Why don't women want what I'm offering?

I'm no saint, and I'm not the best guy in the world, I'm more or less avarage. But I do try to offer as much as I can. I could make a list of things that I offer but really lets just say I do what I can. I'm the guy who just likes to make the one I'm with feel special.

I've just been turned down for about the hundreth time, this person knows me she has been with me, she knows how I am. I bought her a bracelet put the bracelet in a card that said we should rekindle out relationship... one time I wrote a poem saying something similar, you can see a pattern here. I always do something special and try to ask a girl out that I've known or hung out with, one that knows me and what I have to offer. I got turned down every time.

I'm just getting very angry with women, the question keeps popping in my head what's wrong with me, why don't women want what I'm offering. 22 years old and never actually had a "girlfreind" just a few women whom I have flirted with but they never want it to go further, or women who will hang out and have sex but don't want a relationship.

okay I'm not the type to get agressive and I'm not attacking the female gender... when I say I'm angry with women its not me attacking them but more me just saying I'm tired of getting hurt, and rejected 'cause even though we hang out and have a good time they just don't want me (god that sounds whiny but its how I feel)


Most Helpful Girl

  • If getting a relationship with anyone was about doing what we can, life would be easy. It isn't about doing what we can, it is about doing things that would cause another person to connect to us. It isn't even about being amazing, it is still about what another person needs to connect to us emotionally.

    So, not sure what you are or are not doing that is standing in the way, but the only common denominator in all these hit and miss deals for you is...you. You can get as angry as you want with women, but that won't fix the situation either.

    Oh, and in case you think I am just another one of those evil females, hey, I have been in this situation myself. 2 years of dating guys that either were not for me, or were for me but apparently I was not for them. It was super frustrating. One time I asked a friend who told me I was a great catch, "Well if I am such a great catch, why hasn't anyone caught me." There was no answer for that. I just had to be patient. Good luck.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 5

  • There is nothing wrong with you, just your choice in women. The type of women that interest you are probably interested in the "bad boy" persona. Although you could be an attractive guy, females might see you has the softee who would probably not defend her when she needs it. My advice is not to change your personality because with your attributes by the time you are 26-30 some sensible woman will sweep you up and those women who were looking for the greener grass will be living in deep regret.

    • yes, on the 'don't change' advice... Although I'd caution him to stay away from 'reformed' women who 'used' to be into bad boys, let them stew in their dirty diaper for life.

    • thats what I said Shaun. (in a nut shell) that the bad girls looking for greener grass will be living in deep regret while he is with his sweetheart sensible girl

    • I misread, my apologies. : )

  • dont act desperate , chase the girl for a bit THEN make her chase you , don't come on too strong and be friendly :) hope this helps

    • yeah they never chase back... I mean some do but for some reason they just stop all contact (usually they fine another guy).

    • good luck with that :)

  • @shaun (I'd write on his comment but he blocks everybody) so you think it's better for a girl to pick any guy and then mold him and change him into what she wants him to be, than to find a guy that she likes just the way he is? WTF is wrong with you?

  • 1) Are you going for girls physically out of your league?

    2) Are you doing these nice things because you're desperate for approval and acceptance?

    3) Are you confident and secure in yourself or do you come off as needy and a pushover?

    These 3 things will hinder you in the dating world.

    • I go for the girl I enjoy spending time with, I do the nice things cause that's me, desprate or not I just like to do nice things to show them they are special to me, and in the past I used to be wishy washy and I learned real quick to have confidance, and more importantly just be real, to be with someone I have to be comfortable being myself around them

  • I think that women are tired of settling for less than what they could have and feel they deserve just for the sake of taking what a guy is offering.

    Like, in my opinion all of those sweet things you do like writing poem and doing something special means sh*t if you lack certain things like loyalty, being genuine, being protective, being intelligent, being a source of inner peace for me, being supportive, and so much more.

    It doesn't mean sh*t to me.

    I've never and will never just hang out and have sex and not have a relaitonship. So it comes down to this...

    - either you are just meeting the wrong types of girls

    - girls don't want what you're selling.

    • those 2 options are tired and played out I meet the wrong type of girl and get tired of this no relationship bs. and the girl that don't want what I'm selling just don't know me. I am tired of women who judge me on their preconcive notions, the guy who "looks" like a good catch turnes out to be a jerk... I employ any woman who thinks I lack anything important to me to put me to the test

    • I guess lol but I know it feels good to vent and all, but you need to address the actual women who are doing it instead of getting online complaining to us because it's not like we're the ones who did it to you

What Guys Said 2

  • Sounds like you could be coming on to strong. You should never give a girl you like a present unless you are already in a relationship. It makes you look desperate. Also not all women like romantic men.

    Don't get angry with women, because they can't help being attracted to certain traits. I don't mean this to sound mean, but it really is you, that needs to change. You need to change how you are presenting yourself to women, because as it is, they are misreading what you are. Sure you may be a great guy that would never mistreat a woman, but they may be seeing it as you being desperate.

  • Women think there'll be plenty of time later to settle down with an average guy, if they can't get their hooks into an exceptional one.

    Back in the day, women used to grab a guy and make him into what she wanted... now girls think they can order guys as if off a menu. I predict a LOT of frustrated women in 10 years or so... and it's going to be fun to watch. :D

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