MENS ADVICE NEEDED Does my ex want me back?

We were together for 6 years, not living together. We never argued, but he doesn't talk much and didn't know how he felt. If I asked how things were, about every 6 months he'd say he was having doubts if we were right or wrong. He'd say everything was good, but he is superficial. OR that he's NEVER felt a reltionship was 'right' after about 6months.So id say, fine we will split up and be friends.if you find its just fear, come back. I too have trouble with relationships.other than loving frienship. He would always come back.BUT feel bad every 6months, like he was being unfaithful thinking of other women.

SO last time we split, he ran off and joined internet dating (VERY undignified for him!), first girl he met online, he is still with 6 months later.(shes 10 years older than me) that time he has cried on the phone and told me he may want me back, he has hugged me lingeringly, mentioned being worried that he&i may play up if given the opportunity.

i have been crazy this whole time. broken hearted, BUT being friendly and trying to work through the pain so we remain friends. I still go and stay at his place and he KNOWS not to suggest that I would touch him innapropriately while he has a new woman.

The thing is.because he has a woman now, I can't exactly ask him how its going and does he want me back? He comments on my body and he said we didn't have bad times in our relationship. And how lucky we are to be friends. And our last passionate night tigther how great it was. would he say those things just to make me feel good?

I love him & don't want to mess up our friendship with my old feelings.BUT I also don't want to lose something that maybe worth resurrecting.cos he seems to be looking at our relationship as having been 'only good times'. Maybe he's missing what he lost? And he can't dump new girl unless he KNOWS id take him back or we talk about it? You see, I catn discuss the future with him, because I feel its dishonouring the relationship he is in.

Through the whole 7 years I've known him, he has always always worked and talked through things to make it nicer. We have loads in common and have more of a best friendship, than a traditional man/woman thing.

I think he's silly to get rid of someone who he says was the sweetest best most understandin gal men really leave that, just to get a prettier girl.just for a change? is it menopause? He said he feels conflicted about his feelings for me and is trying to focus on the new woman.BUT when I offered to stay away or gove him space for awhile because I do not want to be the cause of issues for them, he wouldn't let me go. he said he didn't want space and invited me to visit! I'm very confused. I'm not sure he knows what he wants.ANY advice welcome guys!


Most Helpful Guy

  • Take it as my opinion nothing else, but this guy likes you but doesn't see you as the best girl for him, its like second best in a way. He likes and loves you but is not in love with you.

    There are some things he needs to work on because I don't even think this girl he is with will feel that void.

    I think they is a girl somewhere in his past who might have been and is always wondering what could have happened, so he needs to deal with that and then he can fully be emoitionally available to you.


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What Guys Said 2

  • ok I didn't read your paragraph at all but only the initial question.

    The key with you girls (this question comes up a lot on this site) is that whatever he is doing NOW, isn't what he was doing THEN (when you were dating) so DON'T get back with him because you THINK he wants you back. If he wanted you, pleased you, made you feel special enough in the FIRST place then you guys wouldn't have broken up. So ya he wants you back but it's USUALLY not because he LOVES you. He just wants the FEELING of having a girlfriend. Good luck babe.

  • so you broke up every 6 months?

    sounds like he might need council ling.


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