How Long Before You Start Dating Again after you Break up?

Ok so the guy I went out on a date with a few months ago wrote on my wall on Friday, "I think we need another fishing trip w/a side of desert" which was our first date. He got out of a relationship in the beginning of January. So his best friend tells me he was planning on asking me out this weekend but was "I'm not really interested in dating anyone right now." Is this normal? How long does it take to get over it? Is he just hurt that he was dumped and scared of getting hurt again or what?


Most Helpful Girl

  • well, there's no specific number of days when it comes to getting over someone. It's purely a case to case basis. I've met people who still love their ex even if they are already flirting with someone else. So, it's like they are the rebound! Someone who can help them forget the ex! But of course, they won't admit that. Who would ever want to know that someone asked them on a date because their date needs someone who'll be their rebound girl/boy?!?!So the point here is this... once a person decided to date again, whether it's just a few days or months or years ago since the break up, it won't really matter. And you won't know that he is over his ex not unless he is open in admitting it (which is impossible!).but let's admit it, we all have done it before, we've been there. And all we really want is to make the pain go away, so what we do is we go out and date other people,not with the intention of using them (to be your rebound) but because we see that as a step to heal the pain that we have inside. So please do understand this, time heals all wounds and time also reveals the hidden, so be patient and wait for that time when he gets over it (if that time is not now). And know what you want to be in his life, his rebound girl or his next girlfriend. Cheers and may love bless us all!


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What Guys Said 1

  • Everyone deals with break-ups differently. But I think most people feel very confused about what they want after they end a relationship. That confusion has a significant impact on how we behave, as his needs and fears will fluctuate and conflict with each other in varying degrees.

    Me personally, I usually have a rebound girl after a break-up and they are very temporary. I don't pursue girls that I'm interested in being serious with until I know my head/heart are in the right place. However, that doesn't mean you can't date right now. Just take things very slow right now. Invite him to do something with you... anything you like.

    PS. Try to be friends for a while. If you really think he's a good catch, don't become his rebound girl. If you are looking for a fling... go for it, but it doesn't sound like that's what you want.

    • No I'm ready for a serious relationship. So is he. Maybe that's why he said he is not ready to date again yet, since he is "totally interested in me" according to his best friend.

    • Show All
    • Yeah it does. I'm in the same boat right now. I've been friends with someone for a couple years, and I'm pretty much in love with her at this point. I honestly don't know what to do about it. She's graduating in a few months, and moving so there isn't much point in doing anything about it. Sometimes I think she wants me too, but neither of us will say it. Not sure what to do about tit myself.... oh well

    • Well if it was meant to be it will be (thats what I keep telling myself). If you like her that much I, personally, would talk to her and see maybe if yall can figure it out if you both like e/o. It depends on how far she is moving and the long distance relationship stuff. Maybe you need to initiate it first to see how she feels because she might be shy.

What Girls Said 1

  • Confusion wreaks havoc on the mind.

    If you want to go out with him that's fine, but be aware of what you're going to get out of this.