Can a potential relationship be salvaged?

I was dating this guy a little over a month. We saw each other once or twice a week. Things were going really well and we would talk for hours when we hung out. We spent most of our time at his apartment, but most talked. Around the two week I was tired of instigating that we should hang out or if I would ask him to do something he said couldn't or was too tired. At first it didn't bother me, but it got more annoying. During the third week we were dating I called him and we had a half an hour talk about how annoyed I had been with him. He said that he had felt pressured from me and said he was "putting" on the brakes of starting something more serious because on our first date I told him I would be going to graduate school in a year and I didn't know where I would be. After we talked, I thought everything was okay. Him not really calling and texting was getting super annoying again. I was being passive aggressive and making posts on Facebook containing quotes or music that hinted at my annoyance, but I did not outright say it to his face right away. We were tentatively going to do something over Thanksgiving weekend. On Thanksgiving I got a text from him saying happy thanksgiving. He talked about random stuff and I didn't hear from him on Friday, Saturday or Sunday. I was leaving the gym on Sunday when I saw his car. We go to the same gym. My stomach dropped because I was really confused with what was going on with us. I ignored his car hoping it wasn't him and then he blasted his horn. I turned and he and I started talking for ten minutes about nothing important. Finally, we sat in his car and talked about everything. He said that he felt pressured from me to be more than what we were or what he could give me at the moment. He said it was childish that I would post hints of what was going on on Facebook and not talk to him straight out. He was right and I was being super passive aggressive. He said it was like "throwing rocks at him" that all of this was going on and that I should have just talked to him about it. He said my behavior was pushing him away. But then he turned really sweet and said, "Damn. You are so pretty. Why do you have to be so pretty?" We hugged and kissed a little bit and went our own ways. I texted him the next day saying that I hoped he was having a good day. He said thanks and that it was rough. That's the last I heard of him. Should I just ask him where we go from here? Or just let him make contact? I don't want to make it worse, but I don't want to lose him either. Advice?


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What Guys Said 2

  • Perform loving acts or behave lovingly rather than scare the guy away with words.

    • How do I do that when I obviously haven't heard from him?

    • If you haven't heard from him, you can safely assume he's not into you. Always judge someone by their behavior and not their words. You're pretty, right? Smile at some guys at Starbucks and find someone who will be crazy about you.

  • Just perform loving acts rather than saying anything to him and driving him away.


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