Why isn't he texting?

I went on a first date with this guy this past weekend and we had a really good time. I liked him a lot. When the date was over we agreed to meet up again and he told me that his schedule was open, pretty much putting the ball in my court to ask him.

Well I texted him the other day and after a few texts he asked me if I wanted to do something that night, well I couldn't but we agreed to go out tonight. He again, told me to let him know when was a good time for me. Again, putting the ball in my court. I'm not sure why he's doing this. Should I wait for him to text/call me or should I go ahead making the moves for this date and then leave it up to him? We haven't talked other than to schedule get togethers, so I'm not sure if this means he's not interested or just isn't a big phone person. I know he's not busy.


Most Helpful Guy

  • alot of guys aren't very good at phone contact..we are brought up and taught to be physicial like talking face to face or touching..im the same as him he's not being lazy or anything he's just getting a feel for you guys don't get emotional over night it usaully takes something stupid like bumping your head or falling at work for us to think about women..no offense..but maybe like I said earlier he's just getting a feel for you because we all know a man doesn't lead the relationship women do we can manage the small thinks..but its not to good when he's not trying because its not fair to you but he might not like you as much as you like him so babystep him into things if he doesn't pick up speed just wait on him if not just move on..not saying things should go fast because it last longer with a better foundation which is only built over time..


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What Guys Said 1

  • So you're telling me he asked you if you wanted to do something the other night and you told him that you couldn't. Fine.

    Then you're confused because he wanted to know when it was a good time for you for tonight?

    What is confusing about that exactly?

    • I'm confused that I'm initiating everything, he hasn't tried to initiate talking to me once in between dates

    • From his perspective, you've already said no to him once. Regardless of whether or not there's a good reason for that no, it was still a no. So he's basically saying, hey let me know when you have time to hang out.

      And maybe you're right, he just may not be that big of a phone person. I know I'm not.

What Girls Said 1

  • Well, I do find that we often have pretty good gut instincts about whether someone is interested or not. Any guy that I have had a relationship with wouldn't just leave it up to me to tell him when I was free. They would ask in advance for a date, tell me what they wanted to do and what time they wanted to get together and I would say yes or let them know if that time wasn't good for me and offer up another option to them.

    I am definitely suspect of someone who says their schedule is open and then does nothing to secure you for the next date. That is not what guys in hot pursuit do.

    However, for the sake of argument you could give it another shot and text him with a time you are available to go out tonight and see what he comes back with. If he is trying to blow you off he will continue to be wishy washy and you will figure out pretty quickly that nothing much is going to come of this. Good luck.