Trouble falling in love again. Any tips to get back on your feet?

Hello all, thank you for your time and responses.

My question is fairly simple.

After about 3 years of an on again off again with my ex whom I was in love with, I am finally starting to see the benefits of being on my own from her and focusing on other people. I am more carefree and fun loving.

There is only one problem. Since my ex was the one who "broke my heart", as it were, I have had trouble mustering up the "excitement" to meet new people. The opportunities have been there. I have met girls who attracted to me, but I can't always seem to re-tap that old enthusiasm I used to have, the same enthusiasm I had when I met my ex for the first time. I understand that after being heart broken, you tend to view love a little less dramatically, but what can I do to mentally and [psychologically get myself back in the game? Any advice appreciated.


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What Girls Said 1

  • How long has it been since you two stopped seeing each other? It's perfectly normal to not be up to dating for awhile after a break up. It takes time to completely heal, and if any part of you is still hung up on the ex (whether that be consciously or unconsiously in your mind) it'll be difficult to completely enjoy spending time with other women. Instead of focusing on what you need to do to date, I would focus on just getting back to the true you. Both times I left a long term relationship, it took me a good deal of time to tap back into exactly who I was. I hadn't even realized I'd lost myself until I had all this extra time in the day, with none of it commited to anyone else. This is your time, be selfish, do things for yourself that you've been putting off. If you focus on yourself like this, the dating part will just come naturally. You won't be forcing yourself at all, if you were, it'd be what they call a rebound. Rebound relationships can sometimes help you move on from the past, but they tend up causing unnecesary pain for the new GF, because she's dating a guy who isn't ready to give her his heart. This doesn't sound like your style, so once again, I would just focus on bettering yourself and when she's comes along, you'll be ready.


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