My boyfriend doesn't hang out with any other people?

I've been with my boyfriend for 8 months and we live together, He moved here a year ago from another state but he doesn't really have any friends here except people I've introduced him to or friends of mine. he really only likes to spend time with me. is this right? he certainly doesn't have a pack of guy friends, but he's not really that kind of guy.

Is it just him or a maturity thing, I'm not sure.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, I think you first have to consider that different people have different "friendship styles". Some people are very social, make friends easily, and have lots of friends. Some people are very particular about their friends and prefer to only have a few (and because they're picky about who they're friends with, they often have a more difficult time making friends), some people would like more friends, but have difficulty making them, and some people are more "loner" types (who don't really care or want to have many friends). I don't see any of these styles as better or worse than the others, they're just different.

    Keep in mind too, that it can be difficult to make friends when you move to a new place, particular when you're older (often there are less opportunities, or the people you do meet might already have a close social network or have families that they devote all their time to).

    So, I think the two questions that you should ask are:

    1. Is he truly happy without having his own group of friends? This might be a little tricky to answer, since it isn't a matter of thinking about how YOU would feel in his position, but thinking about how HE feels. If he's more of a loner-type, he might be fine without having his own group of friends.

    2. Is it that you're the only person he wants to spend time with, or is it that he wants to spend all his time with you? Those are two different things. If you're the only person he wants to spend time with, I don't necessarily see that as a problem (especially if he's a loner by choice). However, if he wants to spend all his time with you, I would see that as a problem. It's important for a couple to spend some time apart, have their own interests and hobbies, etc. and it wouldn't be a healthy relationship if he is completely dependent on you.

    Optimally, even if he is a loner, I think it would be better if he had a friend or two (or family nearby) other than you, so that he isn't completely reliant on you, but keep in mind that not everyone has an easy time making friends and sometimes it takes awhile.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Not easy to make friends when you're in the working world and busy all of the time.


What Girls Said 2

  • Make him go out. It's not healthy to ALWAYS be with you and the circle YOU introduce him to. It's a sign that he's getting lazy about fulfilling his own desires. Tell him you need to go hang out with the girls one afternoon and MAKE him go out on his own if he doesn't come up with the concept on his own. Do you know any of the people he used to hang out with before you two met? Ask one of them to give him a call. Maybe get his family involved...

  • I totally disagree with dishlady down there. You don't need to get his family involved, jesus not being a social butterfly does not mean someone is having a crisis. It's probably just that as an adult especially in a new environment it's really difficult to meet good friends or maybe he's just not into going out that much and would just rather hang at home with his girlfriend. Some people are just like that but I don't think there's anything wrong with them necessarily for being like that.