... I like you but you're ugly ) . Even girls who had hard times with guys , with the smallest hint from another guy started to speak and see him when we were togheter. I'm in a point when I see it a normal thing and I don't blame them and honestly now I would do the same if I have a chance or at least I would think about it. We are humans.

Answer 5

Opinion Owner

Gain, earn, however you choose to word it, confidence comes from the inside, and takes work to accumulate, but you have to want that. These women aren’t telling you you’re ugly, but because you aren’t being chosen, you take it as another blow to your self esteem, and you can’t always look at scenarios that way. Like why would they even bother dating or talking to you romantically if they found you ugly, you know? I know optimism isn’t the easiest, but you should work on that. Even the most handsome men have trouble in the dating world, it just comes with the territory sometimes..

Answer 6

Iron_Man | 14.9K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Master

Going to the gym I take a lot of vitamins and drink a lot of water

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ImOkayTy

1 y
I'm living the healthiest way I could. Healthy food , vitamins , gym 5 times at week and I drink a lot of water. Honestly the problem is only the genetic.
Iron_Man

1 y
Post a picture of your face
Iron_Man

1 y
We’ll see what the problem is
Show All Show Less
ImOkayTy

1 y
I'm in a point of my life when I prefer a gun in front of my face rather than a camera. All I can say and I'm sure about it is that I'm pretty unnatractive.
Iron_Man

1 y
You should never be thinking about suicide just because you’re struggling on getting a girlfriend at the young age of 22 there’s always somebody out there for somebody
ImOkayTy

1 y
I never tought about suicide. I mean , in a certain point I will die so there is no rush and I'd rather feel something even sad than feel nothing. And... yea , I'm only in my early 20 but the thing is from now finding someone is gettind harder , not easier. If no one get interested in me untill now , I doubt it will in future , at least not in a physical way. I'm just a bit upset that I missed a lot of thing and people because the way I look. And that would never been a problem if it was just my past but I keep miss oportunities.
ImOkayTy

1 y
Now I see. I said that I prefer a gun over a camera. What I meant is that I'm more scared by a camera than a gun.
Iron_Man

1 y
You got the rest of your life to find an ugly Betty don’t worry about it

Answer 7

ImOkayTy

I'm living the healthiest way I could. Healthy food , vitamins , gym 5 times at week and I drink a lot of water. Honestly the problem is only the genetic.

Answer 8

Iron_Man

Post a picture of your face

Answer 9

Iron_Man

We’ll see what the problem is

Answer 10

ImOkayTy

I'm in a point of my life when I prefer a gun in front of my face rather than a camera. All I can say and I'm sure about it is that I'm pretty unnatractive.

Answer 11

Iron_Man

You should never be thinking about suicide just because you’re struggling on getting a girlfriend at the young age of 22 there’s always somebody out there for somebody

Answer 12

ImOkayTy

I never tought about suicide. I mean , in a certain point I will die so there is no rush and I'd rather feel something even sad than feel nothing. And... yea , I'm only in my early 20 but the thing is from now finding someone is gettind harder , not easier. If no one get interested in me untill now , I doubt it will in future , at least not in a physical way. I'm just a bit upset that I missed a lot of thing and people because the way I look. And that would never been a problem if it was just my past but I keep miss oportunities.

Answer 13

ImOkayTy

Now I see. I said that I prefer a gun over a camera. What I meant is that I'm more scared by a camera than a gun.

Answer 14

Iron_Man

You got the rest of your life to find an ugly Betty don’t worry about it

Answer 15

john23232323

Xper 5

Do something that you don't need to be goodlooking to be successful in.

