A guy who asks you out for drinks rather than dinner?

Does that necessarily mean that he's just interested in sex? Or is it more like it's not even really a date so just chose something where the two of you don't have to spend hours together and he can leave after just one drink?

I assume the very fact that he asked the girl to go out at all means that he doesn't find her totally replusive.
more specifically, he asked if I wanted to go for drinks. When I asked if he knew any good restaurants, he said no but he knows some good bars.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I actually believe that when men (or women, because I've done it too) ask someone out for drinks it is mainly because:

    1. they don't know you well & they don't want to commit to spending a lot of time with you in case you two don't get along well. (i.e., boring, no spark, crazy, etc.)

    2. meeting for drinks is kind of like a pre-date "interview"...do I want to date this person?

    3. I don't want to spend money on this person yet, not until I know that I like them better.

    • Too feel more comfortable, you should suggest going to a nice restaurant bar. Not a "bar-bar." You find a couple that you are comfortable with, then you will feel better about it. And stick to only 2 drinks.

    • Thanks for B.A.

      Good luck on your search for "the one."

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 5

  • This is a very original question...five-star rating for you. :)


    I don't think the "drinks" vs "dinner" date is a "f*ck buddy" vs "serious girl"...


    ...it's more imo of a "casual date" vs "formal date".

    He may think that a dinner date is too formal/serious and not as light-heared/fun.

    Believe it or not...he may be worried about scaring YOU off by a formal dinner date. :)

    • do you think it's actually more because he wants it to be clear that it's not even a date but just the two of you hanging out though?

  • It's pretty common these days to just meet for a few drinks and see where it goes from there. A lot less pressure and people can just get to know each other instead of doing a bunch of random stuff together. Plus, women are so damn flaky that what guy even wants to plan a whole evening when so many women flake on us.

  • good god, stop over-thinking it!

    Just worry about how you're gonna knock his ass over with your bomb ass self and MAKE HIM take you out on a legit first date. Drinks are to see if you're even worth spending 100 bucks on. I won't take a girl out unless I know she's worth every penny. B**ches will be using guys for free food and company SMH

  • Its a mini date.

    If he's asking you for drinks before last call, he might be angling for sex. If you are meeting for drinks after work, that suggests getting to know each other and seeing if you want a longer date.

  • It's quite possible he knows he'd be more relaxed around you if he has a couple drinks in him. Some guys still need that bottle of nerve so don't read too much into it as it could be something as simple as that.


What Girls Said 2

  • I have heard the general rule that it's a booty call only if he asks to meet you at 11pm or later. So if you're meeting for drinks and you want to be more than a booty call but he suggests 11pm, suggest an earlier time and just get out of there before he tries to take you back to his place.

    Asking you to go for drinks is a perfectly suitable way to ask you out because he simply wants to get to know you and wants to keep it light and casual. Dinner is a bit more "serious" than drinks, and I can almost guarantee that if after going for drinks he wants to see you again, he'll ask you to dinner.

    • hmm it's for around 8pm so I guess it's not too too bad ... but really is it so casual that it's not even really a date? More just like hanging out though? lol I can't believe at this age I'm still getting fussed about these minor details but there we have it :)

    • Haha it's a date. Just a casual get-to-know-you date, but a date :P Not "just hanging out".

      We all do, don't sweat it ;)

    • Its a date. Drinks is standard for a first date, at least in my demographic.

  • Might be trying to get you drunk so you'll go home with him


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