What do you think about a guy asking a girl to pay for a date? (Page 2)

Question

so there's a guy I matched with on hinge who I went on 2 dates with. He planned & paid for the first date which I expected. However, for our second date, he chose the time & place again & instructed me to meet him where he chose. I met him at the restaurant he chose and expected him to pay because he planned it & invited me out. However, after we finished eating & got up from the table to start walking towards the counter, he suddenly asked 'you okay to get this?' & I was honestly really surprised & quite frankly, turned off too. However I just said 'oh yeah sure' & paid it. I don't know how to feel about that. I still sometimes don't fully know dating etiquette since I'm kinda new to the dating scene. I've previously only been in friends with benefits or fuckbuddy type relationships, so right after that date, I started googling if the girl is meant to pay on the second date, & I read a lot of answers saying that it is actually nice for the girl to pay on the second date to return the favour if the guy paid for the first one. I then started feeling a bit bad that I hadn't offered to pay for the second date. Maybe him asking me to pay for our second dinner was his way of reminding me that it's my turn to pay? There was also another guy I went on 2 dates with before finally cutting it off with him. He was from tinder. He paid for our first date, but for our second date we ordered from his phone (cause the restaurant we went to has an electronic menu that you scan the QR code for) to avoid having to order separately from both our phones. Later that night though, he texted me asking if I can transfer him for half of the dinner with payID using his phone number. He sad 'I'm soooo sorry I don't mean to be rude but I used my work bank account to pay & they get suspicious if they see too much being spent from it' which was very clearly the biggest lie. I just agreed & transferred him the money. I found it very unattractive though.

Jaylenn · Answer

Pitiful.. if he's too poor for an official date, meet at a park, have a chat first, then tell her your saving money because your in between jobs and have a great reason why,. when there is so many jobs out there..

LiamJHayden · Answer

Unless it is discussed beforehand, the asker should assume that he or she will be paying.

TallAnon · Answer

The reality is that everyone has different morals, values, etc. Talk about it. It's very rare that two people have the exact same expectations, one of you is going to have the "Wait, what" moment sooner or later. If you don't like how he does things and he's not open to change; Next.

Keishio · Answer

I think if you're dating a woman with the intent of it leading somewhere then playing the game it's always been played is the best way to go. Once a relationship is on the cards it's either or, I'll take a partner out, partners have took me out but 99% of the time it's a 50/50 thing. I'd only have an issue of the relationship was confirmed but I'm still paying for every single night out as if it it's expected because I'm the man and she's the woman. We don't live in that world anymore

Hardworkingguy · Answer

Well I think it's pretty strange for a man to ask the girl to pay for the entire bill.. during the first day it is the best to pay for everything yourself and after that if the girl wants to help you pay half of it I suppose it's okay but I would never ask her to pay for everything.

PizzaPieMamaBear · Answer

Sweetheart you need to screen these guys better. This is awful!!! No they should be paying they’re taking you out!! Can I ask you what you see in these guys why you’re going out with them?

milkov · Answer

He asked you out and picked the place. He should've paid. Or before actually planning, he should've told you if you're okay with paying for the second date. What if you didn't have money on you that time?
Nah red flag 🚩

Anonymous · Answer

You should have said "I'm not the one that invited you"... and when he said he used his work bank account you should have said "does this look like work? It's not my fault you're irresponsible with money!"

Miristheiss · Answer

Whoever asked the other to come on the date should pay.

Ligerzzero · Answer

Think that’s what needs to start happening, because odds are she is just going on a sat because she wants a nice dinner and has no intention of dating.

xJayleenx · Answer

Nowadays it’s like that my boyfriend is a really good guy and he does this too so I would still give him a chance. Now it’s expected for couples to split the bill.

Lanabae · Answer

He took the initiative to plan the date and ask you out so he should pay. Blindsiding you once the date is over isn’t really cool. If I ask a guy out and I want to see him and plan a date, I would make it my treat. In dating it shouldn’t always be a guy paying but he initiated the date. Then, if it went well on the next time you guys want to see each other, you could plan the date and say I’ve got this.

IveGotNoName · Answer

Personally I always expect it to be 50/50 regardless of who asked who. However, if the person who invited me on a date offers to pay the whole bill I won't fight them on it.

Finchie40 · Answer

Yea that was pretty pathetic on his part he invited you out again so he should of paid , the fact that he asked you I would dump his ass as well lol

Adam1978 · Answer

No that is not right, because you should then make the picks so it fit what your willing to pay. You can't expect others to pay for your own choices.

jamesgoldman · Answer

It's normal these days no I never asked they just paid, suppose they didn't have a choice if they wanted to drink as I couldn't legally back then

Anonymous · Answer

in these times i feel like it's understandable. inflation sucks.

next time i feel like you two (whoever you're dating next) should talk about how you're going to split the bill before ordering. that way no surprises.

ShellyB · Answer

In that situation, I would pay for it, then ghost him. Sorry if that bothers anybody, JMO!

Stevefiveo · Answer

The guy should be a man and pay for all of the dates.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

I see people do this a lot but I'm old school I'll always pay I feel if a guy can't afford to pay then he shouldn't be dating

What do you think about a guy asking a girl to pay for a date? (Page 2)

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