What to do about this situation? Part of me wants to be friends and the other wants to give up.

I like him alot, I actually love him. We begin to hang around each other at school. We talked on the phone and hung out at school during our breaks and went to breakfast before school every other morning.During this time, he would let me know who he was on the phone with when he would receive a phone call or if he has a friend he would tell me who the person was. I have met his sister and he told his grandma about me. Around this time I found out that he had been married before and got a divorce a few months back. During breakfast he told me about his exwife, saying that she is crazy and would start drama over petty stuff. I have been invited to his house on 2 occasions but never made it. During Christmas break I visited him at his new house and enjoyed myself. We did however have sex. After my visit around Christmas he started kinda distancing himself from me. When I would call we did talk on the phone. Two weeks before new years eve he promised to spend it with me over at a friends house, who was having a party. Three days before ny's eve he claim he could not come because of a family issue. On the day he claim he would try to come later that night. At midnight I called to wish him happy new year and he did not answer the phone. 15mins later I got a call back from his phone and some woman asked me why was I calling him. So instead of arguing with her I hung up. She called back and I told her that it is none of her business about me and him. He called me later while she was in the background arguing with him. Weeks passed and school started on the first day I knew once I got back I would not talk to him. I deleted him from myspace and blocked him from calling me. On that day I went to speak to a friend, he grabbed me and apologized for new years and said the woman was his ex wife and she apparently popped up over his sister house, went through his phone and called a lot of ppl. So I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Two weeks ago I went over his house, we drank and everything, but we did not have sex. He actually did not want it. He said the last time we did it that it messed him up. He claim he did not want to get attached to anyone and that sex does that to him. So I decided to leave him alone. every time I try to ignore him he ask my friends what is wrong and he always got to say something to me. Recently I cursed him out , but he claims me and him have a strong connection and that he care about me, and he is worth loving. My friend called him the next day to talk about me cursing him and the ex-wife was driving him home. She got mad when he said my name, but when he said my friends name she did not get mad. He always compare me to her when we have an altercation. I tried to ignore him again at school, but he got upset because I did not speak to him. He started calling me again to help him with math, but the convo went elsewhere. I like him but I don't know how to handle this. I do want to be friends. Men pls help me out with this one!

This guy told me that I was weird the other day. He said that one minute I am distant towards him then the next I am regular and some days I act like both. He was saying I don't talk to him like I use to and that he need me to be his friend.


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What Guys Said 1

  • It sounds as though he really needs to get stuff straightened out with his ex-wife before he gets into a friendship or relationship with any woman. Does he have kids with her, is that why he keeps finding himself around her?

    He's got to straighten things out with this woman, and he needs to do it right away. You need to let him know that he's got to do that before you'll get involved with him. You really don't need to deal with the extra drama.

    By the way, rent Tyler Perry's "Why Did I Get Married" one night. One of the storylines in there is about a couple where the man is dealing with his ex-wife and his current wife is having issues with the fact that he hasn't taken care of it yet. Your situtaion sort of reminds me of that.

    • From what I was told, not too sure, but they do not have children together. I also have an update.

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