Dated her.. I was told up front we'd be only friends?

there's this girl from my church I asked her out a few months ago.. she told me right on the date that she only wanted friends..

shes got a good guy.. I was OK.. and we had a great time..

we went out a few more times.. nothing real big..

but then we kinda stopped talking.. mainly because I had to reset my phone and I lost her number.. but at church I say hi all the time.. then this other guy started talking to her and we kinda lost evermore communications at that point..

so anyway.. her boyfriend is leaving for 2 years in a day..

and so her last official date with him was 4 days ago.. she told me.. anyway since then she has texted me everyday for the 4 days.. he hasn't left yet but he's going soon.. anyway.. the first day she texted me we went to the same activity and met up there.. her friends drove her there but she wanted to leave early (I have to wonder) because she contacted me and asked if I could take her and her friend home..(obviously not the won that drove them up) anyway.. I was about to leave so I was OK with it.. and after I dropped off her friend.. we talked out side her friends house for a while.. and she kept back tracking what she was saying.. like..

"I will wait for him.. well unless something better comes by while he's gone"

"If I seem like I was upset at you at church I'm sorry I'm not.. if I ever am I really don't mean it."

"that guy at church doesn't like you because he's trying to get with me and he thinks your a threat.. but he's got no chance with me and so your not a threat :) .."


her "that guy gives me some odd compliments.. like your dashing"

ME "Well I would just say your beautiful.."

her. "thanks" :)

ME "id also say your cute.. but most girls don't like being called cute they think it sound childish"

her "I don't I like it.. It sound spunky" :)

and I gave her one of the coats out of my car at this point.. I took the colder one for myself, gave her the warm one..

and like I said since then she's texted me everyday.. just for random stuff though

I don't know.. I wouldn't mind asking her out again.. and see if something happens.. and I don't have much to lose.. I mean we already weren't talking much until now and her boyfriend is leaving.. If I'm reading the signals right Id say she wants me to at least try something..

any thoughts? should I should I not?..


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  • Judging from the "unless something better comes by while he's gone" it sure appears that way and I'd probably take that as a sign of interest myself aswell.


    She conciders you as her guy friend she can actually talk about anything with(confidant), which also includes other guys.(Aka the "gay best friend")

    As I don't know you, don't know how you act around her and don't know her, its pretty hard for me to judge which one it'll more likely be.

    Good luck figuring it out

    • Like I said this is the most we've talked in months..

      Id always say hi to her in church..

      We've went on the first date.. But then just hung out as friends twice.. Over about a years time..

      Other then that we didn't talk much..

      But now her boyfriend is leaving.. She's talking alot

    • That still says nothing.

      The thing is, her boyfriend is leaving. She might just want someone(/people) to talk to and hang out with as a "temporarely replacement" and friends could be sufficient for that.

      You might've filled that spot fairly quickly because she feels comfortable around you, appreciated and flattered but not planning to let it lead anywhere further then friendship.

      She might want more then that (possibly in the future) but like I said, its hard to tell.

  • She has you if she would lose her 'current' boyfriend... SO I would say, keep on waiting, keep on working... it may pay off.

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