Why is he still hanging onto me?

I don't even understand what he's trying to do anymore. He used to really like me for several years. (Please read this! Sorry it's so long!) I was in a serious relationship for most of the time, but when I got out of it I started to get hints that he was interested. He expressed his interest in an odd way so I tried not to get involved.

He asked me to hook up with him... never asked me on a date or anything. I don't hookup with friends, especially not my best friend. It just didn't seem like a good idea so I said no. Who asks someone to hookup with them anyway? He also slapped my butt once when we were hanging out... we were not dating and I was JUST out of my serious relationship. It seemed like something only people who are dating should do.

Time went by, I realized (through flirting) that he might be genuinely interested. I fell really hard. We finally got together, just cuddled, talked all night, gave each other massages, told made each other made up travel stories about where we wanted to go, watched the sun rise, tickled each other and wrestled etc. However, when it came to kissing, it just never happened. I had to head back to college on the other side of the country. Towards the end of the weeks together he made some odd comments like, "if I get a girlfriend we can't do this," and "you can kiss me, but I'm not going to kiss you." It really made me think he wasn't interested...

4 weeks after I got to school we were talking online and he told me he just wanted me and that he wasn't ever into me and that it might have been revenge for not liking him sooner. We continued to talk some, but I was pretty hurt and I didn't believe him. The following year he kind of completely ignored me. I asked him what was up and he said he had just used me, his feelings for me faded and we weren't close anymore. I was devastated because I didn't feel that way AT ALL. And since when/how did he use me?

Obviously, since he used me all along I said we couldn't be friends. He REALLY didn't like that. Eventually made me pinky promise to speak to him again. Well, now we are "talking" and it's kind of odd. He responds to me like every 2 weeks. It's not like he can't check his phone daily? Is he just stringing me along? Or is he hoping to keep me around because he might still have feelings for me somewhere deep down? He wrote me a letter all about how I'm the person he's closest to and he hopes to find someone like me... but says he's not interested.

I've dated/moved on to two other guys since all of this. I feel like he's playing this game with me and I'm SO not interested. However, if I ignore him back he'll accuse me of playing games! It's a lose lose for me. So do I grin and bare hanging out/talking to him? Ignoring him altogether just upsets him. But really, he's had too many second chances. The final straw was a long long time ago. What do I do with him now?

  • He's playing games/stringing you along
    Vote A
  • He's confused
    Vote B
  • He still likes you somewhere deep down
    Vote C
  • Other?
    Vote D
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What Guys Said 1

  • Anonymous User:

    Nut case.

    If ignoring him makes him suffer, that's his problem.

    He played you.

    You're doing the right thing, going out with other guys.

    • Lol thanks. He's had a rough life, so I'm trying to be nice?

    • Show All
    • He didn't use your body; the used (toyed with) your mind and emotions with little emotional attachment to you. That's playing you.

    • hmm yeah. I can't believe that happened.

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