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ImOkayTy

1 y
I'm doing , but the problem is that from time to time I remember that I'm doing this just because is a coping mechanism. I mean , everything you can do can't compete with the way someone feel about you. I could be something like Elon Musk , and invent or help people and be apreciated but the apreciation and the way a partner can feel about you is different.
john23232323

1 y
Why do you care how a partner feels about you if you're successful and have helped thousands of people with something? Life isn't all about girls liking you. They're not that special anyway.
ImOkayTy

1 y
Life isn't special anyway. It's borring and hard and doesn't matter how hard you try, doesn't matter how successful you are , you'll never get the feel that you're special. You should help people anyway and they don't have to think you are special or you to feel you're special because you helped them. The only way you could feel special is when your partner feel that for you , when you two think the same and nothing else matter. And it cost nothing , just a series of chemical reactions in your brain.
Show All Show Less
ImOkayTy

1 y
Helping people is a moral thing we should do it anyway. But the way your lover think about you is beyond everything , the greatest thing a human can feel.
john23232323

1 y
@ImOkayTy no it isn't. I've been in relationships. Girls have felt that way about me. It doesn't make me feel any better. The most important thing is how you feel about yourself. Almost every person on this world has a girlfriend or boyfriend, so how is you having a girlfriend special. If you are successful you will be an influence of thousands and maybe even millions of people. That is being a special person for me. And also i can't understand how you think that being attractive is gonna make a girl fall in love with you. It doesn't help much, later on you still fight, she might still cheat on you with someone ugly, and you'll end up as an unsuccessful 50 year old man and you'll also be single. So my advice: focus on your passion for work first.

Answer 16

ImOkayTy

I'm doing , but the problem is that from time to time I remember that I'm doing this just because is a coping mechanism. I mean , everything you can do can't compete with the way someone feel about you. I could be something like Elon Musk , and invent or help people and be apreciated but the apreciation and the way a partner can feel about you is different.

Answer 17

john23232323

Why do you care how a partner feels about you if you're successful and have helped thousands of people with something? Life isn't all about girls liking you. They're not that special anyway.

Answer 18

ImOkayTy

Life isn't special anyway. It's borring and hard and doesn't matter how hard you try, doesn't matter how successful you are , you'll never get the feel that you're special. You should help people anyway and they don't have to think you are special or you to feel you're special because you helped them. The only way you could feel special is when your partner feel that for you , when you two think the same and nothing else matter. And it cost nothing , just a series of chemical reactions in your brain.

Answer 19

ImOkayTy

Helping people is a moral thing we should do it anyway. But the way your lover think about you is beyond everything , the greatest thing a human can feel.

Answer 20

john23232323

@ImOkayTy no it isn't. I've been in relationships. Girls have felt that way about me. It doesn't make me feel any better. The most important thing is how you feel about yourself. Almost every person on this world has a girlfriend or boyfriend, so how is you having a girlfriend special. If you are successful you will be an influence of thousands and maybe even millions of people. That is being a special person for me. And also i can't understand how you think that being attractive is gonna make a girl fall in love with you. It doesn't help much, later on you still fight, she might still cheat on you with someone ugly, and you'll end up as an unsuccessful 50 year old man and you'll also be single. So my advice: focus on your passion for work first.

Answer 21

Anonymous

You probably judge a lot of people without looking in the mirror. This can be the problem to your dissatisfaction.

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ImOkayTy

1 y
Maybe I am , but after you are judged by others by the way you look is pretty damn hard to not do the same. After a while you feel forced to judge others before and get an ideea of what to expect.

Answer 22

ImOkayTy

Maybe I am , but after you are judged by others by the way you look is pretty damn hard to not do the same. After a while you feel forced to judge others before and get an ideea of what to expect.

Answer 23

pigoat | 1.5K opinions shared on Dating topic.

Guru

There is nothing you can do about it

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ImOkayTy

1 y
That's perhaps the only true answer I could get. I tried everything for a long period of time with no results. The only thing I could do is to lie myself to feel better.

Answer 24

ImOkayTy

That's perhaps the only true answer I could get. I tried everything for a long period of time with no results. The only thing I could do is to lie myself to feel better.