What is the procedure for a "date"?

So I am friends with a girl that I now like, and I want to further the relationship.

How I have seen it happen is the guy asks the girl "to get coffee" and then he starts making moves, kissing, etc. on the first date.

So if I want to go on a "date" with her, do I just say "let's get coffee" and then when I make the move she assumes that it is a date and that I like her?

Or do I tell her that I like her and then we go on a date where she knows that I like her in that way?

Background info:

We are both 16 and juniors and high school

We have hung out a couple times, where I didn't make a move because we were more friends.

We have known each other for a year, but I would say friends since September.

If you need any other info, let me know.



Most Helpful Guy

  • if she gives you honest signs of wanting a reltionship,like holding hands any kind of touching really..but if she just says how she feels instead of showing it honestly she is not ready just stay friends and let more time progress she won't hate you..cause if she really and truly wants a date then she will make it happen..i try to make some moves and it went in the wrong direction but I'm still friends nothing wrong with that..when you have know her long enough you will know if she needs a man..trust me.hope I helped

    • can I just tell her?... I hate these things where things are implied...

    • can I just tell her that I like her?... I hate these things where it is just implied... so much room for misinterpretation on both sides.

    • its not a good idea to tell them because then when the balls in there court they tend to not shoot..what I'm saying is give a hint or sign of interest but never say it because if she's paying attention she will know but if she doesn't catch on its because she didn't want to and then things get weird..like my situation.just think about the way she acts around you is she belivable?

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • "Procedure"? As ease, soldier, it's a date, not a military drill! (smile)

    Breathe and relax, then do what comes naturally.

    -- Did you ask this girl out yet? If so, keep it short and simple (30-45 minutes) and set another date (an hour or more) soon after that. Since you're friends, the shorter one should feel normal.

    -- If you DIDN'T ask her out yet, you may very well want to come clean about your feelings and ask her if she'd like to try going out on a date. It makes the most sesnse since you know each other well.

    -- Don't rush everything into one date, don't press to kiss her unless you see that she clearly is expecting to be kissed.

  • Ask her out to coffee. If you don't think she gets that you're interested in more than friendship, then after the date, just tell her "hey, I like you a lot--we should do this again," and see how she responds.


What Guys Said 1

  • Well once your friends already and have not made a move for a long time it can be dificult to reverse the situation even if you got an injection of game into you. that said, the standard procedure would be NOT to verbally express your "like" for someone, but when you meet up for a coffee, take her by the hand right away as soon as you meet her, easy

    • I think being straightforward is best. There are certainly bad ways to verbally express your interest in someone, but there are plenty of good ways too.

    • Show All
    • agree never verbally express interest in a women its giving her to much power in the next move girls want to play the passive role more often

    • Probably, my philosophy was never to find out the WHY of something, but to do WHAT works, I let scientists figure out the why (and they don't usually get laid a lot). And what works is to increase the physical contact, let her know your intent through your actions rather than words, leave talking up to the women to do

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