Would you ever get serious with someone hospitalized for depression?

[Jonn123]

Yes, I would want to end the relationship. Let me explain:

I've been in two relationships with someone who had some sort of mental illness. My 1 year ex had severe ADHD and childhood trauma. And the latest girl I dated had anorexia (twice), anxiety, epilepsy and severe childhood trauma that kept her up at night sometimes. This is not exactly 100% matching with your question, because as of my knowledge, neither of them were hospitalized because they attempted suicide/had depression. But it literally wouldn't surprise me if it had happened, and I should also notice that often times, people that have issues sometimes get more issues because of those issues. For example epilepsy often brings along anxiety, which could lead to depression further down the road.

Both "relationships" were really difficult to navigate. Constantly mixed feelings, confusion, frustration etc. from both parties. I'm personally way more patient than I was 2 years ago when I was with my ex, but I still cannot bring myself to be someone's lifesaver and wait around. They have to work on their issues, and often times that means that there isn't time or place for a romantic interest.

I've always been really interested in helping others. I used to practice active listening on 7cups, and I managed a big Discord community that gave out advice. But my personal motivation to help people can also be a curse when it comes to relationships, because I often want to save them. With my ex I felt like a mental illness was romantic, cause I could help them and in return I would get unconditional love. That is NOT actually how it works.

With my latest fling I realized that I couldn't help her, and so I cut things off. I still miss her, and it truly sucks. I won't go into detail describing it, because I just don't want to confuse myself even more.

However, as for your question; No I would not date someone hospitalized for depression if they STILL have the same issue (depression). If they were hospitalized at a young age, let's say they were 15 when it happened and now they're 23 and healthy, then sure! But I wouldn't date someone who's still battling something like depression. Way too many ups and downs for me.

[hahahmm]

If I'm IN a serious relationship with someone like that and they're otherwise being good to me I would try to help them. But I would never knowingly let myself fall into a serious situation with someone like that.

Those kinds of people - in my experience - get put on meds and then eventually they go off their meds and try killing themselves. Eventually they succeed. Sometimes they kill or try to kill other people too like a guy I know who tried killing himself with head on car collisions at one point. No thanks. You'd have constant stress/drama in your life over their situation and end up being like a mental hospital nurse. If you want to help people go become an actual nurse or psychologist where you can actually go home from work every day.

[Screenwriter]

I'm sure I'd be surprised at the revelation and I'd ask what had happened.
An attempt is no indication of anything. Maybe they were in a bad situation and felt that was the only way out.
Depression can be managed. I'd want to know if they were seeing someone and taking medication if this had been a longterm problem. Then I'd see where our relationship went.

[Gwenhwyfar]

I would. And I have. And people have gotten serious with me.

[JohnuaLee]

Yes.
I am very picky with dating. there's girls I find attractive and I'd love to play around with, but i won't even bother in the end. Not cause I'm scared, but because of the problems I can already see.
So if I were to date a person who I actually loved enough to ask out, learning that later probably won't change how I felt. I'm not going to change and feel sorry for them or think of them as weights. I'll love them as I have been, and I hope that reaches them.

[rjroy3]

Yes I would care. Yes it would affect my opinion if to some extent. How much and whether or not I'd cut the time short would be dependent on:

1. How long ago
2. Why
3. Was she or is she medicated for it?

It's largely about whether or not the things that lead to it being addressed and if it was long enough ago for me to see this is a more longterm change. Suicide attempt is a big deal and there's a lot around that.

[zeitgeist057]

I have dated cutters before and the only thing that changes is that I am concerned about them hurting themselves. The love is the same and maybe in some ways I am even more attracted to the vulnerability?

[Madhatter920]

I'd be concerned, sure, but I wouldn't want to the end the relationship. That's in the past. Are they doing relatively ok now? Are we ok? That's all that matters to me.

[TeeBar]

Everything in life is situational. I would find out WHY the person is depressed before making any decision. Often depression is a transient state or one that can be alleviated once the real cause is identified.

[Drumlin2001]

I'd want to know they had had help and were willing to be open and talk to me about issues as they came up. If they were bottling things which would likely trigger a relapse then i wouldn't

[MannMitAntworten]

I have dated someone who I later learned was hospitalized for depression and had attempted suicide before. I did not end things and I did not think differently of them. I just heard them out. Listening goes a long way.

[Agape93]

Sure I’d stay with them. Wouldn’t be the first time.

[SilverRain92]

I would want to give as much support as I can and to do whatever I can to prevent it from happening in the future. If I date a girl it means that I like her. Why would I date a girl and leave her when some shit happens?

[iseekpinetrees]

No id dump them. If someone is that depressed you cannot make them happy only they can turn their life around and make themselves happy. It would be a waste of my time. Frustration and emotions.

[Kaneki05]

yeah of course. And no it would change no thoughts on my opinion of dating them.

[msc545]

I know how to manage and mitigate depression in others, but I do it for a living and don't really want it in my personal life.

[Tea-Spaghetti]

No that’s a serious disability like losing a limb it would make it too difficult for me.

[Eleni079]

Depends if she getting help and talks to me about it or to someone about it.

[Pulseofsulfur]

I mean it would be too much for me to bear on my mental health. But then I don't want to leave that person because of their suicidal thoughts

[Twalli]

Depends i6n why. My siater was, but it was considered a medical certainty that the medication caused it.

[Anonymous]

Im seeing someone who has mental issues. She has tried to kill herself before we met. Every time she feels down in the dumps and feels like hurting herself she calls me and I talk her through it.

[Hmmmbetternothere]

You will get dragged down by him I think. Mental illnesses in partners is a real Mofo.

[Chittychittybang]

Well I have clinical depression. Most of the time, I’m just fine. I have maybe 2 bad days a month where I just sleep more. I don’t depression, or any other illness for that matter can define a person.

[TallAnon]

We all come with some baggage and a past. If it's a good woman, I wouldn't care.