What do you do to kill the pain, when a dating experience ends unexpectedly?

Ok so I have been dating this guy a little over a month. yes, I know that is a very short time, but not short to develop feelings when you talk for 2 hours everyday and hang out constantly. There was immense chemistry. I am a quiet person, and we would talk easily for 2 hours a might with no awkard silent moments. He showed signs of caring, holding myhands, even admitted there was a connection, would just stare into my eyes for minutes and play with my face lovingly. He refused to let me pay for anything. When we talked we had so much in common it was actually scary. Like he was the male version of me. He even admitted it, saying the only thing we don't have in common is that I don't like rap music like he does.

He would make an attempt to fit me in his busy schedule, and things started off slow. We didn't kiss til the third date. He is very insecure about his looks, intelligence, and paranoid I will use him for money or leave him like the previous women. Demonstrated by how he always brings this up.

Out of the blue he hits me with the " I am not ready for a relationship" bomb. I never even expected this at all. No signs, no nothing. He then asked what I was doing later that night, and told me his brother and sister in law wanted to meet me...i was so shocked and hurt I just had to get off the phone.

I am devastated, crying, an dhurt...how do I cope? I know it wasn't long but the connection was intense. Intense for me to cutt off all other men and lose interest. I feel like a fool that I feel this way after only a month and a half, but I do. I am 26 and been on MANY dates, but never felt like this before.


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  • Hang in there, I had a guy do this to me once... Explain that you're not interested in sex if he's not interested in some amount of a commitment... be it labeled a relationship or exclusive dating or whatever he wants to call it. The fact that he wants to introduce you to family, after saying that, means he's still interested, just a bit nervous... Give it time, it'll get better and he'll calm down!

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