Is his text even worth a response?

I went on a few dates with a guy until recently when he said he didn't want a serious relationship right now and that he needed to recover from his last bad break up before jumping in again. But he asked to stay friends which I agreed to. I backed off for 2 weeks or so, but then checked in with him just to say hello. He responded and was friendly. A few days later I asked if he wanted to meet for drinks as friends to catch up. I never got a response. Three days later he said he was sorry he didn't respond, he was out that night and he was just hanging out on the beach the next few days with a group of friends. Then asked how I've been.

I just moved here and all I'm trying to do is establish a friendship with him as well as find a group of friends to do things with. I would have loved to be included in going to the beach with them. I'm a little annoyed because it's hard to start over in a new city and I know he isn't deliberately leaving me out, but he is one of the few connections I've made here. Am I being unreasonable? Should I respond to that text letting him know that it's okay and I'm doing great? I don't know how to establish a friendship with him without hanging out, but I don't know how to hang out with him without pushing him away. After he didn't initially respond I thought I would never hear from him again and that asking to be friends was his way of dumping me.

Any advice on what I should do if anything?


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What Guys Said 1

  • You should respond and not over-think it, and expand other options to meet other friends at the same time.


What Girls Said 1

  • I think that I would have felt the same way. But you really can't blame him, as he probably didn't even think about asking you to come with him. You two have only really been talking for a couple weeks it sounds like, not long enough to really be invited out with friends. Who knows, maybe his friends rented a cabin or something and it was their getaway that they have been planning for a while. Perhaps it was a guys only thing?

    What I would do in response would be tell him that sounds like a lot of fun. Say that you love going to the beach, but unfortunately you are new to the city and don't know anyone to go with. This way it's kind of like hinting at him to ask you, and hopefully he will take the hint.

    Tell him you don't really know anything fun to do around the city, invite him to be your guide one night. See if he will go out for dinner with you. This might be the push he needs to take that step.

    I know how you feel, I moved to a new city where I didn't know anyone a couple years ago. Now it's my home. But I am moving again and will have to start over new!

    It sucks, because I am moving even farther away from friends, but do your best to find people or even groups to join to find new friends.

    Go on social networking sites, ask if there are things going on, look around, search news papers, websites, flyers, etc... Anything that can help you figure out what is around you to do.