Never had a boyfriend. Should I get a friend involved?

Alright so I am 16 and I haven't had a boyfriend before. (My birthday is next week) and I have a thing for this guy that I've known for 3 years. We don't talk much because he doesn't go to school with me. I have liked him for a really long time. He's sweet, funny, cute etc.

I am really terrible at flirting. Obviously, since I Haven't had a boyfriend yet. I am willing to try and branch out and make the first move; he is good enough of a catch to try. But should I ask a mutual friend who is pretty close with us both, if he would even be interested- or keep it to myself?

Here's the twist; he is in college. I'm a junior, senior next. He is a frosh in college.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • I think asking your friend for advice is a good decision. It will help heaps. As for the age gap, don't worry about it. It's a societal judgement that is based on nothing. Even in the bible, which is one of the most morally excepted books in the world, Abraham was 10 years older than Sarah. There is nothing in an age gap other than what is let be. If that makes sense. I'm sorry if the example offended, it was the best I could think of.

    • Thank you so very much :) It definitely didn't offend me- it made me feel better! I have been worrying that the age difference would be ... difficult. But you put it a good way. Thanks and I will take your opinion to heart :)

What Girls Said 1

  • Romeo and Juliet ultimately face their miserable fate because they allow too many other people to repay messages for them. You're 16, you've probably read the story... Moral of the story? If you want something done properly, cut out the middleman and to the darned thing yourself. If your friend's a girl, there's an additional predictable factor -- if she's the one who keeps approaching him, chemistry's building between them , not you and the guy...

    Now consider the fact that you're young, and don't need to be tossing yourself at a college guy who is probably hanging out with college girls. You're thinking, "He's a nice guy" (code for "He's Prime A and /I want him") and a little upset by the introduction of this image of him, especially if you don't have much contact with him.

    How often do you see him and in what context? Depending on the situation, just smile and say hi. If he chats you up, he's interested. It doesn't have to be the most scintillating conversation. I had a discussion about paperclips with a guy yesterday and it ended with a chat about what we were doing on Saturday evening. Oh, look at that...we're both free. (No realtor's fee, no tragic deaths, just a live conversation because we're all just people.)

    If you're shy around him it's because you've put him on some kind of pedestal. He's only human, girl. Just be friendly with him (asking, for example, what he does weekends, how does he like college, etc...) and if he's interested he'll come around. ;-)

    • Your so nice, thank you for the advice:) It was interesting to compare your opinions to the other. I will take yours to heart also; I think I will do a mix. Thanks so much!

      And your paperclip convo gave me a genuine LOL :)

    • GAG's definitely here to offer you the opportunity to see what everyone suggests, to pick and choose as you need to. At the end of the day it's all about you making the best choice for yourself. :-)