Girls, can a guy go too slow in dating?

Reason I ask is because I just met this girl a week ago. I'm not sure if we're officially dating but we went out last week. Not sure if it is a date or just hang out. Then I'm calling her today to ask her out again. After this next hangout/date, I'll make sure the next one is called official. I have a good way to do that. But let's say she thinks we're dating(which I hope...), if I don't kiss her by the second date, will she lose interest and move on? I mean, if she thinks what we did last week was a date and we have another date this week, and I don't try to kiss, would she think we're not dating? I kinda want to wait until the "official date" which would be our 3rd time going out but I do really really want to kiss her now :)

So should I try to kiss her the next time we go out? If she thinks we're dating it should be a good idea, but if she isn't 100% sure we're dating, it might be good to wait until an "official date".


Most Helpful Girl

  • As for "your " kisses, there yours to give to whomever, when you are ready, but honestly, I have never been on a "date"and if I set everything else aside to go out with you in my mind it is a date; I have always been walked to my front door and kissed,sir, otherwise I would've got the message we didn't hit it off and if you called again, I would feel like I was on your "back up" date roster (LOL). But men carry different standards yours are very high *hats off to ya*really. Besidesm kissing doesn't make two people "official" mutual agreement does. Good luck! I bet you get that kiss;-)

    • I hope I get that kiss :) she's amazingly cute. Like a couple years ago I would never have even attempted to talk to someone as gorgeous as she is.

      But a lot of girls don't want to be kissed on the first date if it's someone they just met before going out. I only knew her two days before going on the first date...

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    • I'm not sure if she wants to go on a "date" for sure. She just gave a time when she'd be free next week.

    • if she gave you a time, that means she wants to go out.

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • Yes a guy can be too slow and for me it is a turn off

  • yes they can!

    • So when should I try for the first kiss? Next time we get together but run the risk of her not thinking we're for sure dating OR the third time we go out(if she says yes) because it'd be a "real date" then?

  • yes you are going a bit slow.

    i would like kiss by the second date. if he doesn't even try to touch me by the second or third date tops I would think he is not interested.

    After the first date, I would be very discouraged if I don't hear from him within three days. I would think he doesn't like me.

    So definitely kiss her or try, see if she is receptive.

    And after the second date, you should contact her within a day if it goes well.

    • Only reason is because I'm not sure if we're official. I touched her on the first "maybe date"... her hand, shoulder, arm. Just quick touches.

      But if she doesn't think we're officially dating, would a kiss on the second hang out scare her away? If we waited until the official date then a kiss would for sure be right...but at the same time that might be too slow for someone as beautiful as this girl. What do you think?

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    • As in it's a date and not a hang out.

    • I'm 75% sure she thinks the first thing was a date, but I just don't want to assume we're dating. Read the comment I just made on the guy's post below. The last part says how I'll make it official for the 3rd time going out.

What Guys Said 1

  • Go for it, worse thing can happen is she doesn't want to date or she wants to go slower, If she is of the same age as you, and still single, she is probably looking to settle down (seeing as you're 25-29)

    • I'm 19 and she's 20. Also, she's gorgeous. Like she could be a model. At least a "9", maybe a "10". So that might change something... but really, if we're not officially dating in her mind and the kiss is too soon, she might stop seeing me.

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    • well she's obviously into you if she wanted to go out on the day she doesn't work... You should of gave of this information before

    • Here, I'm gonna send you a friend request and after you accept I'll send you a message. I have a longer version of this question that I asked to my friend on here that has much more detail.

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