He told me not to expect a serious relationship, why?

my first love and I started seeing each other again we broke up 4 years ago and since he's been back in my life for the 100th time he's told me he still loves me and that he misses waking up next to me and comming home to me every night that he misses having me in his arms he goes out of his way to come see me regularly and asks me out on dates talks to me all day every day .. I have not said anything about feelings towards him what so ever and we woke up the other morning and he told me we had to talk and said that he doesn't want me to expect any kind of searious relationship from him ... yet he's taking me out tonight and wants to spend time with me ... I just don't get it I havnt said anything about being with him or even wanted that yet what he said is buging me and it made me start to think about things.. I said to him you love me and you miss me but you don't wanna be with me and I'm not aloud to see other guys? he told me yea but it has nothing to do with you ... I don't get it please help

Ur all right ...I'm done


Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't know but something about this pisses mi off and it's not happening to mi. lol.

    I'd tell him he can keep his head up his ass and keep eating his own sh*t if he thinks it's that good. It doesn't have to do with you (in a sense) it has to do with him.

    What you can do is to get him out of your life. He is saying that to keep you there for his own selfish reasons (more than likely) and he knows you will be there for him because you have been so many times. He may even act shocked or angry if you tell him that he needs to get his sh*t and go because more than likely it will trigger one of those two responses. Either wth!? Why is she talking to mi like that? What's gotten into her? Or Wtf!? How the hell can you say those things to mi? and blames you and acts like you did something wrong and he's the victim or he is in the right and you are in the wrong.

    It's pretty clear that he wants to say his sweet words and hope like hell they go far with you. He has no right to tell you who you can and can not see. He is not your man and does not intend to be and he himself has said that. So he can take his list of demands and leave because they do not have any place in your life now or ever. If you do not feel the same towards him then it will be easy as hell to let him go you do not owe him any sense of loyalty especially if he has done nothing to deserve it.


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What Girls Said 3

  • He wants his cake and to eat it to! If that's not a deal breaker for you, then it's time you start evaluating your own self worth. Your relationship sounds more like a friends with benefits scenario except you don't even have the freedom of seeing other people. He wants you to be committed to him, but he doesn't want you to expect the same commitment from him? In what world is that acceptable?!

    Exactly how long is this arrangement going to last? And how much time are you willing to throw away on someone who is obviously not ready to take big boy steps and make big boy decisions?

    Maybe you're secretly hoping that he'll eventually come to his senses. Or maybe you're just a fool in love, but my mother always told me, that when someone tells you something, believe them the first time.

    It's pointless to be upset and there is no confusion here. You simply have a decision to make. The idea of breaking things off might be to difficult to follow through on at present, but if you're going to stay and stick it out, do it with your eyes open, without false hopes and delusions. Know that he will most likely never be the man you will want him to be. That way the fall will be a softer landing.

    I hope you find the strength and love within yourself to realize that you deserve to be loved right.

    I wish you luck in love.

    • I really hope you are done. You certainly don't deserve this level of disrespect. It will be hard at first, but as long as you allow him to hold your heart hostage, you'll never have the door open for someone good to walk into your life. Please take care of yourself and your heart.

  • I have totally been where you are. I get it, my ex and I of two years broke up and he took me out one night to tell me I was his soul mate and he wanted to take me out places and be with me but just to see if things would work out. I eventually realized I was being used. He would invite me out on double dates so that he didn't have to look like a loser.

    Took me a while but honestly, move on. I know it is so simple to slip back into those emotions because you have been there once, but you shouldn't be willing to get hurt again or used by the person who claims to love you, if he really did, he would let you move on :)

  • You've taking him back 100 times? You don't say anything about your feelings? you are a door mat for him. He just wants you there to have sex and female contact. If he doesn't want a relationship with you. It means he wants other women too. Wow.